Page 13

Colin

Two months later

“ I see your shadow isn’t here today.”

I grunt, lifting the weighted bar before carefully bringing it back down to my chest again.

“Firstly,” I pause, breathing as I extend my arms again and lift it, “Her name is Ellie and secondly, you’re supposed to be spotting for me, not looking for her.”

“I am spotting for you,” Mace insists, grabbing the centre of the bar with both hands and helping me place it back on the rack after I finish my last rep, “I’m just saying, it’s always a good day whenever Simpkie is around.”

I grimace, sitting up straight on the bench and grabbing my water bottle. “Don’t call her that.”

It’s bad enough he’s taken to calling her ‘my shadow’, but I despise that other nickname with a burning passion. Even more than ‘Collie’. Based on his shit-eating grin, the bastard knows it too.

“Why? She doesn’t seem to mind it.”

Yeah? Well, I fucking do mind.

I send him a warning look and Mace chuckles, surrendering by handing me a fresh towel. I clear the sweat from my face, arms and h ands, wiping down the bench as well before I stand up and we exchange positions.

“So, where is she?” He asks, lying down.

I ignore the question and add some weight to the bar instead, double-checking each end to make sure they’re on securely before I help him lift it. He starts pumping his arms and I watch him closely, making sure he doesn’t favour his left side like he tends to do sometimes.

“Well?” He urges when I don’t say anything.

I suppress a sigh.

I had a feeling this was going to happen.

Two weeks ago, when I finally caved and allowed the lads to meet Ellie one afternoon after practice, I knew I’d made a horrible mistake. If I thought them not being able to shut up about her was bad before, I was sorely mistaken. Now whenever they see Ellie they drop whatever they’re supposed to be doing and flock around her like a bunch of doe-eyed idiots. It’s only mildly irritating at best, especially since Ellie doesn’t seem to mind all the attention like I had hoped she would.

At least they don’t bother trying to flirt with her anymore and I’m not the least bit ashamed to admit some of them had to learn that lesson from me the hard way.

“Hello? Earth to Colin!”

I roll my eyes and help Mace set the bar back on the rack, tossing him a fresh towel once he’s finished. “She had stuff to do.”

Ellie’s only been to two of my gym sessions since she started following me around and while I could tell she enjoyed watching me workout both times (though she adorably tried to pretend she wasn’t openly gawking at me) I could also tell it was mind-numbingly borin g for her. So, once she got some pictures and made the observations she needed, we agreed she didn’t have to come back unless she really felt like it.

“So, what? You’re not seeing her today?”

I smirk.

Well now, I didn’t say that, did I?

Mace narrows his eyes, but I don’t say anything, intentionally keeping my answer vague as I pop the cap on my water bottle and take two big sips.

What?

He doesn’t need to know I’m heading straight to her place as soon as I’m done here and I’m not in the mood for his shit today anyway. It’s bad enough coming from my teammates, who love to pull my leg every chance they get about being chosen as the subject of the Armitage Spotlight, but my best mate has a special brand of teasing that either makes you want to laugh with him or strangle him. Mostly the latter. Slinging my towel around the back of my neck, I head towards the treadmills next and hop onto one, setting it to a speed suitable for jogging. I barely start moving though before Mace leans his bicep against the wall in front of me, his eyes scanning me from head to toe like I’m some perplexing enigma he’s trying to solve.

“Something on your mind, darling?” I ask pointedly.

“Oh nothing, honey. I’m just trying to figure out if there’s something going on between you and Simpkie.”

“Stop calling her that,” I snap, “And it’s none of your business.”

A cheeky smile lifts the corners of his mouth and he winks, the fucker actually winks. “Ah, so that’s a definitive ‘yes’ then, isn’t it mate? ”

“No, it’s a definitive ‘none of your business’, mate .” Jesus, why the hell did I think it was a good idea to leave my Bluetooth headphones in my locker again? “We’re just friends, all right.”

“Friends?” He snorts, a mixture of disbelief and amusement flittering into his eyes, “You’re joking?”

I shake my head, kicking the speed on the treadmill up a notch faster.

“Hmm, I don’t know Col, I’ve heard a fair amount of bullshit in my life and that sounds an awful lot like more of it.”

But it’s not bullshit though.

That’s exactly what Ellie and I are now; ‘friends’ and curiously, I don’t hate it as much as I thought I would.

I definitely don’t love it either though.

A year ago – hell six months ago – if someone had told me that my favourite part of the day would be the time I spend with a girl who I’m just friends with, I would’ve bulked over laughing.

