Page 13

Reagan Matthews and Jake Flynn were crowned homecoming queen and king. Emily Mills earned junior princess, posthumously.

But they didn’t need to tiptoe around Paige with it. Paige wasn’t concerned with homecoming anymore. Paige was calling her aunt to ask about the medium she saw. Paige was buying crystals on the internet that kept vengeful spirits away. Paige was refusing to get together just the five of them, as she believed that was what Emily was mad about.

Jodi volunteered to go over to her house and talk to her, try to show her the news articles she’d found of other drive-in screens falling down, but Zack insisted he go.

Jodi lay on her stomach on her bed, FaceTiming with Zack, Paige, Julian, and Lucy.

“Jodi,” Paige said suddenly, and Jodi watched her jump up and run out of frame. “I totally forgot. I saw this and grabbed it for you!”

Zack checked his reflection in the FaceTime screen as they waited for Paige to bounce back onto her bed. Paige held up a hot pink flyer.

“It’s for an art contest! Zack and I saw it at Burr’s!”

“Oh, yeah,” Jodi stuttered through a response with the knowledge Zack and Paige had gone to lunch without inviting the rest of them. “I saw that at Burr’s, too.”

“Are you gonna enter?” Zack asked.

Jodi shook her head noncommittally. “Maybe! It’s for twelve-year-olds, too. I don’t think I could handle being bested by a seventh grader.”

“Or,” Lucy said, “you beat out all the seventh graders, make them cry, and we make Mr. Burr hang your picture next to our favorite booth with a plaque that says ‘For Contest Winners Only.’”

Jodi laughed as they kept building on the joke, talking about Reagan Matthews’s shithead little brother and how to get him to enter the contest just so Jodi could beat him.

At the end of the call, Paige was laughing and taking Zack’s phone and screenshotting the call screen showing all of their faces. Jodi watched her face fall for only a second before laughing at something Julian said. Later, Jodi texted her, the flare?

The three dots appeared and disappeared over and over for five minutes. Then finally:

i think it was just your mirror

Jodi’s skin broke out in chills. She whipped around, looking over the room, ignoring the rest of Paige’s texts that reassured her that it was just the grainy FaceTime call. She fell into a fitful sleep full of memories.

Jodi sat under a tree, reading the assigned chapters of A Separate Peace , looking up whenever Lucy screamed. They were in an abandoned parking lot at dusk under the pretense of teaching Jodi how to drive, but Jodi hadn’t slid behind the wheel in over an hour.

Because Emily wanted to learn how to drive, too.

Then, Zack and Paige wanted to play Ride or Die, the game they’d all come up with over the summer.

Lucy hollered, and Jodi looked up to see her long, dark limbs splayed over the hood of Paige’s moving car, going about fifteen miles per hour over the potholes in the lot. The point of the game was to ride on the hood of a car, completely at the mercy of the driver.

Jodi thought it was the stupidest way to have fun since she tried getting high for the first time, and… she didn’t think she had the balance to stay on the hood without flying off. They usually played this game in a grassy field, which had the added advantage of being able to land on grass instead of pavement, but the ride was bumpier, too.

Paige pulled the car to a stop, Lucy jumped off the hood, and Paige exited the car with Zack, Emily, and Julian.

The other reason Jodi didn’t want to play?

Paige stood in a circle of the four others, squeezed her eyes shut, extended her arm with her finger in a point, and spun in a dizzy spiral. When she stopped, her hand was pointed at Julian. Paige groaned.

The other reason was that Jodi didn’t like the one-in-four chance she had that Julian would be behind the wheel. She couldn’t trust that he would actually stop when the person on the hood screamed out “ride or die!”—their safe word, of sorts. He hadn’t stopped when Zack used it last month, and Jodi had yelled at him from the passenger seat of Zack’s Mustang.

Paige jumped up on the hood of her car, and Julian slipped behind the wheel.

