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12:07 a.m.

Death-Cast hasn’t called to tell me if I’m going to die today, but I want to live.

My world went dark as I was being buried alive by so many memories that I wanted to die until Paz saved me. His courage, his

defiance, his kiss, his declaration, these are all the memories that make me want to stay alive.

There are also the memories that make me feel so guilty to live.

If I had died, my time capsule would have unlocked and the secret I’ve been taking to the grave would have been unearthed

for all.

The thing is, I can remember my entire life. This includes before I was technically born. This might not seem significant

to anyone that I can remember being in the womb except for the fact that while it’s true that my father has never told me

the secret to Death-Cast, he did tell my mother while she was pregnant. I’ve known the secret since before I was born, before

I could absorb the words, before I could make sense of what was said. My parents stopped talking about the secret around me

when I was four because they were scared of me learning it, which only made me keep my own secret from them.

On the first End Day, I went into the Vast Vault at Death-Cast to see the secret for myself.

I shouldn’t have gone in. If I hadn’t, the Death’s Dozen might be alive today. I don’t know.

All I know is that love will not survive once Paz discovers I ruined his life.