Page 58 of The Runaway
“Kind of. No, I mean, it’s not your fault. But yeah, life does that. Jackelyn… she was a tough bitch, but she was also an idealist. She was convinced that life couldn’t push her around if she pushed back hard enough. And I thought maybe I could follow in her footsteps. She never wanted to have a baby, she never wanted to be mated while she was pregnant, she never wanted to beg for food or shelter, or believe that an alpha was worth more than her just because he was an alpha. But I’ve ended up doing pretty much everything she taught me not to do. So at some point, I have to wonder if she was wrong, or if I just failed really badly.”
Gabriel was temped to tell Connor he hadn’t failed, but it was an easy platitude that also meant that Jackelyn’s idealised notions of what an omega could be were wrong. And Gabriel didn’t believe that for a moment. Jackelyn sounded like an extremely insightful woman, for all that life had hardened her into something of an immovable boulder, and he was glad Connor had had someone in his life to help him see beyond his own role as an omega.
But as he sat there pondering the virtues of a woman he’d never met, Connor’s words circled back through his mind. He’d done almost everything that Jackelyn had taught him not to do. Did that mean…? “Wait, um…” Maybe he was reading this wrong. Maybe Connor just meant it in a more general way, rather than… “Do you mean you… Connor, have…” God, could he actually say it? What if he was wrong? What if he was right? “Do you mean to say you’ve had a baby?”
He waited for Connor’s awkward laugh, for him to say no, that’s not what he’d meant. But he remained silent.
“Fuck me, are you serious?” Gabriel muttered, more to himself than to Connor, but Connor replied anyway.
“Just one. On the first estate that bought me after the baby farm.”
“They bought you as a breeding omega? I don’t mean any offence by this, but I wouldn’t have thought you were expensive enough for that.”
Connor shook his head. “No, they didn’t buy me for that specifically. But it was a poor farm. There were only three betas and two omegas, including me, and the other one was old, maybe fifty. And the master decided he needed a baby if he was going to keep the estate going after he died…”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Seven Years Ago – Blanchet Estate
Connor roused himself, feeling like he was fighting his way up through treacle as he tried to surface from a cloying sleep. Eventually he managed to pry his eyes open, finding himself lying on a filthy pallet, Thomas Blanchet sprawled out naked beside him.
He felt bile rise in his throat and swallowed it down again. It was only his second true heat and already he was sick to death of the arduous hours of sex and brain-fog. The memory of his master’s hands all over his skin made him shudder. And he’d have to do this every year for the next thirty or so years? God help him.
He rolled over, not worrying too much about waking Thomas. If last year was anything to go by, his master would want to be out of this dingy little room as soon as possible, and the sooner he left, the sooner Connor could go and bathe.
Thomas snorted, then rolled over. He came awake suddenly, belched, then sat up, palming his cock as he did so. “Fuck me, you’re a good lay,” he muttered, rubbing his eyes with his other hand. “Nice and tight. Not like that other saggy old cunt.” Audrey was the other omega owned by Thomas, and she’d been on the estate for over twenty years. She wasn’t rude or unpleasant in any way, but Connor didn’t like her, finding her to be more like an animated corpse than a person. She had no enthusiasm for any task whatsoever, no interest in conversation, and seemed to simply accept that life was a slow trudge from the cradle to the grave, with nothing in between worth making a fuss over.
“I’ll clean up the room,” Connor announced, hoping that by trying to appear helpful, he could hasten Thomas’s exit. “And I’ll also need to make some of that herbal tea. Do you have a packet ready?”
This was the norm in places that weren’t trying to farm babies, he’d learned. Most omegas were given a concoction of various herbs after their heat to prevent a pregnancy taking hold, and Connor had been relieved beyond measure when the master had sat him down and made him drink a cup of the bitter tea after his heat had finished last year. As unpleasant as it was to bleed for three or four days, it was far preferable to having a baby grow inside him.
