Page 18

Ellie

T he last twenty-four hours of my life don’t feel real.

It feels like I’ve accidentally swapped bodies with another person and I’m living a life that isn’t mine. From the moment Colin met my family to when he came into my room last night, everything that’s happened since then feels like a fantasy and not my reality. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. For me to gasp awake suddenly as the last moments of this dream trickle and fade out of my mind, but that hasn’t happened yet.

At this point, I’m beginning to think it won’t.

Every time I close my eyes, I see Colin, intense and unnerving, standing at the foot of my bed watching me. I can still feel the weight of his body on top of mine. His hot mouth between my thighs, the scrape of his stubble on my skin and his fingers buried deep inside me. I shiver, recalling the way my body reacted to him. How easily I melded into a version of myself I never even knew existed as he coaxed that blinding orgasm out of me. I broke every rule I made concerning him last night and I’ve spent the entire day wondering what that means for us now.

Have things changed?

How will they change?

After the way he kissed me at the market earlier, I think it’s obvious what the answer is, but I still need to be sure. There were so many times today when I almost asked him, but fear kept my tongue at b ay. I’m not certain how well I’d handle it if he turned around and told me that things can only be casual between us. Which is precisely why those rules existed in the first place.

Yeah. A lot good those did me.

Blowing out a breath, I grip the edge of the kitchen counter, waiting for the last bag of popcorn to finish popping in the microwave. It’s evening now and we’re back at the house after a full day of fun, too much food and excitement. My mum’s shoot took longer than she expected it to take so she’s spending the night in London, but will be back home tomorrow morning. Earlier we had fish and chips for dinner which Colin made from scratch (and was delicious by the way) and now we’re getting ready to watch Jurassic Park . I volunteered to make the popcorn, just so I could get out of his intoxicating orbit for a few minutes because it's been a struggle not to give in to my basic desires all day. A struggle I’m clearly losing, especially after watching Colin and Luke cook together.

My poor ovaries barely survived that.

The microwave beeps, signally that the popcorn is ready, and I take out the piping hot bag, giving it a shake before dividing it up between the two already partially filled bowls. After stirring in some melted butter, I suck in a confident breath and grab both bowls, steadying myself as I make my way back towards the lounge. When I arrive, Luke is already sprawled out on the floor, tucked into a comfy nest of pillows and thick woolly blankets (his standard setup for any movie night). He’s playing some game on his Nintendo Switch and I notice that he’s changed into the reindeer onesie Colin bought for him as well. It does look adorable on him even if it was ludicrously expensive. I scan the rest of the room, searching for Colin only to frown when I don’t see any sign of him.

Hmm…I wonder where he went?

Schooling my face, I hold one of the bowls of popcorn out to my brother who immediately abandons his game and takes it with a wide smile and ‘thank you’.

“So, did you have lots of fun today?” I ask him, sitting down on the sofa and placing the other bowl on the coffee table in the middle of the room.

“I had so much fun!” Luke replies around a mouthful of half-chewed popcorn, “Colin’s so cool, El. He says that if I’m dedicated enough, I could become a famous rugby player like him one day.”

“Wow, wouldn’t that be amazing if it happened?” I smile, squashing down the urge to correct him, because Colin isn’t famous. Not yet anyway.

This time next year he will be though. He’ll be playing for a Premiership Rugby club and possibly even for England’s international squad. He’ll have lucrative sponsorship deals and a big, fancy house probably. He’ll have a new team and new, important people in his life. Everything he knows will change. Nothing will be the same.

An unexpected pang of panic hits me square in the chest at the thought, but I brush it off quickly.

Luke nods, swallowing more popcorn. “I’ll do it.” He declares boldly, a determined look taking shape in his eyes, “Someday my name will be up there with the best of them!”

“I’m sure it will.”

He’s always been confident even for a ten-year-old and I hope he never loses that .

Smiling, I comb back his unruly hair. “Have you heard from Marco at all?”

The light in Luke’s eyes dims slightly and it shatters my heart when he shakes his head, turning away so I can’t see his disappointment.

Anger flares inside me.

