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Jodi kept the new information she’d learned from Hannah to herself. Her friends were trying to move on, to put this behind them. She didn’t want to imagine the tantrum Lucy would throw if she heard what kind of crazy Emily had been cooking up. She wanted to protect Hannah’s identity as the mysterious texter, as long as the texts stopped.

When she sat down to think about it, Jodi decided that there were a lot of coincidences and freak accidents that happened to them all in the past year. If Hannah was behind the electronic stalking, then maybe that’s all it was. The drive-in was old and rickety. Lucy’s inhaler was overlooked in the panic. Paige’s electrocution could have happened to anyone, and she had been preoccupied for months over Emily; dreaming of her while unconscious was understandable. The car crash was terrible, but Kiera hadn’t been sleeping and even admitted later that someone had been harassing her online; it was probably Hannah. While Jodi did believe Nan was a legitimate medium after spending so much time with her, it didn’t mean Emily was behind any of these events.

As time went on, nothing else happened. Jodi spent the summer with Rosa and her grandmother, visiting with her dad when he was in town. She hung out with Oliver and Nikita, who were both going to the East Coast. (She had an automatic invite and a couch to sleep on if she ever decided to visit.)

One day at the end of June, Jodi texted the group chat to check in. She didn’t bother making a new one without Julian—it was easier to pretend that way. She told them she was going to visit the cemetery and pay her respects at Emily’s grave, if anyone else wanted to come.

Paige was the only one to respond. Paige picked Jodi up at Rosa’s and they rode in friendly silence over to East Lawn, broken only by a few questions about next year.

Paige’s admission to Brown hadn’t been reinstated, but UC Irvine had pushed her through. She was already talking about transferring out of the UC after the first year, but then followed up with praise for the criminal justice program at Irvine—her new passion. Jodi had a feeling Paige would be just fine there.

“What are you gonna do?” Paige asked. “Last we talked, I think it was Southern California?”

“Yeah, I got into CalArts.”

“You did?” Paige almost swerved the car. “Jodi, that’s amazing!”

“Thanks.” It hurt to think of how many times she had bitten her tongue not to mention it, but Paige had been fighting for her life. In many ways. “They have a theater design program that I got into.”

“Amazing, babe. I’ll totally drive up to see one of your plays!”

Jodi smiled. She wouldn’t hold her to it.

They parked and followed the map to Emily’s grave. Paige had bought flowers at the grocery store, but Jodi had settled for a tiny sketch on a slip of drawing paper—a girl with wide teeth and pale eyes, hair framing her face in sheets of gold.

There was a lot about Emily Mills that Jodi wished she knew when she was alive. She was manipulative and obsessive, but she was also taken advantage of in multiple ways. Jodi couldn’t lie and say that she missed her, but she did wish things had been different. She wished she’d been more direct with her. Maybe if it had been Jodi to tell her the limo wasn’t coming, Emily would have listened.

They found a simple grave with fresh flowers. Jodi was sure Maureen Mills came by often. She turned to look out over the rest of the tombstones, thinking about her mother’s grave, here somewhere. She’d never been. Maybe she could bring herself to go before she headed to college. Maybe Rosa would like to come with her and leave flowers.

“I’m sorry, Emily.” Paige’s voice was harsh, like the words had burst from her chest before her mouth had gotten the message. “I was mean to you and I lied to you. I would take it all back in an instant, and I know that means nothing…”

She choked off, turning her eyes down to her shoes. Jodi reached out and slipped her fingers through Paige’s.

“I’m not getting the flare in my pictures anymore,” Paige said to her quietly. “Isn’t that weird? Do you think maybe she’s satisfied?”

“Maybe.” Jodi squeezed her hand. “I think maybe there’s some peace now.”

“Lucy isn’t having that sleep paralysis thing anymore, either. I think it’s connected. Or at least, I’d like to think it is.”

They stood for a while. Jodi didn’t know how long you were supposed to visit a grave for. Was there something to do? Or say? Would Paige want to pray?

“I threw the bottle.” The words were whispered from Jodi’s left. Her head snapped to Paige, and if it weren’t for the tears dripping off her eyelashes, she would have thought someone else had said it. “I threw it, and I’m sorry.”