I’ve never been ‘just friends’ with a girl. With a girl, I like anyway, but I can’t say that’s true.

Not anymore.

It’s been two months since that evening when I went over to her house and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about how differently that visit played out compared to what I had actually planned on doing. My intentions were strictly non-sexual going in. All I wanted to do was find out why she was avoiding me and how I could fix that. I didn’t expect it to lead to Ellie confessing that she likes me or for her to call me out on liking her and I certainly didn’t expect that heated make-out session against her bedroom door or that she would stop us in the middle of it, ask ing if we could just be friends for a while.

I won’t lie, that knocked the wind out of my sails a little bit.

Not to sound like a cocky bastard or anything, but I’ve never had a girl stop me from kissing her before, but true to form, Ellie continues to surprise me and what’s worse is I can’t even be upset with her about it, because she did make some excellent points.

I completely understand that she needed time to work through her relationship with that dickhead Andersen falling apart, but while I do agree that this season is important and I’m touched by her desire to see me succeed, I still don’t get how us being together would be this massive distraction everyone’s convinced it would be. However, even if I could change her mind on that we’d still have to contend with my father and if he ever caught wind of us dating it would be catastrophic at best. Which is exactly why I benched my cock in the first place. I swear the little shit has a mind of his own though, because the amount of ‘personal’ time I’ve had to devote to him in the shower lately is pathetically embarrassing.

Bottom line?

This whole situation sucks, but I don’t have much of a choice either, so like it or not, I have to go along with it. The best thing I can do now is pour myself into rugby and enjoy the moments I get with her.

“It’s a bad time,” I explain in between measured breaths, “I need to focus on playing well if I want this deal with The Knights to go through and besides, Ellie’s writing this whole article thing on me, remember? ”

“Okay fair, but since when has anything like that stopped you from shagging a girl before?”

He’s got me there.

I’ve never been as frivolous as him or Bryce, but I can’t deny that past me wouldn’t have been phased by any of that. I probably would’ve found a way to convince her not to be either by now.

“It’s different this time.”

This whole situation is different.

“Different?” Mace questions. “Really?”

“Yeah, really. My contract with the Knights is practically a done deal, but I still need to earn it by proving myself on the field, but it’s more than that. Ellie isn’t just some girl I want to shag. She’s…”

“Oi Madsen!” Vinnie, our assistant coach suddenly yells from where he’s standing on the edge of the gym, scrutinising us all like a hawk. “This isn’t fucking Gossip Girls, stop gabbing away, get your ass on a machine and get moving! Keep up that pace Hunt!”

“Yes, coach!” Mace yells back, jumping to attention so quickly I expect him to salute.

I snicker under my breath and my friend casts a dirty look my way, climbing onto the treadmill next to mine and starting to jog.

“It’s not fucking funny,” He gripes under his breath, “That man is terrifying. Even more so than your dad.”

True.

I don’t think anyone on the team would disagree with that statement.

Vinnie’s a great assistant coach and he’s not incapable of seeing the effort you put in and praising you for it, but there’s a reason why he and my f ather are best friends, why they’ve been working together for more than a decade now and why you definitely don’t want to get on his bad side.

Thank God it’s not his wrath I’d have to deal with if Ellie and I started dating and it got out.

Dating.

That’s the second time I’ve used that word while thinking about her.

Is that what I want? To date her?

Not too long ago, the idea would’ve put me off instantly. Now I can’t seem to think of a reason why it should. I give my head a firm shake, close my eyes and push that line of thinking aside, focusing instead on keeping up my pace as Vinnie instructed.

Even if dating her is what I want, it’s the one thing I can’t have.

“ Y ou can’t be serious?”

“And yet I am.”

“Colin!”

“Ellie?”

I smirk playfully and she glares at me, like full-on glares, and it takes more effort than I anticipate not to burst out laughing.

Fuck, she’s adorable.

“I’m sorry, there’s no way you can honestly think Two Towers is better than Fellowship of the Ring.” She says, shaking her head disbelievingly. “There are so many iconic moments; the Nazgul hunt ing Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin. Aragon tricking the Nazgul in Bree. Weathertop. Arwen taking Frodo to Rivendell and getting chased by the Nazgul, which is supposed to be Glorfindel I know, but it’s still amazing! Saruman’s betrayal. The entire Moria sequence. Boromir’s sacrifice at Amon Hen. Aragon’s fight with Lurtz!”

