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I decide to swing by Mia’s apartment after work, and when she answers, she looks less than delighted to see me. She barely grunts out a hello, but she opens the door a little wider anyway. Dylan isn’t sprawled on the couch, so this feels like a good time to talk.

“Is everything okay?” I ask.

She folds her arms over her chest. “Not really.”

“What’s wrong? Are you mad at me?”

“You mean aside from ignoring my calls and texts for weeks in favor of your boyfriend?” she demands.

I’m still standing in the doorway as she hurls that particular accusation at me. “Are you serious right now?”

She raises both brows pointedly.

I blow out a breath. “Mia, you’ve been so wrapped up in Dylan that you haven’t had time for me, either.”

“Don’t you dare bring up Dylan,” she hisses.

“Why can’t I talk about Dylan?”

She purses her lips for a beat before she plows forward with it. “What you’re doing to him, to all the interns…it’s so, so unfair.”

I feel sucker punched, and I actually take a step back at her words. “What I’m doing to him?” I repeat. “What, exactly, has he said I’m doing?”

“You’ve got connections the others don’t have, and you’re going to get that position because of who you’re related to when you don’t even care about baseball. You don’t deserve it.”

“Excuse me?” I say, my hand moving to my chest defensively. “I have worked my ass off to try for the position. And I do care about baseball. A lot.”

“More than our friendship,” she mutters.

My brows pinch together. “Are you kidding me? We’ve all been busy! You’ve got your own internship, too, and you’re always with Dylan—”

She cuts me off. “I already told you to keep his name out of your mouth. You should take your name out of contention for that position. Give someone else a chance instead of getting it because you’re related to the manager and you’re fucking a player.”

Tears pinch behind my eyes. I can’t believe she just said that to me, and I have no idea what Dylan has been coming home to tell her, but there’s no way it’s the truth.

I’ve worked really fucking hard to get to where I am. Do I have connections? Absolutely. Have I used them?

Not really.

Yet her words press on every insecurity I have. She confirms that I’m not good enough—not deserving enough—and it causes my chest to feel a little hollow.

It also makes me feel like my friendship with her has run its course. We’ve been friends a long time, and we’ve gotten into fights before, but we always find our way back.

This, though? I’m not sure we can come back from this one.

“Wow,” I murmur. “Great knowing what you really think.”

I spin on my heel and head back out the front door that we never closed behind us, and I rush down to my car. A text comes through just as I draw in a shaky breath in my driver’s seat.

Captain: Where are you?

I’m looking blindly through tears as I read it.

Me: Just leaving Mia’s. You?

Captain: Just got home. Do you have time to come over?

Me: On my way.

I decide to call Justin on my way to Cooper’s as a distraction from what just went down.

“Hey girl hey,” he answers.

“Hey boy hey. What’s going on?” I ask.

“Nothing. Just waiting for Brian to finish dinner with his parents before he comes over.”

“Do his parents know about you two?”

“His do. Mine still don’t,” he admits.

“Are you ever going to tell them?”

He clears his throat rather pointedly. “Are you ever going to tell your dad about you and Cooper?”

I blow out a breath. “Touché. But the answer is yes. We agreed to tell him.”

“You did? When?”

“We don’t have a when . I guess I’m just…”

“Scared?” he guesses.

“Well, yeah.”

“Of what?”

I’m quiet a beat while I try to put it into words. “I spent the majority of my life thinking he didn’t want me thanks to what my mother told me. What if he doesn’t want me after he finds out I’ve been sneaking around with Cooper for the last six months?”

“Oh, honey,” he says softly. “He’s your father. He will always want you.”

“And so will your parents.”

“You don’t know Dean and Laura Larson the way I do,” he says. “They’re very conservative, and I hear the things they say when they think I’m not listening. I know they love me, but they will never understand me.”

“That’s only true if you don’t give them the chance to understand,” I point out.

“We’re a couple of hot messes, aren’t we?” He chuckles, but the truth is that none of this is very funny at all.

“I think we’re both well within our rights to be scared about telling the truth, however different those truths may be.” I brake for a red light, and my heart breaks a little for my friend as I try to push what just happened with Mia out of my mind.

“They’re not that different. Neither of us thinks our parents will approve of the man we’ve fallen in love with. The root of that might be different, and the results, and the reasons and reactions…but the fact remains that we can’t choose who we’ve fallen for.”

“Love?” I shriek. “You love Brian?”

“Dude, have you been paying any attention at all? We’ve been together almost as long as you and Cooper have!”

I can’t help but feel a little shocked at that, but I guess it’s true. “I haven’t been a very good friend lately,” I say. “I’m sorry. I’ve been so caught up in my own problems and work and school that I haven’t really looked around me much lately.” Is that true of my relationship with Mia, too? I don’t think so. I think I am genuinely upset with the way she chose Dylan over me just now. On the other side of the coin, Justin has been nothing but supportive.

“You’re happy, babe. That’s all I care about. And I’m happy, too. And if I have to keep that happiness a secret anywhere from a little while until forever…then so be it.” His voice carries some dejection to it.

“It won’t be forever…for either of us. You’ll tell them when your timing is right, and so will I. I can’t sit here and tell you everything will be okay for you and not believe it for myself, too.” And it’s the first time I really try to believe in those words.

I’ve spent my entire life trying to be perfect, and it still wasn’t good enough for my mother.

But my father isn’t the man she painted him to be my entire life.

So now I just need to get past those fears—not of just admitting to him that Cooper and I are in love but admitting that we’ve been lying to him for six months now.

It’ll be okay.

It has to be.

Because I’m not ready to face losing either of the two most important men in my life, and I’m also not willing to make a choice between them.

I just hope I’m not forced to.