What Marco clearly doesn’t understand or hasn’t realised yet is that I’m not the only one who’s been hurt by our break-up. For years, Luke followed him around everywhere. He idolised Marco, hung onto his every word and practically worshipped the ground he walked on.

I just…

I had hoped that despite everything, Marco would’ve still tried to be there for Luke at least, but he hasn’t followed through on any of the promises he made. Instead, he dumped my little brother as easily as a bag of trash the second our relationship ended just like our father did. Colin, on the other hand, offered to train Luke after only knowing him for less than an hour and then he just did it. No muss, no fuss. That’s the kind of person I want my brother to be around. The kind of person I want him to admire and even aspire to be like one day.

Not someone as disingenuous and pathetic as Marco.

“I’m sorry, Luke.” I stroke the apple of my brother’s cheek, trying to comfort him, but he shrugs, grabbing his Switch again.

“It’s fine,” He says, “I like Colin more anyway.”

I smile crookedly to myself.

I like him more too.

As if saying his name somehow summons him, Colin reappears, freshly showered and dressed in a pair of grey cotton track pants, socks and a white t-shirt. I freeze, allowing my eyes to drag over him from head to toe, as warmth spreads between my legs. I glance down, taking in my black leggings, old beige Henley and mismatched socks, feeling entirely inadequate in comparison.

What is it with men and grey sweats?

And why do they always look so good in them?

Once again, Colin catches me staring and he winks, his own eyes charging with unchecked heat as he takes in every inch of me in return. My face burns and my stomach tightens.

I guess he likes how I look.

We settle in to watch the movie with Luke on the floor while Colin and I opt to take the sofa, which makes me nervous for an entirely new reason because we still haven’t talked about us yet.

Do I give him space or does he want to cuddle maybe?

Would it be weird if we did?

I drape a large, thick blanket over our legs, still internally freaking out about what to do when his arm comes around my waist and he tugs me firmly into his side. A smile touches my lips. I guess that answers that question.

I nestle my head against his warm, solid chest, sliding one arm over his stomach. As the opening sequence of the movie plays, I sigh quietly and snuggle closer, surrounding myself with his fresh, clean scent. Minutes pass, but no discomfort or awkwardness comes. I can’t remember the last time I felt so at ease around someone who isn’t Nat, Liv, or my family. Even cuddling with Marco or any boy I liked before didn’t feel this nice. Colin makes it as easy and as natural as breathing.

Apart from the fact that he’s like a human hot water bottle, I love the way his fingers sneak under the hem of my shirt, tracing lazy patterns against my hip bone and how he brings his mouth down to my ear and whispers little facts about the movie. Like how they used the sound a koala bear makes for the T-Rex’s signature growl and how Spielberg didn’t tell the actors who played Lex and Tim that the T-Rex was going to break through the roof of the car during the famous paddock scene, so their terrified reactions were genuine. I’ve seen Jurassic Park dozens of times. It’s a classic after all, but most big sisters probably wouldn’t expose their innocent brother to a movie that has terrifying dinosaurs eating people in it. Luckily, Luke ends up loving every second of the film, that is until he falls asleep near the end.

Colin and I exchange an amused look before he pauses the movie, allowing me to gather my brother in my arms and carry him upstairs to his room. Once he’s safely tucked in his bed and sound asleep, I make my way back downstairs again, finding Colin exactly where I left him on the sofa, scrolling on his mobile.

I stare at him quietly, thinking about the last twenty-four hours again and how happy they’ve made me. From what happened last night, to watching Luke having so much fun training this morning and at the market. All the heated looks, the way Colin draped his arm over my shoulders and how he kissed me so he could ‘taste’ the fudge I insisted he try.

I didn’t correct him when he introduced himself to Martha as my ‘boyfriend’ even though I probably should’ve, but I’ve been fighting these feelings for so long now that I can’t imagine trying to pretend that I don’t know what it feels like to finally act on them. Experiencing them without having to worry about what will happen or what people might think or say has been cathartic, to say the least.

Which is why we need to talk .

Tentatively, I step forward, drawing Colin’s attention. He glances up, smiling when he sees me.

“Everything all right?” He asks, clicking off his phone and sliding it back into his pocket.

I nod, stopping just short of where he’s sitting on the sofa, my fingers anxiously twisting together.

