Page 14 of Third Time is the Charm (Passion and Perseverance #3)

“So, what do you think Beth? Lydia? Isn’t it wonderful?” she continued right where she had left off. “It’s going to be the most talked about event of the season, I just know it. Of course,” she paused. “I’m sure it will be nothing like the Hollywood parties that your Mr. Dempsey is quite used to.”

Beth rolled her eyes; her mother’s focus of excitement clearly struggling to center on either Jane’s wedding or McDreamy’s brother as her date.

She didn’t even bother to try to explain again that Colin wasn’t a movie star and therefore, wasn’t a part of any of those parties.

Irene wanted to believe what she wanted to believe.

And sometimes, it was just better to let it go that way.

“Oh,” her mother started, assaulted by a thought. “What about Mr. Darcy? I could have sworn he had a thing for you, Beth. I hope you having a date doesn’t upset him, after all, we wouldn’t be –” Jane quickly cut her mother off, obscuring the train of thought.

“When does Col get here? I should have asked sooner, Beth, I’m sorry. Will he be at dinner tonight?” Jane asked fervently, piquing Beth’s curiosity as to what their mother had been about to reveal that Jane didn’t want her to know.

This was another thing she didn’t miss about the city and her family – all the secrets.

It didn’t matter; if it had to do with Darcy, she didn’t care, she couldn’t.

“He’s actually not getting in until early tomorrow morning, unfortunately.

We have a big event coming up; it’s a miracle that he even took off this weekend to come down here with me, really,” Beth answered, thinking about how true what she said was.

Col had so many other important things that he could…

and probably should be doing, and yet, he was taking time away from his center – his baby – to be here with her.

“Oh, Beth,” Irene exclaimed, her eyes wide as they climbed back into the car.

“That must mean he really likes you! This is wonderful! Can you imagine – Charles Bingley for one son-in-law and Colin Dempsey for another!” Beth clenched her teeth as her mother practically squealed.

“Oh, and of course my dear George, Lydia, my very first son-in-law.”

Beth’s eyes darted to Lydia, sitting quietly on the other side of the back seat rubbing her stomach absentmindedly, her blank stare focused firmly outside the window completely oblivious to what their mother had said – either that or she was purposely ignoring it.

The old Lydia would have jumped the second Mrs. Bennet had excluded George from her initial statement, begging for the attention to be back on her.

Now, this Lydia was squished as far into the corner of the car as possible, determined to try and get as far away from this conversation as she possibly could; if only their mother would let her go that easily.

“Lydia? Dear, don’t be upset with me. I said that Geor—” Irene persisted, having no perception into what her daughter was actually feeling, until Beth cut in, willingly martyring herself to keep George out of the discussion and Lydia’s secret, and pain, sequestered.

“Mom, Colin said he’s very excited to meet you, I just wanted to let you know and ask that you please be on your best behavior; please don’t say anything embarrassing about me,” Beth blurted out, cringing at everything that she’d just said, especially knowing that it would set off giant red warning lights in Jane’s head that there was something wrong with Lydia since Beth would never otherwise utter such things.

It had been the start of a very tortuously long, twenty-minute ride back to the Castle Hotel, filled with lots of deep breaths and fake smiles. But, at least Lydia had been spared.

“All done, Beth.” Jane’s voice drew her back to the present, away from the events of earlier that afternoon.

Frustratingly, she hadn’t had another chance to talk to Lydia alone since they’d gotten back exactly when they needed to start getting ready for the evening.

Disappointingly for Jane as well, since Irene refused to leave Jane’s side, preventing her from asking Beth what was going on with their younger sister; their mother even had Mr. Bennet bring her dress for the evening over to her daughter’s room so that she could get ready there.

Beth had put on sweats and came to Jane’s suite to ask for her help with her hair and makeup – the four months of not caring only making her dismal skills in those areas that much worse.

She hadn’t realized that Irene was going to be there the entire time.

As much as she wanted to stay with Jane, she needed a break from their mother.

So, with her hair and makeup done, Beth made sure her sister was ok before insisting, with apologetic eyes, that she needed to go back to her own room to finish getting ready.

She really just needed a moment alone. First, what had happened this afternoon, and now, the imminent situation of seeing Darcy again – it was an informational and emotional overload.

Leaving the bridal suite barefoot and in her sleeping t-shirt and yoga pants, she quietly padded down the hall to where her room was located, in the older section of the castle.

She bit her lip, knowing that Colin’s room had to be in the newer section of the castle, on the other side of the reception area, since he’d been a last-minute addition.

Nearing the end of the hallway, she rounded the corner to where hers and one other room were left; she rounded the corner and her legs came to a screeching halt, as though she’d run into a wall.

She had.

It was a wall layered with bricks of need, of anger, of hurt, of passion, of memories, of love, and of loss.

It was a wall of Darcy.

“Hello, Beth,” he said calmly, the deep smoothness of his voice spreading over her, bringing goosebumps to every inch of her skin; the sound evoking far, far too many memories of things she’d rather forget.

Of course, he would have the room across from hers. Of freaking course.