“Yes, yes, there’s no denying that those are iconic moments or that Fellowship isn’t an outstanding movie, Simpkins, but Two Towers will always have one thing over Fellowship; Helms Deep.”

Ellie lets out a groan, covering her face with her arms as she flops back onto her pillows.

I smirk.

She knows I’m right. Any self-respecting Lord of The Rings fan will agree that the Battle of Helms Deep is easily one of the greatest moments in the entire trilogy.

“Not to mention there’s also Gandalf fighting the Balrog in the beginning,” I continue, “Aragon, Gimli and Legolas tracking the Uruk-hai to save Merry and Pippin. The Rohirrim killing the Uruk-hai during the night. Gandalf returning as Gandalf the White. The fight against the Warg riders. The Ents revenge on Saruman. Faramir doing what his Boromir couldn’t do and resisting the ring. Sam’s speech –”

“– Okay, okay you’ve made your point. Two Towers is incredible.” She mumbles, grumpily pursing her lips when her arms drop down to her sides, “I still love Fellowship more though.”

I chuckle warmly, settling beside her against the comfy pillows as well.

We’re lying on her bed in her room, currently in the middle of trying to decide what movie to watch. When I suggested The Lord of the Rings, i t was a joke really. I kind of expected Ellie to scrunch her nose up and say she didn’t like fantasy movies or that they’re too long; a comment I’ve gotten from a few girls in the past. I certainly didn’t expect her to be a massive fan or that we would end up having a mini argument about which film is the best in the trilogy. I won’t lie, seeing the fiery look burning in her hazel green eyes from how impassioned she got made it incredibly hard not to haul her into my lap and kiss her senselessly.

Who knew listening to a girl talk about The Lord of the Rings would be such a turn-on?

My dick twitched so many times during that entire conversation that I fucking lost count.

“Well, at least we can both agree that the Rohirrim’s charge at Pelennor is the most epic moment of all time, right?” She says.

Be still my beating heart.

My cock jerks again and I swallow, subtly adjusting my semi-hard on. “Now you’re talking my love language, Simpkins.”

She giggles softly, a beautiful smile breaking out over her lips and it’s moments like these where I wonder why I ever agreed to just be her friend.

Because I care about her and her well-being more than I’ve cared about anyone outside my family before.

Right.

That’s why.

Besides being her friend hasn’t been that bad.

Torturous? Yes, but not that bad.

Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to keep it up for as long as I have, but I can’t ignore how it’s made her more comfortable around me so I’m willing to suffer through it, especially if it means getting to know her better.

That’s what she hasn’t realised yet.

While she’s been asking questions and making observations about me, I’ve been making some observations of my own. Like how she always puts fresh basil on every Italian dish she has but especially likes it on a Margherita pizza. She likes to lick the icing off a cupcake before she eats the rest of it. Her favourite colour is green – forest green to be precise. She loves Snow Patrol ; her favourite song by them is The Symphony and judging by its heavily cracked spine and the fact that it’s always on her bedside table, her favourite book is Far from The Madding Crowd by Thomas Hardy. She hates coffee. Doesn’t like horror movies except for The Conjuring films. She’s always up for a good romance, action or comedy though. She smells of jasmine because of the perfume she likes to wear and she has a habit of picking the slices of tomato off a burger or sandwich before she eats it.

A smile touches my lips thinking about that last one, because I do the same thing as well.

Every time I discover something new about her, like how she’s a total Lord of the Rings nerd, I latch onto it immediately and lock it away somewhere safe so I won’t forget it. I wonder if she does the same thing whenever she learns something new about me. I hope she does. I know she only needs to know these things for the article, but I wish I knew if she gets just as much satisfaction as I do whenever she learns something new about me.

We’ve been spending nearly all of our free time together just lately; it’ll be strange not being around her when Winter break starts .

I’m still stuck in my thoughts when the doorbell rings downstairs.

“That’ll be the food we ordered. Would you mind getting it?” Ellie asks, getting up and heading for the loo.

“Yeah, no problem.” With a sigh, I climb off the bed as well.

As soon as I step outside her room, I smile as I take in my surroundings again. The first time I saw this place, I’ll admit I was surprised. It’s nice. Really nice. The rooms are spacious, but not too big, tastefully finished with wood and nicely furnished as well. The beige carpeting that covers the floors, except in the kitchen and bathrooms, makes it feel even cosier inside as well. My favourite aspect though is the framed photographs hanging on the walls. They’re all landscapes of bright green pastures stretching as far as the eye can see or rugged mountains towering into the sky. Close-ups of mossy rocks. Fields of colourful flowers and clusters of old trees, the kind found in ancient forests. I still remember how deeply Ellie blushed when I complimented her on them.

