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Chapter twenty-six

Emmett Foster

I close my eyes as a warm summer breeze sweeps across the yard. It’s been a while since I’ve taken the time to sit out here at night. I used to a lot more; after I first got the house, I was battling through single parenthood. I’d sit in the very chair I’m in now, with a baby monitor on the coffee table in front of me, and stare up at the stars.

Tonight I’m not escaping life, though, but waiting for it to walk out the back door. I thought when I laid down earlier that I’d done a good job resisting her today, but then she answered my text and all I could think about was seeing her. Suddenly morning seemed too far away, and I wanted her to myself before the day began and we both had to give our time and attention to those we care for again.

The sound of the door creaking open has me looking over the back of the chair. Hazel gives me a timid smile as she approaches. She’s wearing her sunshine pajamas, the ones she got to match June. They both wore them tonight, and I thought June would never settle down because of how ecstatic she was.

Hazel wraps her arms around herself, and I’m glad I had the forethought to bring a blanket. The night breeze brings goosebumps every time it blows by.

“There’s a blanket for you in the chair,” I tell her as she walks around to take a seat next to me.

“Thanks, I didn’t realize it would be so chilly.” She sits down and pulls the blanket up over her bare legs. I swallow at the sight. Yeah, the blanket was a good call.

Her head tilts back against the chair. She watches the stars and I watch her.

“It’s beautiful out here.”

“Mmm,” I agree.

The profile of her face against the night sky is breathtaking. She turns her head to look at me, a shy smile tugging at her lips when she catches me staring. Everything about her is inviting me in.

“Do you come out here often?” she asks, then cringes. “That sounded like a cheesy pick-up line when I so did not mean for it to.”

My mouth hitches up. “I used to. I haven’t in a little while.”

“Why not?” she asks, curiosity shining in her gaze.

This is the part I’ve been unsure about. The opening up. I know that if I want something with Hazel, there’s no way around it, but that doesn’t mean my chest doesn’t tighten at the thought of sharing personal things. It’s not like I bared my soul often with Shelby–she didn’t seem to care enough to pry–but what I did share felt like a betrayal of trust at the end of our marriage.

As I stare into Hazel’s kind eyes, though, I know deep down she wouldn’t do the same. She’d sooner hurt herself than hurt someone she cares about. And though it’s inexplicable, I think I’m one of those people.

“I haven’t felt as much of a need to.” I look back up at the stars. It’s easier to share this way. “I used to come out here to escape when things got rough after Shelby left.”

Just saying her name feels like swallowing glass. The syllables taint the air, souring the sweet magnolia breeze.

“I’m sorry, Emmett, I know today was hard.”

My brow furrows. I turn my face toward her again. She’s looking down at her lap, toying with a string on the blanket.

“No, that’s not why I came out here tonight.”

She looks at me, worry lining her expression. “It isn’t?”

I give her a soft smile and hold out my hand. She takes it and all thoughts of Shelby and the past disappear. This . This is what it’s supposed to be like. Nothing to prove. I can just be .

“I asked you out here because I wanted to change the memories associated with this spot…and because I couldn’t wait until morning to see you again.”

I run my thumb over the back of her hand. A smile spreads across her face.

“I’m glad you asked me out here. I wanted a chance to talk to you alone, but after dinner it never came.”

“Yeah, a five-year-old and a fifteen-year-old in the same house don’t make for much alone time,” I say and she laughs. The sound fills the yard. It’s as if everything brightens, even the moonlight. As if she were the sun it’s reflecting.

“No, they don’t.”

She looks down again. I wait patiently for her to find the words she wants to say.

“Earlier at my apartment, you said you liked me,” she begins.

“I did, and I meant it.”

“And at the hospital, you hugged me. You called me your brave girl.” Her blush deepens a shade. “Then after that, Wildflower.”

I continue rubbing circles on her hand, waiting for her to finish her thoughts.

“You invited me and Raven here. You fed me…you kissed me.” Her head lifts. Insecurity mixed with vulnerability shines in her eyes. “I don’t want to make any presumptions–” she cuts herself off.

“Presume as much as you’d like,” I tell her, enjoying the way her eyes light with surprise. “As long as you’re thinking that I care for you and have feelings for you.”

“I feel the same way. I have feelings for you too.” She sits up a little taller. “I know you have June to think about. I don’t want to push anything. I-I’m happy taking things slow.”

I smile at her nervous rambling. “Do you really think I’m worried about June when it comes to you? She adores you. The only concern I have is if I ruin this and you leave. She’ll never forgive me.” I attempt to keep my tone light, but I must fail because Hazel squeezes my hand.

“I don’t think you could ruin this, Emmett.”

“I almost did before it even started. I was terrible to you after New York. But the media– I hate them . I couldn’t bear the thought of June dealing with the backlash at school.”

She grimaces. “I don’t know that that’s going to go away. I’m her nanny. That’s going to make for some creative headlines.”

“It might, but the difference now is I’m sure. Before, I was worried that I was risking too much without being certain. Now, I know what I want.”

Our eyes lock. My breathing becomes shallow.

“I want you , Wildflower. I want to eat chocolate chip pancakes in the morning and bring home strawberry matcha when you’ve had a bad day. I want to listen to your elaborate bedtime stories and then sit out here under the stars. I want to see you in the stands at my games and teach you about baseball so you know what’s going on.” She lets out a soft giggle. “ I want you , Hazel. And I really hope you feel the same, otherwise I just made a huge mistake.”

Tears fill her eyes. I hope beyond hope that they’re happy ones.

“I’ve had a crush on you almost since the day I started. I told myself you’d never be interested in me.”

My heart swells to the size of the moon above us. “I’m sorry it took me so long to dispel that idea.”

She smiles as a tear falls onto her cheekbone. “I’ve heard you can’t rush this sort of thing.”

Love . She means love. It feels far too soon to say it out loud, but I think she’s on the right track.

I tug on her hand, but stay seated. She stands, as if unsure that’s what I want. With another gentle pull, I guide her to move in front of me before letting go of her hand to hold her waist. Without shifting her gaze from mine, she gathers my meaning and slowly sits in my lap. Her arms drape over my shoulders.

The moonlight frames her silhouette. I’m overwhelmed by the notion of getting to hold her in my arms. It feels like I’ve plucked a star out of the sky to keep.

“If I’m moving too fast,” I whisper and reach up to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. She shivers. “Tell me. You just make it very difficult to hold back.” My knuckle traces her jawline. She sucks in a sharp breath.

“I don’t think–” Her voice catches. “I don’t think I know what it’s like to be wanted in that way.”

I cup her face. “Then allow me to show you.”