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Chapter Fifty-Six
Lilianna
I sat in the front seat of the car, sipping on coffee and having just finished the breakfast Nicolaus had packed.
My eyes glanced over at him as he drove, his profile strong and relaxed in the mid-morning light.
After our intense encounter by the lake, he had tenderly helped me clean up, wrapping me in a soft blanket before guiding me back to the car.
My body still hummed with the aftereffects of our connection, a pleasant soreness reminding me of every moment we'd shared.
"You're staring," Nicolaus observed without taking his eyes off the road, a small smile playing at the corner of his lips.
"I'm admiring," I corrected, taking another sip of the perfectly brewed coffee. "There's a difference."
His smile deepened slightly. "How are you feeling? I wasn't... too much?"
The hint of vulnerability in his question made my heart clench. Even after everything we'd shared, he was still concerned about my comfort, my well-being.
"You were perfect," I said softly, reaching across the console to place my hand on his thigh. "Intense, but perfect. I've never felt anything like that before."
His hand covered mine, fingers intertwining as he squeezed gently. "Good. I wanted it to be memorable."
"Oh, it was definitely that," I laughed, feeling heat rise to my cheeks at the memory. "I'm not sure I'll ever be able to look at a forest the same way again."
Nicolaus chuckled, the sound warm and rich in the enclosed space of the car. "That was rather the point. I wanted to give you something that was entirely ours." The possessiveness in his tone sent a pleasant shiver through me.
"Where are we going now?" I asked, watching the forest gradually thin as we approached what looked like a small town. As we passed a sigh, ‘Heaven’s Rest”. The roads were becoming more populated as we drove into town, colorful storefronts and cafés appearing along the winding street.
He didn’t stop until he pulled up in front of a store that said ‘Harmony’. I blinked and glanced over to Nicolaus, “A music store?”
Nicolaus gave a smile, “I thought I would take you to your first music lesson. I had Julian pack your violin last night.”
My breath caught as I processed his words. "You want to teach me violin?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. The thought of learning to play—really play, not just the rigid classical pieces my mother had forced on me—sent a flutter of excitement through my chest.
"Not me," Nicolaus said, his eyes soft as he watched my reaction. "I arranged for you to have a lesson with someone who specializes in helping people rediscover their love of music. Someone who understands that technique means nothing without passion."
I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes. I know we all had talked about getting me lessons but with everything I had put it in the back of my mind, “Thank you.”
"This is..." I trailed off, overwhelmed with emotion. "I don't know what to say."
Nicolaus reached across the console, his hand gently cupping my cheek. "You don't need to say anything. I've seen how you look at your violin—like it's both a treasure and a burden. I wanted to help you find the joy in learning something you have always wanted to do."
I leaned into his touch, blinking back tears. The thoughtfulness of this, using the time on our date… “I didn’t get to say it earlier…but I love you.”
The words hung in the air between us, soft and precious. Nicolaus's eyes widened slightly, his thumb brushing across my cheekbone as he absorbed what I'd said. For a moment, his carefully composed mask slipped entirely, revealing something raw and vulnerable beneath.
"I love you too," he whispered, his voice rough with emotion. He leaned across the console, capturing my lips in a kiss that was tender and reverent, so different from the passionate claiming by the water.
When we finally broke apart, he rested his forehead against mine. “You are definitely not something we thought would walk into our lives. We had mostly given up on finding someone for our pack.”
“It's funny how fate works," I murmured, tracing the sharp line of his jaw with my fingertips. "I wasn't looking for any of this either. I was just trying to survive."
Nicolaus caught my hand, pressing a kiss to my palm that sent warmth spiraling through me. "And now?"
"Now I'm living," I said simply. The truth of it settled in my chest like a physical weight—not heavy, but grounding. "For the first time, I think I'm actually living."
His eyes softened at my words, and he seemed about to say something more when a tap on the window startled us both. A petite woman with wild silver-streaked curls and bright blue eyes stood outside, grinning widely at us.