Jodi half wished she’d just been dropped off at home, but even if she wasn’t participating—even if she was watching Emily Mills take her place in the circle—she didn’t want to be left out. If Paige broke her arm today or if Emily crashed Paige’s car into a tree, Jodi would have to hear about it secondhand for the rest of the school year.

She watched as Paige held on for dear life while Julian accelerated. He angled the car toward a section of grass, and just as Paige started to form the words, “Ride—!,” Julian hit the brakes and Paige flew.

Jodi gasped, jumping to her feet. Paige shot into the grass, rolling several times. Jodi was running toward her before she heard Paige giggling. Lucy was out of the car and at her side, and then both girls were laughing.

“Julian!” Jodi yelled, jogging the rest of the way to the car. “What the fuck?”

Julian stepped out of the driver’s seat, and when Jodi reached him she shoved him against the door.

“Hey! She’s fine!” He said, gesturing to Paige, who was still cracking up. “I knew what I was doing, Mom.”

“Okay, okay,” Zack said, stepping between the two of them before Jodi could bite back. “Paige is okay. We all know what we’re signing up for when we get on the hood.”

Jodi spun on her heel and stomped over to Paige. She didn’t have a scratch on her. Paige and Lucy assured her that everything was alright.

When Jodi turned back toward the car, Zack was helping Emily get onto the hood.

“No. Nope.” Jodi shook her head. “Not a chance.” She marched over to the car and reached for Emily’s arm. Emily smiled and slid her hand into Jodi’s instead, allowing herself to be tugged down.

“Just because you like to play it safe doesn’t mean Emily does,” Julian said, tilting his head at her.

“No. We’re not doing this.” Jodi looked to Paige and Lucy for help.

Paige looked conflicted. “Emily, maybe not today, okay?”

Lucy rolled her eyes. Zack looked lost.

“Emily’s the only one who hasn’t gone yet, though,” Zack said.

Jodi hesitated. She knew— she knew —that if Emily got on that hood, she’d get hurt. She felt it in her gut. Either one of them would do something stupid or Emily would try to be braver than she should.

Emily held on to Jodi’s hand even as Jodi relaxed her grip. Jodi turned to her.

“Didn’t you want to see that Marvel movie tonight?”

Sky blue eyes brightened.

No one went with them. Emily called an Uber, and they watched some movie about superheroes Jodi knew nothing about. Emily sat on her left and linked their arms, tugging Jodi’s elbow tightly into her side.

Halloween that year lacked excitement. Paige was convinced that it would be tempting fate to do anything together for the holiday, so she bowed out of watching scary movies with the four of them on the Friday before. Jodi couldn’t help but notice that the movie Lucy picked to watch at Zack’s didn’t feature ghosts or hauntings.

Zack was on his phone the entire night, texting. Lucy growled at him several times to knock it off, and that’s when Jodi figured out that it was probably Kiera he was talking to. Jodi’s mood soured after that. Her mind was reeling about Zack actually having the audacity to flirt with a new girl while being charged with statutory rape, but she couldn’t tell if she was justified in that. Maybe she was just jealous.

The next day, Oliver scored cheap tickets to a professional play. Jodi, Nikita, and Oliver drove downtown to take in live theater. When they invited Jodi to a party afterward, she passed, exhausted already. They dropped her off before heading out.

She slipped the key into the lock, and before it even clicked, she heard a football game playing. Taking a steadying breath, she inched the door open and found her dad staring blearily at the television. There were five bottles at his feet and a sixth in his hand.

After dropping her bag near the entry, she shut the door with enough noise to announce her presence.

He turned over the arm of his chair. “Why were you out so late?”

Jodi lifted her brows. “What? It’s like, midnight.”

Her dad’s face hardened. “Excuse me? It’s a school night, Jodi.”

“It’s Saturday, Dad.”

