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“Um…spilling your cum over my back or belly?” she squeaked. “That last little curse you always groan out sends shivers down my spine—like you’re the king of the world and flying higher than any bird in the sky.”
I rubbed a hand over my scruffy jawline, eyeing Rhett. I knew that voice—craved it. Missed it. But I wasn’t jealous she’d gotten to enjoy him while I’d been in the hospital by myself every night.
I would gladly have suffered countless more days, over and over, to see my desires come to fruition exactly as they had done.
The bond between them had fully sprouted to life.
46
Rhett
We hadn’t actually discussed the future, hadn’t mapped out what it would look like with Skylar included in our daily lives, but I couldn’t imagine anything different than what I enjoyed playing out in front of me.
I lounged on the living room chair within eyesight of the kitchen while Skylar busied herself cleaning up our dinner mess—without help, she’d insisted after I’d offered.
Ash leaned onto the island, chin propped in his hand as he watched her. He wore his heart on his sleeve, but I imagined I appeared the same.
Skylar hadn’t put a name to the emotion I felt at having Ash home safely with us, but it did match that sense I had after ejaculating with either of them. Complete, utter satisfaction, that everything was right in the world for that moment.
The problem?
I didn’t want the three of us to last a mere blip of time. Yes, I expected I would miss having Ash to myself, but I couldn’t imagine going back to the way things had been before Skylar had arrived.
My uptight reservations dampening the feel of our home. Stoicism and childhood trauma dictating how our evenings would go. Dinner parties with similar-natured acquaintances who didn’t soak in every moment like I’d learned to do since Sky had slammed into our lives.
I had shed that skin, and even though I sometimes found myself automatically going to enter robot mode at times, I recognized it for what it was.
Shutting that shit down came easier than turning off my emotions like I’d thought I had mastered. I’d bottled up so many for dozens of years, never allowing myself to truly enjoy the deeper meaning in life.
My three days of off work, visiting Ash in the hospital with Skylar, taking her to talk to a doctor about her ADHD, and sleeping with her wrapped around my body all night had filled in the empty parts of my heart I hadn’t realized I’d kept closed off.
So much unconditional acceptance. Freedom to express—being encouraged to do so and heard without scorn—gave me a new outlook on my existence.
Skylar was so much more than sunshine, but I didn’t have words to adequately describe how she made me feel.
I just knew I didn’t want her moving out, moving on, or moving in a direction that didn’t include both me and Ash by her side.
She finished wiping down the counters, hung the rag to dry, and ambled over to Ash.
“How are you feeling?” she asked him, rubbing her hand down his arm from shoulder to wrist.
He twined their fingers together and straightened in his chair. “I’m not in pain. No more nausea. Still tired though.”
Skylar smoothed his hair off his forehead, and he closed his eyes, leaning into her touch I knew soothed him on a deeper than skin level. Her gentle, feathering fingertips always did the same for me.
I smiled, more than content to sit back and watch the two of them interact. They would make beautiful babies, I imagined, a little redheaded boy with big hazel eyes or maybe a brown-haired girl with her mom’s green ones.
Sudden longing shot through me so damn hard that my breath caught.
I yearned for both visions to come true with a deep hunger I’d never felt before. No longer did I worry about noise and chaos. I needed to see a visual manifestation of our love—their love—more than I cared about my sanity.
For the first time since Ash had brought up the idea of inviting a woman into our lives to bear his children, I got it.
Thoroughly.
And I wanted the same without a single reservation.
I stood and approached them, my nearness drawing them out of their own little world.