His brow furrows.

“You okay?” He reaches for me, but I don’t take his outstretched hand. I don’t move at all, in fact.

As much as I’ve enjoyed it, I’m not doing another second of whatever it is we’ve been doing until I know where this is going.

“I think we should talk.”

Working his throat, Colin lowers his hand and nods, a look of mild apprehension filling his eyes. He’s nervous as well. Good. At least I’m not alone. Silence stretches between us and the whole time I’m keenly aware of how my heart has skyrocketed. His eyes are hard to read, so I lower my gaze, trying to organise my thoughts. I have no idea where to even start, so I simply go with the first thing that comes to mind.

“I don’t think I could go back to how things were before.” I tell him honestly, “I don’t regret what happened last night or at the market. It scares me a little because I wasn’t sure how it was going to change things, but earlier today when you introduced yourself to Martha as ‘my boyfriend’, I didn’t correct you or say anything, because I realised …” I pause, drawing in a shaky breath. I can’t believe I’m about to say this , “I realised I liked the way it sounded coming out of your mouth. Because that’s what I want, Colin. I want to be with you. I know that…” Another deep breath. In. Out . “I know I said that I wanted us to just be ‘friends’ and that being a couple would complicate everyth ing because of Marco, the article, your rugby career and your dad and I’ll understand if you don’t want the same thing, but–”

One minute I’m standing in front of him, the next his large hands are on my waist and I’m being pulled down until I’m seated firmly on his lap and my thighs are straddling his hips.

“What –” I hardly get the word out before his mouth crashes against mine in a hard kiss. The kind that steals my breath and makes my toes curl.

We pull apart – God-only-knows-when – my eyes half-lidded and my arms wrapped around his neck.

“Let’s get one thing straight, Simpkins,” Colin murmurs, his lips still moving lightly over mine, “If you think I don’t want that as well, all of that, then you’re dead fucking wrong, love.” His fingers knead into my soft flesh, slowly gliding over my lower back, memorising every inch of my skin. “Don’t you know that I’ve been dying to hear you say that? That I’ve wanted to say the same thing to you as well. Since the day we met, I’ve wanted you like this, Ellie. To hold you and feel you in my hands. To call you mine .”

He whispers those last four words with so much need that I swear I feel them penetrate my very soul.

I gulp down a lungful of air, trying to regulate my breathing.

“Is that what I am?” I ask, my voice just above a whisper, “Yours, I mean?”

His throat bobs, but his unshakable gaze never wavers. “It’s what you’ve always been.”

Heat pulses between my legs and my inner walls clamp lightly because I love the sound of that.

Mine .

I’m his.

I want to hear him say it again and again.

“No one’s ever called me that before,” I admit shyly.

He grins, gently caressing my cheek with the back of his fingers. “No one?”

I shake my head, writhing with anticipation when his eyes turn a dangerously dark and attractive shade of blue. His strong arms circle around me, bringing me in and flattening my body against his. He kisses the base of my throat. Softly at first, his touch is light and barely perceptible, but the action slowly morphs into hot, open-mouthed kisses that send sharp, but wondrous tingles down my spine.

“Would you like me to show you what that means, love?” He asks a warm, throaty edge to his voice now.

Yes, please.

Before I can respond though, he sinks his teeth into the side of my neck lightly, grazing them over my skin and causing waves of goosebumps to spread all over. I gasp under my breath and my head tilts back, granting him more access as he nibbles and sucks, teasing the same spot at an agonisingly slow pace.

“Simpkins?” He probes, still waiting for a reply.

Not trusting myself to speak, I answer him with a vigorous nod, barely holding back a desperate, guttural moan and my sanity when his hands cup my ass, squeezing the cheeks between his fingers and pressing me down onto the noticeable bulge in his pants.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

“Words, Ellie.” Colin murmurs, still languidly feasting on the hallow of my throat, “Give me your words, love. Tell me exactly what you need. ”

My aching pussy throbs again. It’s obvious what I need, but then I remember what he told me last night.

I set the pace. I decide what we’ll do and how far we’ll go.

There are so many things I want to try, but only one thing comes to mind now.