She swept to the kitchen to start the dishes. They were all hers, because he was never home to eat on them, but she was still boiling that he’d been home for probably four hours with nothing to show for it except empty bottles and the McDonald’s bag on the counter.

“The check for your lawyer was cashed today,” he said, barely audible under the television.

Jodi scrubbed the pan she’d made pasta in last night, waiting for it.

“Three thousand dollars. Three thousand just to sit next to you and say ‘No comment.’”

“It’s her retainer, Dad. It covers the first ten hours of work. And I told you we could use the court-appointed attorney—”

“We’re not using a shitty lawyer. Not for this.”

“Well, then I don’t know what to tell you!” She tossed the sponge back in the sink, giving up. “ You are the one who’s spending three thousand dollars for someone to say ‘No comment.’”

Bottles knocked together, and she turned to see him coming to his feet.

“You had one job, Jodi—stay out of trouble. Just one job to do and you fucked that up perfectly.”

“One job? Seriously? Don’t talk to me about ‘one job.’” She was done. Jodi moved toward her room, leaving the dishes for tomorrow. “And don’t pretend like that wasn’t all my college money that you decided to put toward this lawyer—”

“ Your college money? Your money? ” He stepped forward, swaying. “You didn’t earn a dime of that—Hey! Don’t walk away from me!”

She bent to grab her bag just as a current of air buzzed past her ear—then a crack and crash against the hallway wall. Jodi curled into herself, shoulders to her jaw, elbows tucked in tight. A beer bottle lay in shards at her feet, golden liquid pouring onto the rug.

He’d thrown it at her head.

Jodi didn’t turn around—didn’t want to hope for an apologetic face that wouldn’t be there. She ran for her bedroom door, slammed it shut, and locked it. She grabbed her desk chair and shoved it under the door handle, too, an extra precaution she’d begun taking last year.

Panting, she stared at the door, listening to his heavy footfalls coming closer. The doorknob rattled, and she jumped.

“You can’t talk to me that way in my own house!”

“You can’t throw things at me!” She backed away to the other side of her bed. “You promised you wouldn’t do that again.”

She hoped it would jog his memory. She hoped he would go quiet and remember the bruise on her shoulder, the sound of her crying behind her bedroom door.

But it didn’t.

“You’re being an entitled little brat. Spending way too much time with the rich kids, now you think you’re one, too.”

Jodi pulled her phone out of her pocket. When he got like this, he didn’t give up. He wouldn’t just go back to the game. He’d come back to her door every hour and pound and pound until maybe he broke it down. She hit the first number in her Favorites list and listened to the tone ring while her father ranted in broken sentences.

Zack knew. Zack knew that if she called him in the middle of the night, he needed to get there fast. He knew how to park two houses away, run up to her bedroom window, and unlatch the screen. He knew how to help her down from the outside when her short legs couldn’t reach the dirt behind the bushes. He knew how to make her smile and forget as soon as they were buckled and driving down the street. He knew not to ask.

“ Yo, this is Zack. Leave me a message. ”

She ended the call and tried again, her eyes locked on her bedroom door. There was a thump and a grunt. He’d tried to shove it open with his shoulder.

“‘Lo?” came a muffled voice through the phone.

Her heart squeezed in relief. She whispered, “I’m sorry, I need you to come.”

She could count five heartbeats in the pause.

“Dillon?”

Jodi blinked at her wall. “Julian? Where’s Zack?”

“He’s fucking passed out, Dillon.” She could hear him sitting up, his voice groggy. “It’s like, three in the morning.”

“It’s not even one A.M. Can you wake him up?”

“Who are you talking to?” Her dad’s voice came from the other side of the door. She hoped it didn’t carry through the phone.

“Wake him up? Are you serious?”

“Just wake him up! He needs to—He’s supposed to pick me up.”

The doorknob rattled. “Jo, I’m gonna break down this door if you don’t answer me.”

“He forgot to pick you up?” Julian’s confused voice asked.