Jodi’s heart hammered. “What?”

“It was me.” Paige looked at her with wet eyes and a pink nose. “It wasn’t funny, but I thought—” She choked, and Jodi couldn’t breathe. “Do you ever feel like you’re not enough?” Paige asked.

There was a warm breeze winding its way between them. Paige’s hair ebbed and flowed.

“I’m so afraid that you guys will find out that I’m nothing. Nobody,” Paige said. Jodi’s eyes were stinging. “I feel like I’m always running to catch up with you guys. I do stupid things to make myself matter .” She turned to Emily’s headstone, raising her voice to say, “And it was wrong. It could have really hurt you. And I’m sorry.”

Jodi felt such a mix of horror and sadness, understanding and otherness. “Does Lucy know?”

Paige sniffed. “No. I was driving her car. I’d dropped her off for something.”

The breeze played with their hair, their clothes. Jodi stared at her, trying to understand.

A car door slammed in the parking lot, echoing against the gravestones. Jodi spun. Zack and Lucy were walking toward them. Lucy had a bundle of daisies in her hand.

“Don’t tell Zack,” Paige said, and then smiled brightly to wave them over.

Jodi was still trying to school her expression when Zack and Lucy reached them. It was the first time the four of them had been together since Zack’s charges were dropped, but it felt weird to be together without Julian. And now that Jodi knew another secret, it felt unbearable.

Lucy enveloped her in a hug the second she was in range, and Jodi felt herself sink into it. Lucy whispered in her ear, “Great idea. Thank you for inviting us.” Jodi’s eyes flickered to Paige while Lucy held her.

Jodi wondered if they blamed her, if they were secretly angry about Julian and wanted answers. She hadn’t really discussed why she’d reached out to Detective Harding, but they’d never asked. But she guessed it didn’t matter. What’s done was done.

Julian was the only one who wasn’t walking away unscathed.

Her eyes landed on Zack. His gaze was open and kind, but there was an edge of worry under it. “Hey, Jo.”

She nodded at him. She wasn’t sure she needed a hug from him. If he wasn’t going to wrap her up like Lucy had, then she wasn’t going to step forward.

Lucy set down the daisies and said something short and sweet. Zack did the same. After a moment, they started talking about the new roommates they’d already connected to. And it was normal. Almost.

Greg had gotten Boston to reinstate Zack’s admission. It wasn’t Zack’s first-choice school, but it was where his sister was, and he’d be on the basketball team. Lucy was in at UCLA, and she and Paige were already talking about meeting up after their first week of classes.

While the two of them talked about Rodeo Drive, Zack leaned into her. “Can we walk?”

Jodi took a deep breath and followed him between the gravestones. Someone had come by and given flowers to every single grave in the row.

“Can I ask you if you’re mad at me?” he said.

She thought about it for a moment. “No. Not really. I told you, I never wanted you to go to jail. But I do have a favor to ask you.” She turned over her shoulder to look at Paige and Lucy, thinking of how many secrets they all kept. “Tell the girls. They deserve to know the truth.”

He rolled words around in his mouth for a moment, trying to get out of it, she assumed.

“It will be hard,” she continued, “but lying to your best friends is the worst thing you can do, Zack.”

He nodded. “I will. Before we all leave.” Turning back toward her, he took a deep breath. “I feel like things between all of us are weird now. You guys will be in SoCal, but I’ll be in Boston. And Julian… Have you talked to him?”

“I’m going to visit him in August,” she said. He clenched his jaw, and she rolled her eyes. “Relax. You should talk to him. He’s your best friend.”

He cleared his throat. “Do you think maybe I could come visit you at CalArts? Maybe in October? Or I could fly you to Boston?”

His face was open, waiting. “Maybe,” she said. “I think we should try things without each other for a while. That’s what college is all about.”

“I don’t want to lose you as a friend, Jo.” His eyes were a deep blue, begging her.

She nodded and said, “I don’t think of it as a loss. I think of it as… a chance to find each other again. You’re going to the East Coast, I’m staying here. It’s impossible to stay what we were, so let’s just see what else we can be.”