"You must be Lilianna!" she called through the glass, her voice carrying even through the closed window. "I've been waiting for you!"
Nicolaus chuckled, straightening in his seat as he turned off the engine. "That would be Elena," he said, his voice carrying fond amusement. "She's... enthusiastic."
I smoothed my hair and checked my reflection in the mirror, suddenly nervous. "She seems very energetic."
"She is. But she's also incredibly gifted. She's helped dozens of people reconnect with music after difficult experiences." He squeezed my hand reassuringly. "Trust me, you'll love her."
We climbed out of the car, and Elena immediately swept forward, her flowing bohemian dress and multiple bangles creating a symphony of gentle sounds as she moved.
She was probably in her early thirties, but her energy was infectious, radiating warmth and creativity.
She moved forward taking my hands in hers without hesitation.
Elena’s grip was warm and surprisingly grounding as she held my hands, her bracelets chiming softly with every movement.
“You’re even more beautiful than Nicolaus described,” she said brightly, giving my fingers a gentle squeeze before she leaned in with a conspiratorial wink. “Though, between us, I suspect he was underselling you.”
I blinked, caught off guard by the easy warmth in her voice.
Her energy was… magnetic, like sunlight made human.
Beside us, Nicolaus was carefully lifting the violin case from the back seat of the car.
His expression was calm, but there was a softness around his eyes I’d come to recognize—pride, maybe. Or something deeper.
I tucked my hair behind my ear, trying to find words. “I’ve actually… never played before,” I admitted, a flutter of nerves tightening in my chest. “I’ve wanted to, but… it just wasn’t something I was ever allowed to do.”
Elena tilted her head, curiosity blooming in her expression. “Not allowed?”
I nodded slowly. “My mother didn’t see the point. She said playing instruments was a waste of time for someone like me. That I needed to focus on… more important things.”
Her expression shifted, the warmth still there but edged now with understanding. “Let me guess,” she said gently. “Learning how to be the perfect Omega?”
A sharp breath escaped me. “Exactly. Studying etiquette. Family lineage. Healing techniques. Womb care,” I said with a slight bitterness, my voice quieting. “She thought the violin was too selfish. That it served no one but myself.”
Elena was quiet for a moment. Then she gently released my hands and opened the shop door with a flourish. “Then let’s be selfish today.” That simple statement cracked something open inside me.
Nicolaus stepped beside me, offering the violin case with both hands. “Go on,” he said. “I’ll be right out here if you need me.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to come in?” I asked, still holding his gaze.
He leaned in slightly, his voice low. “This is for you . I wanted you to walk through this door and know that you’re allowed to take up space in the world. This is a beginning, Lilianna—not just a lesson.”
I nodded, my throat thick, and took the case from him.
Then I followed Elena inside. The inside of Harmony was nothing like I expected.
It was warm, rich with the scent of aged wood, pine resin, and old paper.
Soft golden light streamed through lace-curtained windows, falling across rows of instruments displayed with care.
Every violin, cello, and viola rested in carved wood cradles like sleeping children, their lacquered bodies gleaming beneath the sunlight.
It didn’t feel like a store.
It felt like a sanctuary.
The floor was dark hardwood, covered in layered rugs that softened each step.
Crystalline chimes hung from the archways, catching the breeze and producing a soft, musical murmur.
Stacks of sheet music sat beside record players and worn leather chairs.
Everything in the space felt touched by time and intention.
“I don’t take many students anymore,” Elena said as she led me down a side hallway. “But when Nicolaus told me about you, I knew I’d say yes. You’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?”
I nodded, not trusting my voice. She opened a door into a sunlit room tucked at the back of the shop.
The walls were painted a warm cream, the window framed with ivy trailing from a hanging pot.
In the center sat two armchairs, a music stand, and a stool carved with flowers.
A single violin hung on the wall behind the stand.