“No, I just… Just wake him up and tell him I called.” She ended the call.

Zack knew. Zack knew not to ask.

“JO!”

“I’m not talking to anyone! Go watch your game. I’m going to bed.” She turned off her desk lamp and stood in the quiet darkness.

“We’re not done, Jo!”

“Good night!” She listened as the doorknob rattled again. A shoulder shoved against the door, hard.

Jodi could wait. She could lay in bed and stare at the door, hoping it wouldn’t budge. She could pray that he had more beer to blind him into a stupor. Or pray he had none, and that he’d sober up within a few hours.

Jodi could call Mrs. Burns. But she’d call the police.

Jodi could call the police. But they’d cite her dad. Or take her away until her eighteenth birthday. Only three more months of this.

Jodi could get out. She could punch the window screen out, tumble into their bushes, and go. Her bag was still in the living room with her wallet. She could walk. She could call an Uber. She could show up on Lucy’s doorstep, the closest of their houses. It was a Saturday night. Surge pricing. Could she make it there on the ten dollars in her bank account? If her card was declined by the Uber app, she could find a number for a cab company and take it to Zack’s house. Ask him for cash.

It was quiet outside her door, aside from the echoes of the television in the living room.

Jodi could wait. She waited ten minutes, standing in the dark behind her bed, like it was a dragon that could protect her if the door crashed open.

Maybe Zack would come. It took five minutes max to get from his house to Jodi’s. Maybe she just had to wait for a tap at her window and a sympathetic pair of blue eyes.

Her father’s fist pounded on her bedroom door, shaking the hinges. Jodi held her phone against her chest and stood frozen.

“I don’t know when you decided you were too good for me, but it stops today ! You hear me? You open this door, or I’ll smash through it and drag you out here—”

Jodi turned to her bedroom window. Slowly, she unscrewed the security latch. Her father was hissing threats beyond the wall, prowling like a caged bear. She tucked her phone snugly into her jeans and quietly slid the window open. She pulled her desk over a few inches and crawled on top of it.

There was a thudding, metal against stone or wood. Over and over. Something slamming down on her doorknob, trying to dislodge it.

The screen on the window wouldn’t give with a push. She tried to remember how Zack did it. Applying pressure to the top two corners she shoved with all her strength. The screen popped, falling down into the bushes with a messy crash. Jodi stood on her desk, slipped one leg through the window, and let her torso follow. Her palms were sweating as she gripped the top of the sill, leaning herself far enough out. Bracing herself on the ledge, she pulled her leg through and closed her eyes as she tumbled.

Leaves, spiky branches, cobwebs. Her legs were tangled, but she twisted onto her feet. She squeezed through the bush and heard her doorknob break.

She didn’t pause to close the window. Her legs started running, her head turned over her shoulder, waiting for her father’s red face to appear through the open window—

She slammed into something. Arms came up to her elbows and Jodi jerked back.

“Whoa.” Julian steadied her. “Did you just—fall out of your window?”

Jodi stared at him, slack-jawed. Her pulse was still racing, urging her elsewhere. “What are you doing here?”

“You needed to be picked up?” He lifted a brow at her, like she was the crazy one.

“Where’s Zack ?”

Julian shook his head. “Dillon, he’s drunk as fuck. Completely gone to the world.”

The sound of the front door opening swung her around, and she couldn’t help but stumble back into Julian as her father stomped out and stopped dead in his tracks.

“Who are you? Get the hell away from my daughter.” His voice was rough, his eyes unfocused. He was in sweatpants and a stained undershirt. Any hopes Jodi had of Julian Hollister never finding out her family secret evaporated.

She opened her mouth, ready to ease the situation until her dad would let her get in the truck parked in front of the house. Her voice croaked.

“Mr. Dillon!” Julian suddenly stepped out from behind her, walking closer to her dad. “Good to see you again.” He pointed to himself. “Julian. Jodi and I go to school together. I’m friends with Zack.”

