Page 71

Kota

I was surprised by how much my mom ended up liking Crew.

I didn’t necessarily think she would dislike him, but with what she’d heard at the beginning of our living arrangement, I was prepared for the worst.

I used to call her ranting about Crew, giving her every reason as to why he was the worst person on the planet. And now we were dating.

My mom assured me that she would go into lunch with an open mind, and she surely kept her promise. Crew hadn’t admitted it, but I think he was nervous. When I first told him that my mom wanted to meet him immediately, he froze like an icicle, eyes wide, breath stalled. It took him a few minutes to ease up, and a few days later, we spent our Saturday afternoon at Stella’s, and of course, Crew ordered breakfast food even though it was one o’clock in the afternoon.

Waking up on Sunday, my stomach was already in nervous knots. The day felt like one long countdown to dinner with Crew’s parents, and the closer we got to five o’clock, the more anxious I became.

I’d already met Crew’s mom, and she was an angel, but I had yet to meet his dad. Honestly, I think most of my anxiety was stemming from knowing that Crew was anxious.

He hadn’t sat still since he woke up, fidgeting and pacing like an animal at the zoo.

Now, smoothing out my baby blue dress in the passenger seat, my eyes jumped back and forth between the road and Crew. His chest was visibly rising and falling so heavily that it was quite alarming. I could hear the strained exhale he let out, breathing uncertainty into the air.

Reaching for his hand, I said, “You okay?”

He gave my hand a squeeze, but it wasn’t very reassuring. “Yeah.”

“Nervous?”

Another deep breath, his voice falling off. “Yeah...”

The Italian restaurant we were going to was called Francesca’s, and it was supposed to be really nice, located right in the middle of town. Bridget had actually been here once on a date with Mitch way back when she was seeing him, and she said the food was amazing.

As we walked in, it felt like entering a cave. The sunshine from outside disappeared, replaced with dim lighting. Paintings of Italian landscapes adorned the walls, along with fancy lamps that looked like the same candelabras from Beauty and the Beast.

With each step, Crew’s grip on my hand tightened, and as we turned the corner, catching a glimpse of his parents seated at a table across the room, he stopped in his tracks.

“Okay,” he breathed with a light shiver. “My parents haven’t been in the same room in years. I’m gonna apologize ahead of time for their behavior.”

“Crew,” I shook my head, “it’s okay. Everything is going to be fine.”

“Yeah, I hope so,” he murmured, hardly audible over the instrumental music playing overhead.

Closing the gap to their table, it felt like I was dragging Crew along. He was resisting so much that I wasn’t sure if he was about to turn around and book it.

Crew’s dad was sitting on his phone while his mom faced the opposite way, crossing her arms. Clearly, they hadn’t spoken more than five words to each other. Even though their chairs were seated next to one another, they had separated their seats further, practically each settled at the corners of the table.

Already disapproving of their behavior, Crew gave a stern announcement to our arrival. “Hey.”

“Oh!” his mom beamed, jumping up and embracing me for a hug. “Kota! It’s so nice to see you again, sweetheart.”

“You too,” I smiled. Crew’s dad stood, shaking my hand with a warming smile.

“It’s nice to meet you,” he said.

“You too,” I repeated, taking a seat across from his mom.

“Have you guys been here long?” Crew sat.

“Nah,” his dad said. “I got here five or so minutes ago.”

“Me too,” his mom said, but there was an edge to her tone, a stark difference from the vibrant persona we’d seen just moments prior.

Going into this dinner, I’d gone through a checklist in my head of things to do and not to do, revolving around manners and making a good impression.

But sitting here now, feeling the light shake of Crew’s bobbing leg beside me and catching the petrified gleam in his eye, all I could think about was comforting him.

I laid my black napkin on my lap, then reached for Crew, resting my hand on his shaking knee. Immediately, he relaxed under my touch, placing his hand over mine. His warmth soaked into my skin, and I knew the squeeze he gave was the closest thing to a “Thank you” that he could currently give.

“I wasn’t sure what you both wanted to drink, but our waitress should be back shortly,” Crew’s dad said.

I barely had time to nod before his mom was speaking, pretending like her ex-husband wasn’t there.

“So, Kota, I remember last time I saw you that you mentioned you were starting to prep for finals. How’s that going?”

“It’s going well, actually. I still have two weeks to study, but I’m feeling prepared.”

“That’s great! What was your major again?”

“Biology,” I answered. I was trying to make eye contact with both of them, to make it feel like one, cohesive conversation. But there was an invisible line drawn between them, and I got the feeling this was going to be a much messier dinner than I thought.

“Right,” she smiled. “That seems like a really difficult and elevated major.”

