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“Mom?” I answer.

AJ’s brows are knitted together across the table from me as he looks at me in alarm.

“Baby, sorry it’s so late but Marissa just called and said Connor was having symptoms of a heart attack. There’s an ambulance on the way for him and she asked if I could come stay with the kids.”

“Shit. Is he okay?”

“I don’t know.” Her voice wavers, and if it’s hard for me to hear this, I can’t imagine how hard it is for her to hear this given the fact that she lost her husband to heart disease nearly twenty-five years ago. “I’m on my way over there now.”

My heart races. “Mom, just focus on driving. We can talk later.”

“No, no. Keep talking. You always know what to say.”

My chest tightens as I try to think of the right thing to say. I fail. My mother is the one who comforts me in times like this…not the other way around.

“It’s going to be okay,” I say softly. “What were his symptoms?”

“I’m not sure,” she says. I hear her turn signal clicking in the background.

“Are you close to their house?”

“Mm-hm,” she murmurs. “Two minutes away.”

“I’m getting on the first plane I can so I can be there with you, okay?”

My mom needs me. I’ve needed her plenty of times in my life. It’s my turn to be there for her.

I thought she’d put up a fight. I thought she’d tell me not to come because it feels too scary to have me there. Instead, she says, “Okay.”

Fear plagues me that it’s serious.

This is my older brother. I was born when he was four, and I spent my entire childhood idolizing him. I was three and he was seven when he taught me how to climb the rock wall at the park near our house. I was five and he was nine when he broke his arm because we were jumping on a trampoline and he fell off. I was nine and he was thirteen when we went through losing our father to heart disease. I was twelve and he was sixteen when he first snuck porn into the house. I was thirteen and he was seventeen when I caught him having sex in the backseat of our mom’s minivan after his homecoming dance. I was fourteen and he was eighteen when he moved out of my mom’s house and went to college, but we talked every single day. I was twenty-one and he was twenty-five when he married Marissa.

We haven’t talked every single day like we used to, but life happens. He’s married with two kids and has the kind of career that keeps him incredibly busy all the time, and I have my own shit I’m dealing with that keeps us from being able to talk as often as we once did.

And maybe I don’t idolize him the way I once did, but he’s still my brother. He’s still one of my best friends. We can get together at Christmas and pick on each other and laugh and wrestle like we did when we were kids…although he did throw his back out two years ago when I pinned him against the wall. I’ve gained athleticism in the last decade, while he’s gained grays and a receding hairline.

I will not be thirty-three when I lose him.

“I’m here,” she says. She blows out a breath, and I can tell she’s nervous to go inside.

“Mom, it’s okay. You’ve got this. Call me anytime, no matter what it is. I’ll text my flight details when I have them. Okay?”

“Yeah. Thanks, baby. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

She ends the call, and I stare at my phone a beat while silence passes between AJ and me.

“Everything okay?” he finally asks.

I shake my head. “My older brother might be having a heart attack.”

“Oh, Jesus. Where is he?”

“Chicago suburbs.”

“What can I do to help?”

I shake my head as my eyes meet his, and it’s in that moment I remember exactly why I wanted to play again. It’s not just the love of the game. It’s the brotherhood. The atmosphere. The respect and the teamwork and the dedication to doing everything we can for each other. “Nothing, but thanks. I need to let Troy know what’s going on then catch a flight out of here.” I stand and throw some cash down on the table. “But you’re joining me in Vegas, right?”

He nods as he stands, too, and he reaches out to shake my hand, pulling me in for a quick hug where he slaps my back. “Yeah, man. You need anything, you call. And let me know how he’s doing, all right?”

I nod. “Thanks, brother. I’ll see you soon.”

I head up to the suite I’m sharing with Troy and Mike, searching for flights as I go, already knowing they’ll understand that I need to get to Chicago as soon as possible.

And I’m not wrong.

“Family first.” Those are Troy’s exact words, and part of me wonders whether those words would’ve been different before he found out he had a daughter.

The daughter I’m banging on the sly.

What the fuck am I doing?