Page 35 of We May Be Fractured

Cold Winter

[Now playing ? This December—Ricky Montgomery]

E ver since that night out—which Aaron was pretty sure counted as a date—he hadn’t hung out with Landon, apart from when they had to.

Something had shifted.

Landon had become more distant, as if he was pulling away.

Their usual Tube rides and lunch breaks with Fell had turned into sessions of brief, straight-to-the-point chats.

The sleepless nights they used to share were a thing of the past, with Landon now spending more time alone, often retreating to the summer house in the garden.

Aaron found himself with unsmoked cigarettes in his pocket and fewer bags of peppermint tea around the house.

A part of him believed it was all for the best. Distractions were the last thing he needed right now; soon, he’d be in Australia, starting fresh. But the other part stubbornly refused to give up hope.

His mind kept drifting to the Lights show and, more so, to what almost happened—or rather, what didn’t happen—when they returned home.

He was pretty sure Landon had been about to kiss him, right before Aunt Olivia’s call interrupted them. Aaron couldn’t shake the worry that he might have messed things up without meaning to.

Nyle seemed to pick up on the tension and had stopped his usual teasing. Fell, too, had noticed something off between them. He’d tried to ask Aaron about it a couple of times, but Aaron always managed to dodge the question, either cranking up some tunes or pretending to be busy.

Ria was the only one who didn’t poke around. She simply winked at Aaron knowingly before disappearing with Landon on their Thursday date night.

On Friday morning, Aaron accidentally ended up overhearing a conversation between Landon and Nyle in the kitchen. He’d just returned from his morning run, and Nyle’s voice echoed through the corridor.

Aaron lingered out of sight, not because he wanted to eavesdrop but because he wasn’t in the mood to deal with Nyle so early in the day.

But then, hearing his own name, his attention was hooked.

“He’s more than just a ‘friend with benefits’, isn’t he? You actually like him,” Nyle was saying, sounding pretty serious for once.

Landon said something back, too low for Aaron to make out.

“‘I burn. I pine. I perish’,” Nyle dramatically quoted.

“Look, Lanny, as your cousin, I’ve got to say this.

The way you are with Aaron, it’s different.

You’ve never opened up like this to anyone.

Heck, since you moved here, he’s the only one you’ve brought into your Fortress of Solitude.

Not gonna lie, kinda jealous here, but hey, I love you. Just…don’t let this slip away, okay?”

“Don’t let what slip away?” Landon asked.

“Aaron.”

After a choked laugh, Landon retorted, “We both know as soon as he’s done serving his sentence, Aaron will fuck off to Sydney…or wherever he plans to go.”

“Doesn’t matter. Life’s all about grabbing those good moments, even if they’re short. Enjoy it while you can.”

Everything went quiet for a bit, and then Nyle spoke up again, “You hear me?”

“Yeah, I heard you.”

“You deserve some happiness.”

Right then, a soft, furry thing brushed against Aaron’s legs—Kat, purring away in the shadows. Aaron crouched to give her a gentle stroke on the head, her big eye looking up at him.

Maybe Nyle was onto something. Aaron figured perhaps it was time to stop overthinking and live in the moment like his parents never allowed him to.

*

T hat Saturday, after a quiet—and strangely productive—shift at the retirement centre, Nyle got the gang to check out the Christmas lights on Regent Street. Same as last year, massive angels lit up the street.

Aaron didn’t exactly buzz about it, mainly because of the crowds. He struggled to keep up, especially when Nyle turned the whole experience into his own personal photoshoot, nearly getting run over by taxis and buses every two minutes, trying to get his ‘perfect shot’.

Meanwhile, Landon stayed in his own little world, hands stuffed in his pockets, wandering and looking at all the Christmassy window displays. He didn’t chat with anyone, and even Ria’s attempts to cheer him up didn’t work.

“Let’s check out the Christmas market at Trafalgar Square,” Nyle suggested, and pretty much everyone seemed game for it. Well, everyone but Aaron and Landon.

They went along anyway, finding themselves in a packed square with the traditional sad-looking Christmas tree in the middle and a bustling faux-German market.

The food stalls heaved with people, and the aroma of grilled sausages was too good for Aaron to pass up. He got in line with Nyle and Maeve. Cliff joined them shortly after. Landon and Ria, on the other hand, made a beeline for a burger stall not too far away.

As they waited, Nyle and Maeve chit-chatted, catching up on their plans for the holidays.

“This year’s gonna be epic. We’re all doing Christmas Day together,” Nyle said, all pumped up. “Luzanne’s off work, and Landon’s even agreed to give my gran’s turkey recipe a go.”