Below it, a handwritten sign in curling ink read: “Your first breath matters more than your first note.”
It made my chest ache.
“I want you to start by holding her,” Elena said gently.
“Feel her weight. Her shape. Let her know you’re listening.
” I nodded and opened the violin case carefully.
Inside, the violin lay cradled in plush velvet, the warm reddish-brown of its varnish glowing like amber in the afternoon sun.
I reached out with trembling fingers, running my fingertips along the graceful curve of the body, the fine lines of the f-holes, the delicate bridge.
It was beautiful.
“I never thought I’d actually get to do this,” I whispered, barely breathing. “I used to dream about it when I was little. I’d imagine sneaking one out of a concert hall after everyone left. Just to try. Just once.”
Elena smiled. “And here she is. Waiting for you like she always was.” She guided me through the basics with the patience of someone who had taught grief and rebirth just as often as notes and rhythms. We didn’t jump into music right away—she had me hold the violin first, feeling the curve of it beneath my jaw, the way the shoulder rest nestled into the hollow of my collarbone.
My muscles tensed awkwardly, unsure, but she gently adjusted me until I felt… balanced.
When I finally lifted the bow, it felt odd, but at the same time it felt freeing. I was doing something I always dreamed of…and no one was stopping me…but encouraging me.
“Don’t worry about making something pretty,” she said. “Just breathe. Let her speak.” I drew the bow slowly across the open G string, flinching at the squeal it made. My cheeks flushed, but Elena grinned.
“Beautiful.” She gave a laugh at the look I probably had on my face.
“That was… painful,” I muttered, glancing at the violin bow with an almost betrayed look. I hadn’t expected to play something, but I didn’t expect the first thing I played to sound like nails on a chalkboard.
“That was honest,” she said. “Try again. But this time, breathe.” So I did. The next note wasn’t clean—but it was better. A long, slow sound, trembling at the edges but undeniably music. I stared at the string like it had conjured magic. My heart fluttered.
Again.
Another note. Stronger. Fuller.
And again.
I lost count of how many times I tried—how many wrong notes squeaked out, how many moments I laughed or flinched or gasped when the bow caught. But Elena never stopped smiling. Never rushed me. Every note, no matter how flawed, was progress.
“This is the first thing I’ve ever done just for me ,” I whispered, halfway through practicing my open strings.
“I know,” she replied softly, the genuine smile on her face as she watched me. “And it shows.”
The hour passed in a blur of vibrations and wonder. When we finished, Elena helped me polish the strings and showed me how to store the bow properly, explaining rosin and tension with easy, practiced grace. I closed the case gently, pressing my palm to the lid before latching it shut.
It felt like I was tucking something precious inside. A version of myself I hadn’t dared believe I was allowed to meet.
“I’ll see you next week,” Elena said as she handed me a printed copy of the practice exercises. “And don’t worry—your fingers will be sore tomorrow. That’s how you know you were brave.”
I smiled through the tightness in my throat. “Thank you. Really. You’ve given me something I didn’t think I could ever have.”
Elena reached up and patted my cheek, eyes bright. “No, sweetheart. You took it. And you’ll keep taking what’s yours. One note at a time.”
When I stepped back outside, the sunlight had shifted. The street was still quiet, the storefronts humming with the calm of the afternoon. I spotted Nicolaus a few feet away, leaning against the car, but he had his phone in his hand, typing something out.
I just stood on the sidewalk for a moment, violin case in hand, the breeze lifting the hem of my dress as I just watched him for a moment, a smile on my face.
These men in my life…they were everything to me.
They made me a home…given me love….let me go from the shy, unsure girl to more outgoing…
curious. Something I never thought possible.
I didn’t think I could love anyone as much as I loved them. They changed my life, and I hoped I was doing the same to them. I would forever be grateful to them and would show that by loving them and staying by their side until they no longer wanted me.
Table of Contents
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