Page 54 of The Good Vampire’s Guide to Blood & Boyfriends
THE PARTY OF THE CENTURY
brENNAN’S PHONE
r/occultboston
u/micahlandau
Thank you for believing me: a note before the vampire ball
I wanted to say, as I’m getting dressed up for this vampire ball and preparing to meet up with so many of you, that I’m so grateful to have found a community of smart, creative, open-minded people.
I don’t want to get too much into history, but a tl;dr is that I spent most of my life going to therapists who told me I was crazy for believing in what I know is real after having a vampire encounter when I was really young.
The vampire I met wasn’t evil, and he didn’t hurt me, and I have no hatred for vampires.
I just need to know if they’re real… I needed to know I wasn’t crazy.
Regardless of what happens at the ball, you guys have given me that.
Thank you, and I’m looking forward to seeing all of you tonight. I’ll be the girl in the fabulous red velvet dress.
u/weepncreep: did anyone else think OP was a guy for like, the last 3 months
u/willfullyignorant: Yep
u/hardlyahater: lmao, same
“The New Squad” Group Chat with you and 4 others
Brennan
So I’ll see you guys at our place before the ball for last-minute cramming.
But everyone knows their part?
Cole
infiltrating the ball with you!
Mari
yep. eyes and ears at the entrance, ready to get people evacuated.
Tony
reporting for sauce duty cap’n
Dom
I get the fun part. Breaking Sunny and Nellie out with Quinn and the Facebook vamps.
Brennan
Cool cool cool.
Cole
we’ve got this you guys!
Tony
it’s go time bitches
Everyone gathered to get ready at Brennan and Tony’s as if it were prom day, but the quiet nervousness as they all suited up felt more like a funeral.
Cole looked amazing in a dark green suit, but unfortunately there would be no getting distracted in a coat closet at the ball somewhere, no dancing and flirting. Those thoughts would have to be reserved for later.
Assuming there was a later.
Cole also had large, tacky glow-in-the-dark fangs.
When he’d shown Brennan a few days ago, Brennan had feigned offense.
“That’s culturally insensitive,” he teased, as seriously as he could manage, and Cole nearly believed him and started to apologize before Brennan’s laugh finally broke free.
Cole punched him in the arm but followed up with a kiss, so he didn’t feel quite chastised.
Now, though, Brennan felt like he was going to throw up. No easy teasing and laughter.
They emerged into the living room, where Dom was already ready, perched on the arm of a chair, the perfect picture of a Gothic vampire with dark hair, pale skin, and a deep navy blue velvet gown.
Brennan himself wore all black, an oversized blazer, and some old combat boots and chain accessories from his edgier high school days.
Tony strolled out of his room at the same time in standard black business casual and took in the room.
“Damn,” he said. “You’re all smoking, do you hear me? I’m in love with each and every one of you.”
“We should all head out soon,” Dom said. “We should get to our places early.”
“Ah, geez, you sound like Mari.”
Mari stormed in from the bathroom like she’d been summoned, wearing a red off-the-shoulder number, hands busy fiddling with her second dangly gold earring.
Tony gaped at Mari, and Brennan exchanged glances with Cole to confirm that he was also seeing Tony’s heart-eyes.
Dom, oblivious or simply uncaring, said, “Well, Mari’s right. Timing is everything. Are we ready or what?”
The room fell quiet. That nervous buzzing energy returned. Mari’s earring was secured.
“Looks like it,” Brennan said.
“Then let’s go,” said Dom. She moved to stand and the others followed suit, slowly, with a sense of dread.
“Hold on,” Brennan said. They turned to him. These people, his friends, gave him their full attention and waited. “I…” He stopped.
He wasn’t often at a loss for words—more often he had too many of them to speak or write down. But now, he had only this:
“Thank you, guys.”
It barely scratched the surface of his gratitude, but maybe it was enough.
The hotel in Boston was old and classic, with white marble floors, elaborate wooden paneling, grand chandeliers, and wide-open ballrooms—the grandest of which would hold the vampire ball.
Everything was lush and Gothic, black-clad employees rushing around and setting things up: an elaborate fountain of red punch that ostensibly looked like blood, vampire-themed snacks decorated with bats and fangs, a photo area with plastic fangs and other props.
They’d arrived early so Brennan could sniff out the snack table as best he could, scenting for blood or anything unusual. But everything smelled normal. So they waited.
As minutes ticked by, the ballroom began to fill with more people in dresses and costumes—Gothic steampunk, elaborate gowns, capes and coattails, an impressive group of What We Do in the Shadows cosplayers.
