Page 18

Chapter eighteen

Hazel James

I tuck my hands under my thighs to stop myself from fidgeting. My left leg starts to bounce. I still it. The anxious energy makes my limbs ache, but I don’t want Emmett or anyone else to notice my nerves. I settle on curling my toes in my tennis shoes, which helps a little.

All morning, Emmett has acted…off. Not out of character enough to alarm me, but he’s pulled back. His scowl is firmly in place, and he hasn’t teased me about anything or given me any warm glances. It feels as though I’ve just jumped out of the plane we’re currently in, except I’m planted in my seat across from him.

June watches a movie beside me. Emmett has his eyes shut with headphones on. Maybe he’s tired? It has been a long few days. I chew on my lower lip.

“Hey, you okay?” Emerson leans over from the row next to us. He tried to sit closer, but he must have seen the same thing in Emmett’s stormy expression that I did and decided it was best to keep some distance. The two guys next to him match Emmett with their headphones and eyes closed.

I force a smile. “I’m okay.”

He raises his brows. “No, you’re not. Did you and Emmett have a falling out?”

That free-falling feeling comes back. “I don’t think so. Not that I know of.”

“You don’t sound so sure.”

I let out a sigh. “He’s just a little broody this morning, that’s all.”

Emerson chuckles. “Checks out. It’s probably not your fault though. He might still be mad at the reporter from last night’s game.”

I frown. “What are you talking about?”

“I guess you wouldn’t have seen it yet.” He lowers his voice. “This reporter was asking Emmett if you were dating because you and June did that cute gesture thing.”

If I was falling out of the plane before, now I’m barrelling headfirst toward a cluster of jagged rocks.

“I-I just did that because she asked me to. It doesn’t mean anything.”

His smile is much too devious for comfort.

“Whatever you say, Belle .” I glare at him. He laughs. “Either way, the reporters love to latch on to stuff about your man. He never gives them so much as a crumb and you gave them a big slice of rumor pie.”

I glance at Emmett. I’ve kept my voice low, as has Emerson, but is there a chance he’s listening to us? How much do those headphones block out?

I tug my sweatshirt sleeves down over my palms. “I wasn’t trying to start any rumors. Is this going to go away?”

Emerson waves a hand. “Emmett has one of the best agents around. I’m sure they’ve already got a plan in place. And there’s always something to talk about in the sports world. A dumb college player will get arrested for reckless driving and your little gesture will be old news in no time.”

I slowly nod, having no idea if what he’s saying is true. When I worked for the Lawsons, I didn’t pay attention to sports news. The only thing I watched was the game coverage and the occasional special about charity work the team was doing.

I sigh. “I hope you’re right.”

“Don’t worry about it. Emmett will be back to his normal level of grouchiness tomorrow after a good night’s sleep. He had a rough go of it with the media after his divorce, so he’s more prone to anger when it comes to stuff like this.”

That makes sense. I’d be upset too if the media plastered my family drama all over TV screens and news articles.

“Thanks, Emerson,” I say with a small smile.

He tips his baseball cap. “Anytime.”

I sit back in my seat and draw in a deep breath.

“Miss Hazel?” June whispers, using the library voice I told her about when we first got on the plane.

“Yes, sweet pea?”

She stares up at me with trepidation in her gaze. Her pink headphones are down around her neck, Moana paused on the tablet in her lap. “I need to go potty, but I don’t like walking on the plane. One time it started moving and I got scared.”

I give her a reassuring smile. “I’ll walk with you and we can hold hands. Would that help?”

She nods. “I think so. Thank you.”

I run a hand over her curls. “You’re welcome, honey.”

She sets her tablet aside along with her headphones and gingerly slides out of her seat. I stand up and hold out my hand. Her tiny one slides into mine.

Thankfully, the plane is quite large and we’re able to walk comfortably down the aisle, but I do occasionally have to dodge the protruding leg of a teammate or a staff member pushing a galley cart. We take our time walking. I smile at the occasional awake passenger. Two of the guys wave at June, which makes her smile. By the time we reach the bathroom, she already seems more relaxed.

“I’ll be right here if you need me,” I say to her and squeeze her hand. She squeezes back before going into the small plane bathroom and closing the door.

After a few minutes, she reappears.

“I washed my hands!”

I smile at her announcement. “Good job, sweet pea. Ready to go back to our seats?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

We join hands again and walk back. When we return, Emmett’s eyes are open and watching us. I smile at him, but I’m sure it looks awkward with how off things still feel between us. I hope this goes away soon. Until today, New York was an amazing trip. I loved hanging out with Jason and Willow, rooting for Emmett at the games, and having sleepovers with June. It was all perfect, and I went to sleep last night hoping there would be more trips like this in the months to come. After all the stress of dealing with my parents, it felt like a break from the harsh reality of my life.

June climbs into her seat as I fall back in mine. Emmett slides his headphones down.

“She needed to go to the bathroom,” I explain. He nods.

“Miss Hazel helped me because I don’t like walking on the plane,” June adds.

“You were very brave.”

She beams at me before launching herself over the armrest and into my arms.

“I love you, Miss Hazel!”

I hug her tight, breathing in the scent of the curl cream I put in her hair this morning. My eyes squeeze shut in an attempt to keep my composure.

“I love you too, sweet pea.”

I blink my eyes open and lock gazes with Emmett as a tear slides down my cheek. He stares at us, stoic and unmoving. There are two small lines in between his brows, as if he’s concerned but trying to mask it.

June pulls back and places her little hands on my face, wiping away my tears the way I’ve done for her before when she’s upset. This only creates another tidal wave of emotion.

“Are these happy tears?” she asks.

I give her a watery smile and whisper, “The happiest.”

I hug her once more, committing this moment to memory. Deep down, I know that this situation isn’t forever. I won’t always be June’s nanny. Emmett’s parents could come back at any moment to take my place. Or something could happen that takes me away. It makes me cherish every day with June all the more.

June sits back in her seat. I dry the remainder of my tears with my shirtsleeve. She gets her headphones on and resumes her movie. I watch her for a moment, willing myself not to cry again as an ache rises up swift and fierce. What I would give to have a daughter like her. To have a healthy family to come home to each day, one that doesn’t fight and scream all the time like mine did growing up.

A place to rest . That’s what I want. A soft place to land after dealing with my parents. The quiet of my apartment isn’t the sanctuary I once thought it would be. I want a home filled with life, laughter, and joy. With pizza nights and backyard gymnastics and tickle fights. I wrap my arms around myself, my gaze raising to Emmett’s face.

His lips barely part before closing again. He says nothing. I watch with a sore, bruised heart as he slides his headphones back on and closes his eyes once again.

I don’t know why his silence hurts so much.

Or maybe you don’t want to acknowledge why.

I bat the thought away. It doesn’t matter. We aren’t anything more than strictly boss and employee. We never will be. No matter how many times Emerson teases me about being the Beauty to Emmett’s Beast , it’s not meant to be. I’ll have to find my happily ever after somewhere else.