“Hello,” she responded hoarsely, hating her voice for advertising her weakness.

Her gaze trapped on him; he was still the most beautiful man she’d ever seen – nothing had changed that.

Beth felt hot and cold at the same time, as though she was blushing, yet like all the blood was draining from her face.

Like her emotions, her body seemed at complete odds with how to respond to seeing him.

“How are you?” he asked politely, his key in the doorknob, but his hand paused from turning the handle while he spoke to her. He looked at her as though one false move would make her disappear; his face poorly concealing the pain of seeing her again, and so unexpectedly, too.

“I’m fine,” she responded more confidently, her annoyance with herself powering her steady tone. She didn’t want to return the question, but the words left her mouth of their own volition, drawn to him from deep inside of her. “How about you?”

The corner of his lips twitched up in a poor attempt at a smile, his eyes boring into hers and she knew that he wanted nothing more than to take her, pull her into his room, and have his way with her.

And just like that, the look was gone, his gaze back on the inanimate door in front of him, a brief glance back to her showed his old mask, the old Darcy, was back in place.

“It was good seeing you, Beth. I’ll see you later,” he said, completely composed before he disappeared into his room, the door shutting behind him punctuating the curtness of his words.

Beth walked numbly to her door, fumbling to get her key into the handle, relieved when she crossed the threshold and closed the door behind her. Sagging back against the solid wood for support she tried to calm her racing heart from the myriad of emotions that were trying to overwhelm it.

This was not how she’d planned on seeing him after all this time. This was not how she’d planned on confronting him after everything that he’d done.

No, she hadn’t expected to run into him in the hallway outside of her… no, outside of both of their rooms. Beth groaned, wondering what a dangerous position the proximity put them in.

Jane was right, he did look different and he acted differently, too.

Being able to see the pain he felt on seeing her etched into his face had shocked her.

Where had his unbreakable mask gone? It had eventually shown up, but it was nothing like the immediate, flick-of-a-switch ability to turn himself off like he’d had before.

The old Darcy probably would have just nodded at her without a word, and left her standing in his callous wake.

He’d tried to be cordial – or as cordial as he was capable of being.

There was still that distance, the aloofness that surrounded him, but now it was a struggle for him to maintain it.

This wasn’t the Darcy she had met at the Gala; this wasn’t the Darcy she had abandoned her entire life because of four months ago; this was something new.

Pushing herself off from against the door, Beth walked over to the closet to get out her of dress. She needed to finish getting ready; they were leaving in fifteen minutes.

Pulling on her simple, gray sheath dress, with the only thing exciting about it being the deep V-neck in the front, Beth took a look at herself in the floor-length closet mirror.

Maybe it was a good thing she’d run into Darcy like she had.

She almost now felt a relief of all the expectations that she’d had on seeing him again in such a public and important setting. She didn’t know what to expect from herself – whether it would be rage, or sadness, or pain, or worse… longing.

It had been all, and yet none, of those things.

Mostly, it had started with just plain shock, a disbelief if the encounter was really happening, that he was really standing there; it had been uncertainty at how he was going to handle the situation, how he was going to treat her, knowing the last things that were spoken between them.

All of those simple, immediate reactions had suppressed the complicated emotions she’d expected to feel.

Tugging her plain white pumps on, she gave herself one last look before walking back over to the door, her hand pausing on the doorknob, wondering if Darcy would be waiting for her on the other side.

Wondering or wishing? Shaking her head in annoyance, Beth yanked the door open to an empty hallway, more carefully walking back towards Jane’s room.

She was glad that she hadn’t felt anger, at least she’d gotten that under control.

To be angry, she would have to feel hurt, she would have to feel wronged in order to feel angry…

and she didn’t want to invite those emotions back into her life; they almost destroyed her the last time.

Beth just wanted to feel nothing for him; to be able to look at him, talk to him, walk with him down the aisle as if he had never meant anything at all to her; it was an unreasonable expectation, but then again, she’d always had those for herself.

Now that she’d gotten her first encounter with Darcy over, she couldn’t find it in herself to care about seeing Caroline Bingley.

No matter what the woman had done to her in the past, the fact was that she would have never been at Darcy’s, with Darcy, if he hadn’t wanted her.

So, Caro could be happy, she could gloat – Beth just couldn’t care about it anymore.

She met Jane, her mother, and younger sisters by Jane’s room. They all walked down and out to the limo together; Charles, his groomsmen, and Caroline were meeting them at the venue.

She climbed into the limo, scooting down to sit by Lydia, the both of them staring off absentmindedly, lost in their own thoughts.

Now that the shock of seeing him had worn off, Beth wondered what emotion she would experience next.

But more than that, she was curious to see Darcy amidst all these other people, most of them her family, and see if she still noticed that change in him or if it had just been a fluke – a momentary lapse in all rational, emotional restraint that had caused his cold mask to crack.

There was something distinctly different about him and the need to figure out what it was gnawed painfully at her; she felt the need to see him again.

She needed a new first impression of Darcy – if something like that was even possible.