I move my hands to the sides of his face, pulling him back and immediately lowering my lips to his, kissing him slowly and sensually this time.

“I want to return the favour from last night,” I whisper, my voice unrecognisable even to my own ears because of how thickly it's laced with desire. Holding his eyes, I drop my hand down to his strained cock and palm it, relishing in the low hiss that escapes him, “And I want you to show me how, please .”

Colin

E ither I’m already dead or I’m very close to dying because I haven’t been able to breathe properly for the last five minutes.

When Ellie came downstairs and I saw the anxious look in her eyes, I knew what was coming before she even said the words.

I think we should talk.

I’d spent the entire day agonising over the fact that we still hadn’t spoken about last night, but kept reminding myself that the right moment to talk would come soon enough. Actually being confronted with that ‘moment’ however, filled me with more dread and nerves than I’ve ever experienced before in my life and that’s say ing something given the pressure I’m often put under when I play rugby. It was easy to pretend that last night was all part of the plan and that Ellie and I always intended for it to happen.

Now I was preparing myself for the inevitable.

Maybe even the end.

Then she blew my fucking mind instead by pouring her heart out to me, allowing that suffocating weight that’s been sitting on my shoulders to finally fuck off and vanish.

She wants me to be her boyfriend.

She wants me. Period.

I swear, this girl is in a league of her own. Other girls like Kiera Blake and Nicole Dempsey don’t hold a fucking candle to her. She’s kind and thoughtful. Smart and resourceful. Funny and beautiful and a lot stronger than she thinks she is. Believe me when I say I’ve never wanted to belong to someone more. I’m completely gone for her already, which is why when she reaches down and brushes those slim fingers of hers over my rock-hard dick, begging me with the softest ‘please’ I’ve ever heard in my life to show her how she can bring me to release, I nearly come on the spot, because fuck me…

I adore it when she’s shy, but I fucking love it when she shows her confidence as well.

“Ellie.” Her name tumbles from my lips in a strained whisper as she moves her hand past the waistband of my sweats and wraps it lightly around my cock, barely stroking the sensitive skin.

Fuck. Her touch alone nearly sets me on fire.

“Tell me what to do, Colin,” She murmurs in a soft, sultry voice that caresses my ears like honey. She kisses my forehead, my cheeks, my jaw and finally my lips, “ Please. ”

Fucking ‘ please ’ again.

Who the fuck am I to deny her?

I close my eyes, breathing heavily through clenched teeth. “Tighter. Grip me a little tighter.”

She listens, tightening her hold as instructed, but I can tell she’s struggling with the restriction caused by my sweats, so I lift my hips with her still in my lap, just enough to tug them down my thighs slightly, giving her more room to work with. Her beautiful eyes lower and immediately widen with awe and a little trepidation as well as she stares at the thick girth of my bare cock. I follow her gaze and I swear, the image of her delicate hand wrapped around me will be burnt into my brain forever. I cup the back of her neck and pull her in, kissing her until I feel her nerves start to dissipate. She starts to move her hand then, innocently and with uncertainty at first, but that doesn’t stop me from tilting my head back and groaning loudly.

Just the feel of her is enough to elicit a reaction out of me.

I reach down and cover her hand with mine, giving her the guidance she asked for, and with every brush and stroke I can sense her confidence starting to grow along with the searing heat and unchecked pleasure threatening to flood my insides at any moment.

“Fuck, that’s it, love.” I grit out, shivering at the unreal sensation of having her hands on me, because fuck it’s been so long, “Just like that.”

She leans forward, her lips finding my throat as she kisses softly, sucking and biting with purpose, leaving a mark on my skin and spreading fire in her wake. I groan when she nibbles on my earlobe, grinding her hips down on my lap. Shit. I remove my hand entirely, letting her take control and…fuck me, she doesn’t disappoi nt, swiping the pre-cum off my tip with her thumb and adding a little twist to her wrist every time she runs her hand down the length of my cock. What nearly drives me completely insane though is the look on her face when I open my eyes again – fascination, desire, lust. All of it aimed at me. She’s beautiful like this. A vision of epic proportions and if I died right now, at least I’d know that I had this moment with her just once. I cradle the back of her head with my hand, fingers tangling in her hair as I tug her down and capture her lips again. It’s deep and devastating.

