Page 84

We walked out in silence and I got behind the steering wheel. The heavy overcast sky that kept the morning dreary was beginning to break up. Clouds parted in the distance and rays of sunshine poured through.

"It's turning nice. At least we won't be driving in rain," I said. No one responded. I didn't think anyone else even noticed the weather.

I put the car in drive. When I gazed into my rear-view mirror, I saw Danny standing outside the trailer, his arms folded, looking very satisfied with himself.

I drove out, turned right on the highway and headed west. Still, no one had spoken.

"I guess you had better take out your map again, Crystal," I said.

She unfolded it without a word.

Raven had the right side of h

er face against the window. She watched the scenery flow by, took a few deep breaths and then closed her eyes.

"This must be some kind of record. Betrayed by two creepy guys in less than twenty-four hours," she said with a shaky laugh.

"I'm sure you'll find someone honest and true someday, Raven," I said. "We all will."

"I still can't believe that Danny." Raven wiped angry tears away.

Butterfly leaned forward and put her hand on Raven's shoulder. Raven turned, smiled at her and covered Butterfly's hand with her own.

"Why was he so mean to us, Raven?" Butterfly asked.

"Because he's mean to himself," Crystal replied for her. "He hates who he is so he hates everyone, even his own mother."

"I thought he was lucky having a mother," Butterfly said.

"He is," I said, "but he doesn't know it." "Or care," Raven added.

We were all silent again and then Raven smiled,

"You know," she said, "I was just thinking. Maybe we're not so unlucky after all. Maybe we've got something better."

"What?" Butterfly asked her.

"Each other," she said. "We've got each other." I drove on toward the emerging sun that, like us, was heading west again.

1 0 On the Road Again

It rained again. Driving had lost its excitement for me and became dreary and monotonous, especially on the longer Interstate highways where there was little to look at except other cars. Every time we saw a highway patrolman, we cringed a bit, but none appeared to take any real interest, some not even giving us a passing glance. I made sure to stay well within the speed limits. Our stops for gas, for lunch and finally for dinner were the only events that stirred any enthusiasm. Butterfly slept a lot. Crystal, who could read anywhere, had her nose in a book, and Raven, bored and upset, pouted, dozed, fidgeted and complained. Regret, like a determined snake, slithered into our thoughts, hissing at us periodically through small remarks, moans and sighs.

"Summers weren't all that bad back at Lakewood," Raven muttered just before we stopped for dinner. We had gone nearly an hour without anyone uttering a sound. The radio droned on, but I was no longer listening. "At least we got away from Gordon and Louise more when we worked."

"That's wonderful, Raven," I said. "I must have been on drugs because I wasn't aware you were in such a state of bliss back there. I was stupid enough to think you hated almost every minute of it. I guess I just imagined the continuous stream of complaints pouring out of your mouth."

"I didn't say I liked it," she snapped. "I just said it wasn't as hard in the summer Maybe we should have waited until the fall to run off."

Crystal lowered her book.

"My hope is we'll find another place to live and finish school there. If we first left in the fall, we would be way behind by the time we started a new school," she said.

"School? Who cares about school?" Raven cried.

"Don't you think Butterfly will have to go to school? And still want to apply for scholarships," Crystal replied calmly. "If I knew you believed we would never return to school, I wouldn't have left."

Raven muttered something under her breath and stared angrily out the window.