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times, searching for the same reassurance.

We had lost enough parents. It was impossible

to simply sit by and watch someone else approach the

same sort of doorway to sorrow.

"I ran back to my friend's house with the telephone number and gave it to her mother," Crystal

continued. "I saw the strange way she was looking at

me, but I still didn't ask any questions. Instead, I stood

by and listened as she called my father's brother. 'Stuart,' she said, 'This is Vera Raymond,

Thelma's friend next door. Yes. Yes, I'm fine. Stuart,

there's been a terrible accident. A car accident. Karl

and Thelma . . Both of them have been killed. I'm so sorry,' she said. 'Yes, it happened a few hours ago. A drunk driver in a pickup truck. I'm sorry,' she repeated," Crystal said. "I have it all committed to memory. I often relive it through horrible flashbacks. Sometimes, it just takes the ringing of a phone and I

see the whole episode," she explained.

"Anyway, that's when and how I first heard

they were dead. For a moment it was like

eavesdropping on someone else's life. I still didn't

fully comprehend, Brooke. I listened attentively to

every word. I heard her say, 'Yes, she's with us. What

do you want to do?' She listened, nodded and then she

turned and looked at me as if he was telling her

something about me that she never knew. Of course,

she knew I had been adopted, so that wasn't it,"

Crystal said quickly. "I don't know what he said, but

she looked at me and nodded. 'I understand,' she said,

'but what do you want to do in the interim, Stuart?

Really?' she followed. 'All right. I'll find out and take

care of it,' she said. 'I'm sorry.'

"Then she hung up and explained that my parents had been killed and my uncle wasn't coming to

take me to his home. He had told her to call the Child

Protection Services. Later that afternoon, they came

for me and I was back in the system," Crystal said. "I attended the funeral," she told me, "but after