She looked up at him and saw him frowning. She had the distinct impression that Zack Thrasher hadn’t gotten what he wanted for once in his life. She smiled.

ONE MONTH LATER

Jodi checked in at the desk, handed over her sharp objects, and went through the metal detector. The fluorescents buzzed above her head, and the walls seemed to echo on their own.

The guard led her to a room with the plexiglass windows and two-way phones. A few visitors were already sitting, chatting with their loved ones in orange.

She only waited thirty seconds before the heavy metal door opened behind the glass, and Julian Hollister appeared. His hair was shorn short, and his skin had lost a bit of that Gap ad glimmer, but he was smirking at her.

He dropped into the chair across from her, picked up the phone with a twirl, and said, “Julian Hollister, who’s calling?”

“It’s not fair that you can shave your hair—your career-defining hair—and still look this good.”

“It was never just the hair.” He took her in, his eyes scanning her face, memorizing. “Do you want me to say something about how you look now?”

“No, that would be a little tawdry, since you’re incarcerated.” She folded her free arm on the counter and leaned forward. “Would you like to hear that I’m sorry?”

“Not if you’re not.”

She stared back at him with a soft smile, and he did the same.

“I got my driver’s license,” she offered.

His smile was electric. “Watch out, world. Jodi Dillon is on the streets.”

She rolled her eyes. “I mean, I don’t have a car yet. But now I have more options. And I’m going to school next week,” she said. “CalArts. I’m gonna try to ‘make a career’ out of this whole theater backdrop thing.”

His eyes sparkled. “Good. I might miss the show this semester, but do you think you could save a ticket for me for spring?”

She chuckled, and the guard behind him at the door glared at the two of them. She supposed this was far lighter than most discussions in this room.

They talked for a bit, and she finally asked what she’d been wondering.

“Who was driving the car? When Emily was on the hood?”

He tilted his head at her. “I told you it was me.”

“And I don’t believe you.”

Julian’s lips twitched. “Oh yeah? Who do you think it was?”

Jodi looked him over. “The only person you’d take the fall for. Who we’d all take the fall for.”

He pressed his lips together, a smile bitten back. “Not you though. You wouldn’t have.”

“No. I wouldn’t have. Not if they’d asked me to testify.”

He sighed.

“I wrote to Hannah,” he said, and she blinked. “I don’t know if she read it, but it doesn’t really matter. That’s up to her.”

“What did you say?”

“‘Sorry.’ I meant it, too.”

Jodi nodded. “Do you remember the weird texts we were getting? It was Hannah.” Julian’s brows lifted. “She was really angry and trying to… I dunno. Maybe make sure Emily wasn’t forgotten?”

He shifted in his chair. “Yeah.”

“A lot of the other weird stuff stopped. Lucy says she doesn’t wake up like she’s being watched anymore. Paige doesn’t either. I used to dream of her—I don’t know if I told you that—but that’s stopped, too.” She took a deep breath. “I guess it might have all been in our heads. Guilt playing with us.”

The guard stepped forward and gestured to Jodi. “Time’s up.”

She nodded, and Julian took her in one last time.

“You’ll be done soon,” she said. “Me, Paige, Zack, and Lucy—we were haunted by this for a year. I know it doesn’t feel the same, and maybe this is dumb—”

“No, I get it,” he said. “This is my turn. I know I made a choice to be cruel. And I have to live with that.”

“I guess I’m saying, I’m glad you weren’t haunted over the past year. That she wasn’t… playing tricks on your picture gallery, or in your dreams, or sitting on the side of your bed in the morning.” She chuckled.

Julian looked at her, his eyes turning serious and intent. “I never said she wasn’t.”

Jodi stared, shock running over her.

“Hollister, let’s go.” The guard stepped forward.

“You—” Jodi tried to form the words. “The whole time? Or, when you—when you died—?”

“See you, Dillon,” he said. “Don’t forget to write.”

Jodi felt the moment slipping from her. He didn’t wait for her reply. The phone clanged on the receiver with finality, and he pushed back from the chair with a quick smile.

He moved to the back wall and followed the guard to the door. The sconce above him winked.

The door opened, and the second sconce surged. Julian gave her a final glance before the door closed, and Jodi watched the sconce above him flicker and go out.