Page 145 of When the Stars Rise

“Not all of them.” Everly shrugs and grabs a strip of bacon off the plate on the counter. “I just took a few scoopfuls.”

Isla bursts out laughing. “I can’t believe you did that.” She smacks her sister’s arm while Hayley and I watch from our stools at the island. “Why didn’t you tell me that’s what you were doing?”

“I just needed you to act as a diversion so I could dip into the urn while they were out of the room.” By them, I can only assume she’s talking about Zeke’s parents.

“Dip into the urn? Scoopfuls?” Sage mutters, shaking his head. It’s only seven in the morning and he’s at the stove flipping pancakes. “That sounds so wrong.”

Everly smiles. “Zeke would have found it hilarious.” Her eyes meet mine and I nod in agreement.

He would have had a good laugh over it, that’s for sure. My gaze drifts to the glass doors where the sun is just beginning to rise over the mountains and the fjord, and I think what I always do when I travel to a new place. Zeke would have loved it here.

“You’re fucking lucky I didn’t make coffee with those ashes,” Bodhi says, pouring a glass of orange juice and pulling up a stool across from me. “Why did you put them in a coffee container?”

Everly rolls her eyes. “I’m pretty sure you’re not allowed to transport ashes on a commercial airline. This container is perfect. It has a strong seal.” She demonstrates by unlocking the hinge then closing it again and holding the canister against her chest like a newborn baby.

“So what’s the plan?” Hayley asks, pouring syrup over the stack of pancakes Sage set in front of her. Just as if this is all perfectly normal.

None of this is normal. We’re in Norway. I canceled the trip, but Hayley rebooked it for a later date and rented a big-ass house with vaulted ceilings, blond wood, a sauna, and a hot tub on the wraparound deck.

She seems to think it’s important and feels that I need to do this. When our friends found out, they decided to tag along which I suspect was Hayley’s plan all along because this house has enough bedrooms for all of us.

So here we are in Norway. One big happy found family.

“Stop feeding him bacon,” Hayley says, glaring at Bodhi.

“He loves it. You’re obviously starving the poor guy. Besides, we all know he loves me the most.”

I whistle and call his name and Simba is next to my seat in a shot, looking up at me with his big brown puppy dog eyes. Simba is an Aussiedoodle mix, still young, only eighteen months but his previous owners couldn’t handle his exuberance for life.

He goes to jump in my lap because he thinks he’s a lap dog. “Sit.” Simba sits and looks up at me with hopeful eyes. “Stay.” Ican tell he’s dying to jump into my lap, but I have to be firm with him. Can’t have him doing whatever he wants. “Good boy. You’re such a good boy.”

I pat my lap and he leaps right into it.

“Sucker,” Bodhi says with a snort.

I’m a total sucker for this dog, can’t even deny it. It’s like having a fifty-pound sheep sitting on you. I stroke his white and gray fur and he hums with contentment, his eyes rolling back in his head. He’s such a lover, this one.

“This is so unfair,” Hayley mutters. “It was my idea to get the dog.”

Unfortunately for her, everyone knows that dogs only have one true master, and our furry guy chose me. But he loves Hayley unconditionally, so it doesn’t matter that he always comes to me first. “He loves you.”

She sighs. “I might have to get another one and leave you at home next time.”

I laugh. We went to the shelter and adopted Simba the day after Hayley rescued me from the ocean. I think we needed him just as much as he needed us.

Best decision we ever made.

I take him on my runs with me and he loves to swim in the ocean and sleep in our bed (although we really need to break him of that habit).

My dad, who knows the truth now just like the rest of my family, said animals are good therapy and I think he’s right. Simba made a big difference in my life and in Hayley’s. All he wants is love and affection and he gives us the same in return.

“We’re going to scatter Zeke’s ashes,” Everly says after we’ve eaten breakfast. “But not just in one place. He was a wanderer. He loved mountains and oceans and rainforests in far-flung places. So we’ll leave a little piece of him everywhere we go.” Shelooks at me. “So maybe you can take some of his ashes up to the mountain with you?”

I nod once. I don’t really know what to say. All of it is a bit overwhelming, to be honest.

Hayley grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze and we do that thing with our eyes where we communicate without words, and I know exactly what she’s saying. “You need to find a way to forgive and let go,” she says.

It’s our thing now. The thing we’ve been working on for the past two months. I don’t think either of us believes that it will happen overnight. But we’re doing the work, just like Jude said I needed to, and I’ll be honest. It sucks.