All in all, it’s leaps and bounds better than the student dorms or anything you could get closer to campus. My first thought was that it must be expensive, especially for three university students, but when Ellie explained that Natalie’s father owns the place it all made sense. Much like the cottage, which has been in my family for years now, I’d rather live somewhere rent-free than in a cramped dorm room or an overpriced apartment.

On a normal night, there would be a lot more activity happening, but Liv and Natalie aren’t here for once and the significance of that isn’t lost on me. Every time I’ve come over before, they’ve been h oovering nearby, keeping a close eye on Ellie and me.

Well, mostly on me.

I’m pretty sure Liv likes me. Scratch that, I know she does, but I also get the feeling she won’t hesitate to hurt me if I do or say something to deserve it. She’s a spitfire, that’s for sure. Natalie, on the other hand, has been polite and friendly, but I also get the impression she’s a little guarded and protective as well. Especially around Ellie. Most guys probably wouldn’t like being so heavily scrutinised, but I think it’s great that Ellie has two friends who care about her so much. The fact that they’ve left us alone tonight must be a good sign, right?

Maybe they’re starting to trust me.

Either that or Ellie told them they’re both being ridiculous.

It’s progress in any case.

After collecting the pizza, I quickly pop into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water for myself and a can of Sprite for Ellie from the fridge before heading back upstairs. I’m just outside her half-closed bedroom door, about to push it open with my foot when I hear her voice filter through the small gap.

“No, no, I’m still coming.”

I pause. Is she on the phone with someone?

“Yes, I’m sure,” Ellie says before she falls silent, speaking again a few moments later, “I appreciate your concern, Mum, but I really don’t care that Marco’s going to be there as well.”

Marco?

Be there as well?

My eyebrows pull together and my hackles rise.

What the fuck are they talking about ?

I flatten my lips, feeling something uncomfortable twist its way through me. The idea of Ellie being anywhere near that fucker again doesn’t sit well with me at all. Another stretch of silence passes and I lean in closer to the door, wishing I could hear more of the conversation.

“I know.” Ellie sighs quietly. Defeatedly, “But you don’t have to worry, I’m positive everything will be fine. I’ll call before I leave, okay?”

Leave?

Are they talking about her coming home for Winter break?

But what the fuck does Marco have to do with that?

I nudge the door open then and Ellie’s eyes widen a touch, flicking over to me so quickly it feels like I’ve just caught her in the middle of doing something naughty.

“I uh – I have to go, Mum.” There’s another pause before she smiles warmly at whatever she hears over the phone, “I love you too and tell Luke I love him as well. I’ll see you soon.”

They finish saying their goodbyes just as I set the pizzas down on the bed.

“Sorry, that was my Mum,” Ellie says, hopping back onto the mattress and immediately reaching for one of the boxes. She opens it, a wide, toothy grin curling on her lips when she sees that it’s her favourite; Margherita with fresh basil.

I smile discreetly to myself.

Yup.

Definitely worth it.

I sit down as well and grab the other pizza which has my favourite toppings on it; pineapple and bacon. She scrunches her nose at the sight, taking her first bite .

“I still can’t believe you like pineapple on pizza. You know they’d skin you alive for that in Italy?”

I shrug, grinning playfully and taking a hearty bite as well. “Sticks and stones, Simpkins.”

She rolls her eyes at me and I hand her the Sprite, twisting the cap off my water.

“Is everything alright with your Mum?” I ask.

“Everything’s fine. She just wanted to make sure I’m still coming home for Christmas.”

“Oh,” I swallow my mouthful of food, “Were you thinking about not going?”

Am I playing dumb? Yes.

Am I itching to ask her why Marco came up? Also yes.

Do I want to admit I was eavesdropping on her phone call like some creep? No.

Probably better to let her tell me and only if she wants to.

“The idea did cross my mind actually, not because I don’t want to see my family or anything, but because I…” She trails off and I sit quietly, waiting for her to explain further, hating the tentative and resigned look she gives me when she meets my eyes. “You know, Marco?” I nod, my grip around my water tightening at the mention of his fucking name, “We’re both from the same town, which means he’ll be there as well.”

“You’re fucking joking?” Despite my incredulous tone, laughter bubbles its way out of her, but it’s hollow. Humourless.

