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I spent the next twenty minutes exploring the store with growing confidence, Julian and Davina both patient as I touched various materials and asked questions.

I selected the weighted blanket in merino wool, several pillows in the scent-retaining fabric, a collection of ultra-soft throws in coordinating colors, and the green bamboo-silk scarf.

Each item felt like a small declaration of independence—choices made based on my own preferences rather than what others deemed appropriate.

"Is there anything else you'd like to explore?" Davina asked as we gathered my selections. "We have some lovely essential oil diffusers designed specifically for nesting spaces, and temperature-regulating sheets that many omegas swear by."

I glanced at Julian, who nodded encouragingly. "The sheets might be helpful during your transition period," he said quietly. "Dr. Chen mentioned you might experience changes in body temperature regulation."

The practical consideration made sense, and I found myself drawn to a set of sheets in a soft sage green that would complement the other items I'd chosen. The fabric felt impossibly smooth, with a subtle cooling effect that seemed to promise comfortable nights even if my body temperature fluctuate.

"I'll take these too," I decided, adding them to our growing collection.

As Davina began processing our selections, Julian moved to examine a display of small, decorative items. He returned holding a beautiful stone lamp that emitted a soft, ambient glow.

"This might be nice for your space," he suggested. "The light is adjustable—bright enough to read by but can dim to a gentle nightlight."

I touched the smooth surface of the lamp, admiring how the light seemed to glow from within the natural stone. "It's beautiful."

"It's a himalayan salt lamp," Davina explained as she carefully wrapped my other selections. "Many find the light particularly soothing for nesting spaces—less harsh than traditional lamps."

Julian added it to our purchases without further discussion, his quiet generosity making my throat tight with emotion.

As Davina tallied our selections, I felt overwhelmed by the growing total but also by something deeper—the care Julian was showing in helping me create a space that would truly be mine.

"This is too much," I whispered to Julian as Davina moved to wrap the lamp. "You're spending so much money on me."

Julian turned to face me fully, his hazel eyes serious.

"Lilianna, creating a proper nest isn't frivolous spending—it's essential for your wellbeing.

Especially during the transition you're about to undergo.

" His voice softened. "Besides, seeing you discover what brings you comfort is worth every penny. "

I bit my lip, still struggling with accepting such generosity. "But what if I change my mind about what I like? What if I chose wrong?"

"Then we'll come back and get different things," Julian replied simply. "Preferences can evolve, and our pack makes more than enough to spoil you.”

His casual mention of "our pack" sent a flutter through my chest that I wasn't quite ready to examine. The possessive warmth in his voice when he said it made me feel claimed in a way that should have been frightening but instead felt... safe.

"Thank you," I managed, my voice thick with emotion I couldn't quite name. "For all of this. For letting me choose."

Julian's expression softened, and for a moment I thought he might reach out to touch my face the way he had during my panic attack. Instead, he simply nodded. "Always, Lilianna. Your choices, your comfort, your pace."

Davina returned with our beautifully wrapped purchases, her smile warm as she handed me a small card. "Please don't hesitate to call if you have any questions about caring for your new items, or if you'd like to explore additional options in the future."

I took the card with a smile, grateful for her kindness. "Thank you for being so patient with me. I've never been allowed to choose things for myself before."

Davina's expression grew gentle with understanding. "That makes your choices today even more meaningful. Trust your instincts—you picked beautiful items that will serve you well."

As we loaded the packages into Julian's car, I felt a lightness I hadn't experienced in years. Each wrapped bundle represented a small act of rebellion against the rigid control I'd lived under, a step toward becoming someone I was only beginning to discover.

"How do you feel?" Julian asked as we settled into our seats.

I considered the question, running my fingers over the soft bag containing the bamboo-silk scarf. "Excited," I admitted, surprising myself with honesty. "And nervous, but in a good way.”

"A good kind of nervous is something worth exploring," Julian said with a warm smile as he started the car. "It means you're stretching beyond what's familiar."

I cradled the bag with the scarf, my fingers tracing the outline through the tissue paper. "I never thought shopping could feel so... significant."

"It's not just shopping," Julian replied, pulling onto the main road. "It's self-discovery. Each choice you made there, was an expression of who you are beneath all the expectations that were placed on you."

The thought made me pause. I'd never considered my preferences as meaningful parts of my identity—they'd always been dismissed as unimportant or actively discouraged. "I liked the green," I said softly. "And things with weight to them."

Julian nodded, his expression thoughtful. "I noticed that. You were drawn to natural colors and substantial textures. Things that ground you," Julian finished, glancing at me with approval. "It speaks to someone who values stability and connection to the natural world."

I hadn't thought of my preferences in such terms before, but his observation rang true. "Miles would probably say it connects to my response to his garden," I mused, remembering how peaceful I'd felt among the plants.

"He would," Julian agreed with a soft chuckle. "Miles has always believed that people's aesthetic preferences reveal deeper truths about what they need for emotional wellbeing."

As we drove through the late afternoon light, I found myself thinking about the evening ahead. The idea of arranging my new nesting materials, of creating a space that truly reflected my own choices, filled me with anticipation I hadn't expected.

"Julian?" I said quietly. "When we get home... would you help me arrange everything? I mean, if you're not busy."

His expression softened, a gentle smile spreading across his face. "I'd be honored to help. There's nothing more important on my schedule today."

The sincerity in his voice warmed something deep inside me. "Thank you. I just... I want to make sure I'm doing it right."

"There's no 'right' way to build your nest," Julian said, his voice gentle but firm. "Only what feels right to you. But I'm happy to help you experiment with different arrangements until you find what works best."

We drove in comfortable silence for a few minutes, the bags of nesting materials securely placed in the back seat.

I found myself sneaking glances at Julian's profile, noting the strong line of his jaw and the way his eyes remained focused on the road ahead.

There was something inherently calming about his presence—a quiet strength that didn't demand attention but provided unwavering support.

My phone buzzed in my purse—an unfamiliar sensation since I'd never had a phone until given one last week by this pack. I pulled it out to see a notification from Dr. Chen's office.

"It's the doctor," I said, my heart rate picking up as I opened the message. "She says my results are ready and she's attached them to the patient portal."

Julian kept his eyes on the road, but I could sense his heightened attention. "Would you like to review them now, or wait until we're home where it's more private?"

I hesitated, my finger hovering over the link. Part of me wanted to know immediately, but another part feared what the results might reveal. "Maybe we should wait. I think I'd feel better having everyone there when I read it.”

Julian nodded, “Then we will do that once we get home.” I felt my chest flutter at the words, I could definitely get used to seeing this place as home.