“What about your folks?” Maeve asked. “Still a no-go with them?”

Nyle let loose a muted groan. “Told them straight up—if they can’t accept me for who I am”—he gestured to himself—“then that’s it, no more visits. I won’t go back there and pretend to be what I’m not. I don’t care if they think I’m embarrassing myself. I’m proud of who I am now.”

Maeve looked at him sympathetically. “As you should be. You know, one of my brothers is a huge fan of yours.”

“The hot one?”

“Oh, fuck off.” Maeve playfully shoved him. “It’s little Sammy. He loves your outfits, and he’s been asking Mum to get some of them for Christmas.”

“He’s got good taste, then. He’ll turn out fine.”

Maeve then turned to Aaron. “And what about you? Any family plans?”

Before Aaron could say anything, Nyle jumped in.

“Aaron’s got no family, so he’s one of us.”

Cliff gave Aaron a ‘what the hell is he talking about’ look from behind Nyle.

Maeve patted Aaron’s back, apologetically. “You’re welcome at my place too. My mum always cooks like there’s no tomorrow, and with seven of us, who can blame her?”

Nyle chuckled. “Bet it’s pretty cool having six brothers, huh? They seem super protective of you.”

“You have no idea. They can be a pain in the ass though. They’d give Aaron the third degree if he popped over.”

Nyle wrapped an arm around Aaron, pulling him in close. “Nah, Aaron’s part of our crew. Even Kat loves him.”

“You must be quite the special guy, Aaron.”

Maeve’s comment had him feeling anything but. As she and Nyle kept on talking, Aaron zoned out, his attention drawn to the food stall. The sizzling sausages almost hypnotised him with how the heat made the air above the grill crinkle, reminding him of scrunched cling film.

Christmas was around the corner, but Aaron wasn’t feeling the holiday cheer. Each year, the festive season left him more alone, a reminder of how disjointed his family had always been, long before the car accident changed everything.

He shivered in a chilly gust as he stood waiting for his food. The cold bit at his nose and ears, his hands and feet turning into blocks of ice. He only started feeling his fingers again when he finally got his hands on his piping hot bratwurst.

Landon and Ria had somehow managed to beat them to it. They’d already finished their burgers and had joined the queue for some hot chocolate. Nyle and Maeve approved the idea and joined them, leaving Aaron and Cliff by themselves.

“So, when did you become an orphan?” Cliff asked, his eyes narrowing.

“I am an orphan,” Aaron replied.

“What about your aunt? She’s still around, isn’t she?”

Shit. Aaron flicked his gaze away.

“You haven’t told her, have you?” Cliff continued. “And here I was, thinking she kicked you out after finding out what a twat you are. You’re just a bag of lies.”

Aaron tried to move away, but Cliff grabbed his arm.

“You know,” he pressed on, “back when we were at school, with all the chatter about the ‘scarred boy’ who just transferred, I genuinely wanted to be your mate. I remember seeing you doodling those Marvel heroes in your textbook during class. Your drawings were wicked. And I caught bits of your music taste when you played your tunes in the corridor between classes. I get it now. I thought you were my friend, but I never was yours.”

“You don’t understand. It was a tough time—”

“Don’t bother with the trauma story. I might not understand everything you went through, but I wanted to. I waited for you to open up, but you never did. I even overlooked all those lies you told. Is this Australia thing even real?”

“Yes, it is.”

“And who’s Tori, the girl in your voice messages?”

That caught Aaron off-guard. He hadn’t talked about Tori with anyone, least of all Cliff. He wasn’t about to start now.

Cliff’s expression held frustration and something else. “You’re the usual selfish prick. You just can’t help it, can you?”

“And how exactly am I being selfish?”

“Well, let’s see. Befriending Landon like you befriended me in school, only for your own benefit. Smart move, Aaron. Even better, fucking him. That’s so you . I almost feel sorry for him when he realises how you’ll screw him over…in more ways than one.”

“Fuck off,” Aaron snapped, shoving Cliff.

Ria, hot chocolate in her hand and halfway towards them, picked up her pace at the scuffle.

“Whoever you’re chasing in Australia,” Cliff added, “I hope they see through you. You don’t deserve anyone.”

As Cliff stomped off, Ria’s eyes met his worriedly, and she mouthed, “Are you okay?”

Aaron wasn’t sure himself. He managed a weak smile and glanced away, but inside, he was a mess. Cliff’s words stung. Was any of this real, or was he as selfish as Cliff had said?

Not too long after, Nyle joined them, carrying a steaming Christmas mug, and for the first time, Aaron welcomed the distraction of having him around, chatting away about nothing in particular.