“Believe me, I wish I was. Normally it wouldn’t be a problem, because Liv and Nat are from Heathton as well, but they’re going away with their families to Europe this year so they won’t be there.” Ellie works her throat, absently picking the basil off a slice of her pizza, “It’s not even that I’m worried about seeing him again. I’d rather not obviously, but I don’t know…Seeing him with Nicole would be…”

She grimaces and my hand flexes around the bottle a tad more. Any more pressure and I’ll crush it.

“How do you know she will be there?”

“I don’t,” Ellie replies, “But I saw a picture of him with her sitting on his lap that was taken recently so I can only imagine she will be. ”

My nostrils flare.

You know, I can absolutely picture that worthless piece of shit bringing Nicole home, just to spite Ellie. It’s bad enough that she had to block him because he kept trying to call her.

Is this the reason why?

“My Mum said that I don’t have to come, that’s what we were talking about, but I want to see her and my brother again. It’s not an ideal situation obviously, but it’s fine,” She shrugs half-heartedly, “It’s only for ten days.”

Ten days!

She’s going to suffer through the humiliation of having to watch Marco Andersen flaunt Nicole Dempsey around on his arm for ten whole fucking days!

My jaw hardens, to the point that it’s almost painful. Ellie must notice because she offers me a reassuring smile and her delicate fingers slide over my tense forearm a second later.

“I’ll be okay, Colin. I’ll just avoid him.”

I shake my head. “That’s not the fucking point, Ellie.”

Normally I wouldn’t get so involved in someone else's personal life or make such a scene, but this isn’t a normal situation. This isn’t just anybody. This is Ellie and I don’t think I could stomach it knowing that while I’m lounging on a beach in the South of France getting a sun tan, she’s being forced to watch her ex rub his new relationship in her face. What if he threatens her again and no one is there to stop it this time?

I couldn’t bear that.

“I know,” Ellie says calmly, trying to ease my brewing anger, “But I’m not going to avoid seeing my family because of him either so there’s nothing we can do about it.”

Isn’t there?

The wheels in my head start turning, forming an idea, and before I can think better of it, the words spill out of my mouth.

“What if I came with you?”

Ellie’s eyes widen and she blanches, shocked. “What?”

Yeah, what the fuck did I just say?

I should take the idea back immediately and pretend I didn’t just say the most ludicrous thing imaginable, but the thought of letting her go to Surrey knowing that she’s going to be embarrassed and undermined by her tosspot of an ex at every turn seems just as maddening to me, if not more so.

So, I square my shoulders, meeting her stare head-on.

“What if I came home with you,” I say again, completely serious this time.

She blinks. Once, twice, three times. Completely floored.

“Y-you want to come home with me?” She repeats, giving her head a shake, “Colin, that’s completely –”

“– Insane?” I finish for her, “Yeah, I know.”

“Then why would you suggest it?”

“Because you’re my friend and I want to help you.”

And I mean that.

I may want more, but if friendship is all I’m allowed to offer her right now then I’m going to be the best fucking friend she’s ever had. Her happiness. Her wellbeing. All of it matters to me now and anyone who knows me well knows I will go above and beyond to make sure nothing disrupts that. I’m not doing this so I can feel good about myself or so I can one-up Marco in some petty way. Would it be brilliant to see the dumb look on his face if he saw us together?

Abso-fucking-lutely.

But the main reason why I want to do this is because somewhere along the way Ellie Simpkins snuck up on me and became important. She got under my skin and I’ll be damned before I sit back and watch her get hurt again.

“You don’t need to do this, Colin.” She murmurs, her gaze downcast, looking anywhere but at me. “I appreciate it, but I can take care of myself. I don’t want you to feel like you need to protect me just because we’re friends.”

I shake my head, smirking.

This girl.

“Don’t you see, Simpkins? That’s exactly why I’m doing this; because we’re friends. We both know this situation is fucked up. It’s fucking disgusting, actually. Not to mention disrespectful and humiliating as well and I’m sorry, but I don’t like the idea of you being mistreated again. In fact, I can’t fucking stand it.” I reach for her hand, gently lacing our fingers together. “I know you can look after yourself, Ellie. I don’t doubt that you can, but I still want to be there for you, just in case you need me.”

Slowly, her eyes lift, meeting mine again.

They’re uncertain. Indecisive and for what feels like an eternity, she sits there, looking between the adamant expression on my face and our linked hands. Hesitancy washes over her features and with every second that passes I think she’s going to withdraw and say something like ‘Thanks for the offer, but I’ll be fine.’

But then she yields with a soft sigh, giving my fingers a tight squeeze.

“Okay.”