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“You don’t strike me as someone who turns down anything she wants to do.”

“You’re not wrong.”

“But?” If he had asked me yesterday, I would have jumped at the chance. Hell, I did jump at it and would have if Liv hadn’t interrupted. Flirting with him was okay. Hooking up with him might have been toeing the line, but catching feelings for him would be falling into the deep end and drowning. I see it clear as day now, how easy it would be to fall for him. It’s that reality—that fear—that holds me back and keeps me from leaning into him now—into whatever this is.

“I’m leaving in three weeks.”

“All the more reason to come inside now.” He shifts in his seat, leaning in toward me.

I tilt my head into the moonlight that is now shining into the cab. “Friends?”

The tension is heavy, my breathing unsteady as he leans in further, closing the distance between us. His lips are a mere inch away from mine. He’s going to kiss me and even though I know that I shouldn’t, I’m going to let him. My eyelids flutter closed and I tilt my chin. His warmth engulfs me and his breath is warm on my—ear?

“Friends. For now.” His deep voice vibrates all the way down to the pulsing point between my thighs. My chest rises and falls, and I swear there is next to no oxygen left in this truck. I feel dizzy,holy shit.Has someone ever passed out from a near kiss? This can’t be healthy.

He pulls back with a knowing smirk on his face because he’s not oblivious to the effect he has on me. I narrow my eyes at him, though I’m fully aware that I’m the reason we’re not kissing—or anything else—right now.

With one hand, he throws the truck in reverse, backing upuntil he’s avoided his cat. He puts it in drive, the wheel sliding seamlessly through his large hand, and we make our way back up to the main house—him on his metaphorical high horse, because I’m sure he knows as well as I do—my willpower around him is next to nothing. My uncomfortably wet underwear is proof of that.

Knox

The tipof the sun hovers over the mountains warming up the pitch, and my throat clogs with a hefty dose of nostalgia as I stand out here in the place where all my dreams were first formed. I laid in my bed last night, unable to sleep, and for the first time, it wasn’t thoughts of rugby, my shoulder, or my future that kept me up.

It was Taylor.

I stared at my ceiling for hours, thinking about her smile, her raspy laugh, and the way she makes the most mundane things feel exciting. My thoughts took a turn somewhere along the way, and when I closed my eyes, I could feel the gentle weight of her body pressed against mine. I could feel her pouty lips beneath the touch of my thumb, and when my mind finally landed on the memory of her body humming as I closed the distance between us in my truck, that’s when my hand slid into my briefs and I fucked my palm.

As I cleaned myself up, I stood at my bathroom sink, catching the reflection of someone whose focus wasn’t entirely on recovering or rugby for the first time in a longtime. I woke up this morning accepting the fact that Taylor’s not only a distraction that I welcome, but one that I’m begging for. I got dressed and drove out to my old school, home of the Sundevils, to tell Coach that I appreciated the offer, but I already have one thing demanding my attention right now, and I can’t afford another.

Deep red, orange, and yellow leaves line the thick layer of trees on the far side of the field. I close my eyes, drop my head back, and inhale the clean, crisp fall air.

“It might not be a lot, but it is home.”

I smile, opening my eyes to find Coach Campell standing next to me. He’s bundled in his black Sun Devils jumper, looking straight ahead to the same fall foliage that had me transfixed.

“I’ve played on numerous pitches over the years, Coach. This one is up there with the best of them.”

He huffs a laugh. “Maybe if you take me up on my offer, you could convince some of these lads of that yourself.”

“Or I could very well let even more people down.” I tuck my hand into my pocket, looking down at my shoes.

“I don’t think you’ve let anyone down.” I scoff, looking anywhere but his eyes. “I’m serious, Knox.”

“When I first got signed and I left, I came home four months later and you all had a town parade.”

“That doesn’t sound like disappointment to me,” he interrupts.

“I’ve been gone for years, and now I’m back with nothing to show for it. The words don’t need to be said, but I know I’ve let people down. They’re disappointed,” I pause, my eyes still trained on the ground. “Or they pity me, which is worse.”

“Or they don’t think twice about ya.” I look at him then. “Maybe they’re just happy you’re back. Circumstances be damned.”

I’m not arrogant enough to think that everyone is hung up on me, but I am aware enough to know that I should still be embarrassed. I’m the guy who left the town and the people that I love for bigger places and bigger dreams, and no matter how successful of a career I’ve had, I’m back now with nothing to show for it but a highlight reel. You could Google me and find a list of my accolades, every record I hold, and a full list of my stats, and that would sum up everything there is to know about me.

“Hey, Coach.” Three boys walk past us, their duffle bags slung over their shoulders, one spinning a ball between his hands. I watch as they pass, making their way over to the benches and I see a clear vision of the past. I see Dax, Liam, and myself walking in line, ready to play the game we love.

“So when do you get that thing off?” he asks, pointing to my arm.

“First thing in the morning.”