Page 132 of When the Stars Rise

“You’re going to be such a good dad. The best, really.” I brush the tears from my eyes. “That little girl or boy will be so lucky to have you.”

He presses his lips together and looks up at the ceiling. It looks as if he’s fighting back tears. I hope he doesn’t cry because if he does, I’ll lose it again. “Not sure what I ever did to deserve a second chance with you, but I thank God every day that you came into my life.”

CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT

Hayley

When I reachthe edge of the pool, I flip and kick off from the wall, my arms slicing through the water in long, even strokes swimming lap after lap. Thanks to all those years of swimming lessons, I’m still a strong swimmer.

My parents always said that swimming was a life skill. After I passed the test where you have to tread water in your pajamas, my parents put a pool in our backyard, but they always made sure to keep it covered at night so there wouldn’t be any accidental drownings.

Now I just keep swimming like Nemo, my head underwater, only coming up for air when my lungs start to burn. It’s quiet and peaceful. Or it would be if not for all the noise in my head.

I’ve been home from the hospital for four days. It took me three days to convince Dean and Zoe to finally leave me alone.

I’ve been thinking a lot about that conversation with Everly, and the role Noah played. I understand why he lied to Zeke’s family. It was kinder to let the Harringtons believe their son’sdeath was an accident. And knowing him the way I do, he would have tried to protect Everly too.

But is hiding the truth to spare someone the right thing or the wrong thing to do? I guess it depends on the person you’re keeping it from and what the secret is.

For Everly, it was better to know the truth. And I think it’s the same for me. Maybe not then, but it is now.

I know it was my fault. I’m the one who caused the accident that killed my parents. And I know now that Noah did everything in his power to protect me from the truth and preserve my parents’ memory.

My dad wasn’t a big drinker. He rarely had more than one beer and only on the weekends. But he’d had a few drinks at that wedding and maybe his reflexes weren’t as quick as they should have been. Or maybe it had nothing to do with that and everything to do with my actions.

I stop swimming mid-stroke and let myself sink like a stone to the bottom, my hair floating around my face, air bubbles rising. Beams of sunlight reach below the surface and bounce off the mosaic tiles. Such a pretty pattern.

It’s hard to believe that the sun is still shining but somehow it is. It’s even harder to believe that even on the darkest days I still have hope that things will get better.

The human spirit is so resilient. And I can’t leave Noah on his own.

So I swim toward the light and when I break through the surface, I float on my back, the sun pink behind my closed lids, and I go back to the place I’ve been running from for six long years.

A winding road in the heart of Hill Country, Texas where wildflowers bloom in the spring and fields are carpeted with blue bonnets.

The air smells sweeter in Cypress Springs, like freshly cut grass and cypress. The night sky is filled with so many stars. They look so close you feel like you can reach up and touch them.

I fell in love in that town. I fell in love with a boy whose eyes were the same shade as the sun filtering through the towering pines.

I fell in love with a boy who had hearts in his eyes and smelled like sunshine and sweet dreams and I followed that boy everywhere. Across the fields on his dad’s ranch. Up trees where the branches were so high, we could see straight up to the clouds.

I followed him everywhere because he was my home, my wish on a star, my every dream come true.

That town holds my very best memories and my very worst. A night so shrouded in darkness, so weighed down in tragedy that I’ve never been able to think of Cypress Springs without remembering all that was lost.

Our car swerved off the road, plowed right through the guardrail and plunged down a steep hill to the ravine.

I remember how loud it was. A cacophony of sound. A symphony of brakes screeching. Metal grinding against metal. Tree branches scraping against glass. A sonic boom like a bomb detonating.

And then everything went silent. So deadly silent.

I remember being confused when I regained consciousness.

I remember the smell. Chemicals released from the airbags and the scent of gasoline.

I remember hearing my dad saying my mom’s name over and over again.

And I remember how unbearably hot it was in the car and that every time I tried to take a breath I started coughing.