Jodi watched in astonishment as Julian slipped easily into a character she didn’t recognize. All smiles and careful approach. Almost Zack-like.

Her dad narrowed his eyes at him, gaze flicking once to Jodi before asking, “Are you fucking my daughter?”

He barked a laugh and muttered, “She wishes. No, I was just coming by to—Hey, is that today’s game? Oregon State v. Cal?” Julian cocked his thumb toward the inside.

Jodi watched her dad nod, shaking his thoughts loose. “Yeah. Third quarter, 0 to 34.”

“Has Oregon’s coach pulled his head out of his ass long enough to get that left tackle off the field?” Julian laughed, slipping his hands into his pockets. Her dad smiled.

“You wanna come in and finish it?”

“Rain check? I was actually gonna pick Jodi up for a beer run. Can I bring you back something?”

Jodi’s legs were numb as her dad’s eyes passed over her, standing stock-still on the lawn, twigs and spiderwebs all over.

“Corona. I’m all out.”

She waited for him to realize why he was all out. She didn’t know if she wanted him to remember that he threw a full beer bottle at her head or not.

“You got it. We’ll be back in ten minutes.”

Julian swung his keys around his finger. The beep beep unlocking the truck was too loud on the silent street. Like testing fate.

Jodi stumbled to the passenger door. She climbed inside and stared down at her lap as Julian pulled away from the curb. The knees of her jeans were torn now. It wasn’t until they’d turned the corner that she finally let herself breathe.

They passed the closest liquor store that didn’t check IDs too closely, and Jodi was relieved that Julian didn’t intend to keep his promise. She stared out the window as they ignored each other, her eyes pricking with embarrassment.

She’d only told two people how bad her dad got, and one of them was dead. Emily had pressed her, asking more and more prying questions about Jodi’s mom, why she spent so many nights with the Thrashers, why she looked so tired on Mondays.

The first and only other time he’d thrown a bottle at her had been last year. She didn’t know if he remembered it the next morning, but they’d tiptoed around each other for months.

Emily wouldn’t stop asking about the bruise. Not one other person saw it, but Emily did.

“It’s tequila, for my dad.”

Jodi was pulled out of her thoughts by Julian’s voice. She fought the urge to look at him.

“Thinks he’s a connoisseur of tequila or something.”

She pressed her eyes closed. The last thing she wanted was Julian Hollister’s sympathy. It was bad enough that he knew about it at all. Couldn’t they have just never spoken of it again?

“He’s only hit me a few times though,” he said softly, and Jodi felt her skin go still. “When I’ve stolen some out of his liquor cabinet. When I flunked precalc. I was actually pretty pleased to be hospitalized after the drive-in. If I’d totaled my truck without dislocating my shoulder and breaking two ribs…” He chuckled.

Jodi’s gaze slid over to him. His knuckles were white around the steering wheel.

“He doesn’t hurt me,” she whispered in the silence, and though it wasn’t the full truth, it was close enough.

“He just scares you,” Julian said.

Jodi pressed her lips together and turned to face the window again. They were headed back to Zack’s house. He parked the truck and Jodi slid out.

They moved around the side of the house in silence, toward the pool house. When she found Zack passed out on the couch, a jolt of disappointment and anger passed through her. She’d called, and he hadn’t come.

She didn’t even notice the liquor bottle or beer cans on the table until Julian started gathering them.

“Leave them. It’s fine,” she said. “I’ll take the bed in back, if that’s okay.”

He nodded and settled on the couch as she headed down the hall. She curled her hands into fists and stared at the window that looked out over the pool until the sky turned orange.

In the morning, Zack smiled at her sleepily and asked her when she came over. Jodi sat in the corner of the couch, watching them play video games until finally Zack offered to drive her home.

She said nothing to him about it.

When she got home, the dishes were washed, the bottles recycled, and her dad smiled at her through his headache and asked if she wanted pancakes.