Even the musicians in the corner—a string quartet that began at 7 p.m. on the dot—were sharply dressed, with fake blood placed at the corners of their mouths and down their chins.
There was a small cluster of people huddled around their phones that Brennan only recognized as Redditors because Micah, the girl at the center of the huddle, wore the same velvet burgundy gown pictured in her last post. At her hip was a stake sharp enough to do real damage, vampire or not.
Brennan silently added that to his growing list of potential time bombs.
He and Cole lingered at the edges of the room, watching carefully.
Every few minutes, Brennan did another pass to check on the food and drink.
Every few seconds, Brennan checked his phone for texts from the group chat to see if anyone had seen anything yet.
Every minute Travis didn’t show up, he worried he had miscalculated. What if Travis had some other plan and Brennan had taken his bait? What if Travis ran into Dom and the others they’d recruited off Facebook when they were waiting for their opportunity to free Sunny and Nellie?
Brennan’s phone pinged. His stomach dropped. He grabbed Cole’s hand and squeezed, felt Cole squeeze back, and took in the message. It was from Mari.
“Travis is here,” Brennan said.
He didn’t need to say it. Travis’s entrance had its own effect, heads turning like a tide toward the door. Like he had a magnetic pull.
He must, Brennan realized. A vampire that powerful could influence and charm humans without even meaning to.
The powerful vampire in question wore a monstrosity of a tweed suit with roughly sewn-on patches at the elbows. His dreads were pulled back in a thick bun. He was as relaxed as ever, an easy smile on his face as he took in the room.
He spotted Brennan and Cole and lit up. As if they were old friends.
“Oh lord, is he coming over here?” Cole hissed.
“It unfortunately seems that way,” Brennan whispered, and then Travis was in front of them, arms spread wide, open and grinning.
“You guys made it! Looking good, eh? I know, I clean up nicely—”
“Can we skip the small talk?” Brennan asked. “If you’re here to gloat or make threats or maniacally laugh, let’s start with that.”
“Ah, Brennan, charming as ever.” Travis’s eyes flitted to Cole. “And your snack. Coooo-dy… or… Clint?”
Brennan curled his hands into fists.
“It’s Cole—”
“Travis, you’re a dick,” Brennan said. “Your accent’s fake and we’re not friends. Do your fucking worst.”
Travis’s jaw dropped. He almost— almost —looked hurt.
“Well then, mate,” Travis said, the Aussie flair amped up, “I’ll leave you two to enjoy the party.”
Travis retreated.
“Um,” Cole said, reaching for Brennan’s arm, “I thought we were trying to buy time, not piss him off.”
“Well, his accent sucks, someone had to tell him.”
“Brennan!”
“I’m sorry! He started talking about you and I saw red.” Travis was already talking animatedly with two people across the way. “Look, he rebounded quickly.”
And so it went, with Travis chatting the ears off any guests who would listen, then moving on to the next group.
Brennan kept a close eye on him for any suspicious moves, eavesdropped around the hall to make sure he wasn’t conspiring, kept on his schedule of sniffing out the snack table for vampire blood every few minutes.
But nothing. It was driving Brennan insane. “He’s toying with us,” Brennan said.
It was 8:30 exactly when Travis made his way over to the punch fountain. Brennan and Cole exchanged looks.
“Wait here,” Brennan said.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Cole frowned but nodded. Brennan pressed a light kiss to his crinkled brow and smoothed it over.
“You’ve got this,” Cole said. “I’m right here if you need me.”
And Mari and Tony were outside the doors. And if all went to plan, Dom, Nellie, Sunny, and a few Facebook vampires would soon be on their way. Brennan wasn’t alone. He knew that.
He crossed the ballroom and stopped in front of Travis, the fountain between them. For a second, they took each other in, and Brennan thought distantly of those old Westerns, a tumbleweed behind them, an ominous whistle.
“Oh, Brennan.” Travis sighed. “I’ll give you this: you’re the most entertainment I’ve had in decades.”
Brennan seethed. “Is this a game to you?”
“No matter how this goes, Brennan, know I’m getting exactly what I wanted.”
“And what’s that?”
Travis grinned, and Brennan’s stomach dropped.
“A swan song.”
Brennan’s blood chilled in his veins.
“The vampire blood is a neat gimmick, I’ll admit, but it’s not a deal-breaker. If I have to do everything myself, then I’ll do everything myself.”