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And inside me something dies as well. Fury loved me before Khaosti evenlikedme. It’s like a foreshadowing of the end, and I don’t know if I’m strong enough to take any more. I hear a whisper at my ear. “You can do this,” Grimlet says. “Don’t let him break you as he broke your mother.” The words remind me that I’m not alone, that I have friends. But that makes me scared. Will Grimlet be next? Will Lucifer pulverize him to dust?

The chanting stops abruptly.

“What happened?” Lucifer snarls.

“I don’t know,” Zeryth answers. “His beast is dead before the severance was complete. That’s never happened before.”

Khaosti’s head has fallen forward. He’s still held up by the guards, but his body is limp. I think he’s unconscious. I hope so.

“Take them away,” Lucifer snaps. “I have a wife to bury.”

I don’t say anything as I’m dragged to my feet by another guard. Even the pain has numbed. Everything is gray around the edges. We follow the guards carrying the limp form of Khaostiout of the room and along a dark corridor, then down beneath the ground.

They eventually stop in front of an iron door, open it and toss Khaosti’s body inside.

I’m dragged a little farther. The next door opens, and I’m thrown inside.

The door shuts and the lock clicks. Well, this is going well.

And then I start to cry.

Chapter 47

When I Have a Visitor

Iknow. Crying isn’t good. But I think I’ve earned the right to a little breakdown. Or a fucking huge one. That’s what it feels like—as though I’m breaking apart, shattering into little sharp jagged pieces.

Every time I think about Fury, the pain and grief spiral.

My mom’s dead. And I’m crying for a wolf. But he was so alive and beautiful and magnificent. And now he’s gone. I don’t even want to think about what Khaosti must be going through right now. He’s lost a part of himself.

And yeah, my mom’s dead. And I never got to know her. And she suffered for five thousand years. And right to the end, she still loved that fucking bastard. They say love is blind, but shewasn’t blind. She knew exactly what he was. She knew he needed to die. But she couldn’t do it. Because she fucking loved him.

I’m not sure about love. Maybe it’s a mistake. Maybe I should have kept my distance from Khaos. Then this wouldn’t hurt so much. Hecate warned me to stay away from him.

And what about Hecate? Has she been working with Lucifer all along? Lying to me. Pretending she cares about me. She’s my aunt. How could she? And why? It makes no sense.

Plus I’m hungry. It doesn’t seem possible with everything else that’s going on, but it’s been a long time since I ate.

What a disaster this is. In the best-case scenario, I succeed but Khaosti—and me—end up very dead. In the worst… I don’t want to think about it, except my brain doesn’t cooperate. My father promised me that he’d make me, and everyone I love, suffer in unimaginable ways. Which means I really shouldn’t try to imagine them, but I’m betting my dad is really good at torturing people. He’s had a lot of practice after all. Nausea churns in my belly. I can’t be sick—it will hurt too much.

My head is pounding. Which at least takes my mind of the fact that my nose is smashed, and my ribs are broken, and every little movement sends agony slicing through me. So I keep very still. And cry.

Eventually, I run out of tears. I become aware that I’m lying on the cold stone floor of a small underground cell. The light is dim—I don’t know where it’s coming from, but it illuminates the bare stone walls. There’s no furniture, nothing except a pair of shackles fixed into the wall. I suppose I should count myself lucky that they didn’t chain me up.

Grimlet is stroking my hair and murmuring what I suppose are words of encouragement.

Hey, I made a new friend. That’s nice.

Except he’s going to die as well.

I’m facing the wall, and I realize that Khaosti is on the other side. If he’s alive. But we’re bonded mates—I’d know if he was dead. Wouldn’t I? So I have to have faith.

I blow out my breath—very carefully—and think about sitting up. I’m still thinking about it when I hear the door click. I go completely still. I want to be brave, but it’s too soon. And I’ve decided I’m not a brave person after all. I wish I’d accepted that earlier, and I might never have ended up here, and Fury would still be alive and…

The door swings open, and Hecate stands in the doorway. She has a tray in her hands, with two bowls. One I’m sure contains food and my stomach rumbles. The door shuts behind her, and she lowers the tray to the floor, then straightens. She looks down at me and I glare back.

She bends down and gets a cloth from one of the bowls on the tray, then she kneels down beside me. I flinch as she reaches out but then stay still. I can smell the magic, and I lay without a word as she raises my shirt and places the warm cloth across my broken ribs. I’d rather accept help from anyone else right now, but I haven’t got a lot of options, and I’m less than useless with broken ribs. She whispers the words of a healing spell and the pain fades and finally vanishes to nothing, and I breathe deeply. She takes the cloth, rinses it in the water and places it across my broken nose. And I can breathe again.