“It definitely hasn’t been easy,” I chuckled, shaking my head.

“I bet,” she agreed. “Do you know what you want to do?”

“Definitely some sort of lab work, but I haven’t quite figured out the specifics. I just recently started looking though.”

Smile brightening with hope, she placed her elbows on the table, chin resting in her hands. “Where at?”

“Um, Chicago,” I admitted.

“Oh!” she squealed.

“That’s great,” his dad said. “You’ll be close to Nick.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but his mom was back at it.

“Do you guys think you’ll live together again?”

Crew and I glanced at each other. “Probably,” I said.

“You’ll be able to go to all his home games!” his dad beamed.

It seemed like every time they were looking at Crew and me, they were the happiest, most awestruck people in the world. But when they caught a glance of each other, only hostility remained.

Crew stayed quiet as his mom continued asking questions, hijacking the conversation as if we were the only two in the room. Each time I glanced at his dad, he seemed to become more and more frustrated, opening his mouth numerous times to speak before getting cut off by his ex-wife. His jaw clenched, eyes rolling as he angled his body the opposite way just to let out a huff.

Getting interrupted by our waitress didn’t help as much as I hoped it would. The air eased for just a moment as she took our orders and brought wine for Crew and me.

It felt like our table was surrounded by a bubble of bitter resentment, blocking out the tables around us. We were in our own world over here, and as awkward as I was feeling, I couldn’t imagine what was circling through Crew’s head.

Turning to his ex-wife for the first time since we arrived, Crew’s dad snapped. “Do you ever stop talking?”

“Here we fucking go,” Crew muttered under his breath.

My mouth popped open, and I shut it quick, holding my breath.

The stars in his mom’s eyes morphed into an inferno. “Hmm...” she gave a condescending laugh. “That’s interesting coming from you.”

“Oh really?” he seethed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh nothing,” she grinned maliciously.

“I don’t know why you feel the need to try to make me look bad in front of our son and his new girlfriend.”

“Me?” her voice cracked. “You were the one who started this.”

“Yes, because you never know when to shut up and let other people talk.”

She growled, “You’re acting like a child.”

Crew tossed his napkin on the table as he stood, stomping out without a word.

Unsurely rising to my feet, I nervously muttered, “Excuse me,” before racing towards the door, nearly knocking over a waiter carrying three plates.

With his hands placed on his hips, head tipped upwards, Crew stood with his back towards me. My white heels tapped against the pavement with each step, erasing the space between us. If he heard me coming, he didn’t turn. My arms barely reached around him as I hugged him from behind, smushing my face against his back and hoping that I didn’t get any makeup on his white button-up.

Inhaling the husky aroma of sandalwood, I sighed through the sudden burst of alleviation that overwhelmed me just from the smell.

“Are you alright?” I spoke.

“I knew this was a bad idea,” he sighed.

“Hey,” I quietly said, spinning him around.

Beneath his beautiful brown irises, there were years of pain shining through. Golden hour had set in, and usually, at this time of the day specifically, Crew resembled what every girl dreamed their future husband would look like— stunning and strong, like a real prince.

But he was currently a shell of that god-like man I’d encountered. The sun wasn’t illuminating every gorgeous feature of his; it was only amplifying the glossiness of his eyes, the crumbling of his spine.

Chin dipping, I could see the apology plastered on his face.

“I’m sorry,” I said, cupping his jaw in my hands.

“No, I’m sorry,” he replied. “We should just go.” Shaking his head, he stepped backwards, out of my grasp.

“No!” I caught his wrist. “Why don’t you go back in there and tell them how you really feel?”

“Ah,” he made a face, “I don’t know.”

“C’mon. I know they’re your parents, but you don’t have to keep going on like this. I can tell how much it’s been hurting you for a long time. Go in there and tell them off.” Giving a light sway, I smirked with encouragement, “You’ve done it to me plenty of times.”

The flicker of a smile that I caught made my heart speed, a nice reminder that it was still working after this mess of a dinner. If you could even call it a dinner. I mean, goddamn, we hadn’t even gotten to our appetizers yet.

“I don’t even know what to say.”

“You don’t have to plan it,” I shrugged. “Just say whatever comes to mind. That’s usually when the most powerful parts of the truth come out.”

Quickly nodding, Crew grabbed both sides of my face, syncing our lips for a searing kiss. He tasted pungent like Italian wine, and even though I preferred my wine sweet, I kissed him like he was the most delicious thing I’d ever tasted.

Still holding my cheeks between his calloused hands, his eyes bounced around my face. “I love you.”

Not only was my heart speeding, but now it was swelling, doubling in size like the Grinch. “I love you too.”

He smiled that infamous, striking smile of his, touching our lips once more before leading the way back inside.