It’s us .

I want her to experience this with me as well so when my other hand slides past the waist of her leggings, finding her bare pussy warm and fucking soaking for me already, the soft gasp of surprise she releases almost serves as my undoing.

“C-Colin.”

I brush over her centre and Ellie moans, air from her lungs stuttering against my lips as she squirms from the friction of my fingers on her clit.

If she wants more, I’ll give my girl whatever she wants.

Our mouths clash together again fiercely, almost feverishly and she picks up her pace, matching it with mine as I start rubbing quick, tight circles against her swollen flesh.

“So, fucking perfect,” I praise, “Look at you working my cock like a good girl while I make you fall apart with my hand. Does this turn you on, love? Me touching you? You touching me?”

“Yes.” She nods, panting against my mouth and rocking her hips against my hand like a fucking goddess. When she runs her nails down the underside of my dick and unexpectedly cradles my balls in her hand, giving them a light squeeze, I hiss low in the back of my th roat, my body jerking. “I like how big you are,” She confesses breathlessly, tonguing my lips, “And how hot you feel in my hand. I can’t wait to have you inside me.”

Holy fuck!

I asked for her words and fuck she’s not holding back anymore.

At this rate, she’s going be the death of me.

Burying my face into the crook of her neck, I continue to work her clit with my thumb as I slip a finger inside her tight heat followed by another, groaning when her walls clench around me instantly. She’s so silky and soft, wet and warm and the way she whimpers, clutching herself to me like I’m her lifeline makes her easily the hottest thing I’ve ever had.

I’ll never want anyone else again.

Only her.

“Oh god, Colin…I’m…”

I know, love. I know.

She’s close. So am I and for a moment the only sounds I can hear are our moans of pleasure mixed with our heavy breathing as we gradually build towards our combined releases.

“Fall with me,” I hear her beg, her hand around me tightening, “Please! Come with me, Colin.”

“Fuck, Ellie…I…”

That’s all the warning I manage to get out before my vision suddenly turns to white and an intense heat rockets up my spine. I stiffen, groaning with an almost animalistic need as bursts of hot cum shoot out of cock and into her palm. She shatters apart not even a second later, whimpering and crying out against my shoulder as her body shakes and spasms above me beautifully. I hold h er to me, delirious and weightless at the same time. Her lips brush across my cheek, finding mine again as her fingers run through my hair, kissing me in a slow, unhurried fashion.

I melt into her and everything she is.

Gorgeous.

Perfect.

And mine.

All fucking mine.

She’s a part of me now.

We sit there in silence, kissing and breathing heavily for a few seconds before I slip my hand out of her leggings and grab the blanket, using it to clean the mess I left off her hand. I keep my eyes trained on the task, but I can feel hers boring into me.

“Colin?”

“Yes?”

She sounds out of breath still, her forehead damp with sweat as she rests it lazily against mine. I can still sense her shyness, but there’s a growing boldness about her that’s starting to outweigh it. When she leans back slightly, looking at me with a lethal mixture of beauty, innocence and desire, I’m not at all prepared for the next words that come out of her mouth.

“Take me upstairs, please.”

I still.

What?

Every breath of air in my lungs dissolves and it takes my brain longer than it should to process such a simple request.

Okay, I’m definitely dead now because there’s no possible way, I’d survive the rest of the night if we ended up doing this. I brush her hair back of f her face, making sure to search her eyes carefully.

“Are you sure?” I ask. She knows she doesn’t have to do this. There’s no pressure, but she nods her head, kissing me with so much passion and care I nearly lose myself.

“I want you, Colin Hunt,” She murmurs, “Just you.”

I tremble beneath her, fighting for air, the sound of her voice making my dick start to thicken all over again.

Christ, this girl will be my undoing and I’ll willingly let her be.

I stand abruptly, enjoying the soft squeal that leaves her as I wrap her legs securely around my waist and start walking towards the stairs, sealing my mouth over hers deeply and with just as much care as she showed.

Seven words, that’s all it took to cast me completely under her spell.

Honestly?

I never stood a chance and neither did she.