But rather than standing up and getting dressed, Thomas lounged back against the filthy blankets. “Not this time,” he said, staring up at Connor with a smirk.
Connor hesitated in confusion. “Not what, this time, sir?” he asked.
“This time I’m going to get myself a whelp on you.” He reached out, placing a meaty hand on Connor’s belly. “You’re young enough and pretty enough. I’d like to see that belly all plump and swollen. I need me an heir, you see, and Audrey’s too old to carry one. So it looks like it’s up to you.”
Connor froze on the spot, his mind not quite comprehending what he was being told. Pregnant? He was going to have a baby? The idea was horrifying, like someone had just told him he was going to have one of his arms cut off. Most of what he knew about pregnancy he’d learned from Jackelyn, and all of it sounded terrible. His belly would swell, along with his ankles, most likely. He’d feel sick for weeks on end, he’d cry a lot, and then at the end of it all, he’d have to force an object the size of a pumpkin out of a hole the size of a cucumber.
He desperately tried to think of something to say that would change Thomas’s mind, that could deter him from this outrageous plan. But fear and disgust chased the words away, leaving him gaping dumbly at his master.
Thomas’s eyes roamed down over Connor’s body, and despite the last twelve hours of rampant sex, Thomas’s cock swelled. “Oh, yes, I’m going to enjoy you being pregnant,” he drawled, pulling himself up onto his knees. “Starting right now. Kneel down, turn around, and spread your legs.”
“No, please, I…” He’d only just finished his heat, and his body was sore. Not to mention the fact that his mind was roiling at the idea of carrying a child for the next nine months.
“No?” Thomas’s eyebrows rose. “You mean to defy me, Connor?”
“No, sir,” Connor said quickly, swallowing down his panic. Stiffly, he got on his knees and turned around. He leaned down on his elbows, knowing that Thomas liked him in this position, spread wide and vulnerable. He winced as he felt Thomas’s cock press its way into his body again, and tried not to think about the seed that he’d left there in the last twelve hours, and about how it would be worming its way into his own body to start an ugly pink blob growing inside him. He tried not to think at all, and tried to remember how to breathe…
???
Connor’s first plan was to find some pennyroyal in the forest to abort the pregnancy. He remembered clearly from Jackelyn’s lessons what it looked and smelled like, and how much to take without making himself sick. But the first problem with his plan was that he rarely had an excuse to leave the estate, and the second problem was that there was very little forest or wildflower areas growing in the immediate area. The Blanchet estate was smack in the middle of a huge farming region, and almost any available ground was used to grow wheat, farm vegetables, or graze sheep.
And a very significant third problem was that even if Connor did manage to find some pennyroyal, he doubted he’d have the courage to drink the tea. This wasn’t like back on the baby farm, where no one really paid attention to who was pregnant and who wasn’t. If he aborted his pregnancy, Thomas would notice almost immediately. The herbs would lead to days of bleeding as his body rid itself of the beginnings of the pregnancy, and given Thomas’s habit of mating with him almost daily, it would be impossible to hide the result. And then… would he be sold for failing to fall pregnant? Or beaten? Or perhaps he’d even be killed for disobeying his master in so flagrant a manner.
Weeks passed, and the question became moot. Connor had no opportunity to go searching for the necessary herbs, and so his pregnancy proceeded without interference. He did, indeed, begin to feel sick every morning, though he was given no extra food if he happened to lose his breakfast. By the fourth month, his middle was filling out, and he felt utterly disgusted with the way his body was becoming heavier and more cumbersome. On top of that, he frequently felt lightheaded, and would then be berated by Thomas for slacking off in his duties.
Time dragged on, and by the time Connor reached his eighth month of pregnancy, he fully understood why Jackelyn had refused to go through this more than once, even risking death as punishment for the chance to avoid it. His body felt sluggish and bloated. His knees ached. His back ached. He still felt nauseous every morning, and the pressure the baby was putting on his bladder was causing him to get up several times throughout the night to piss, meaning he was constantly short on sleep.