Page 48 of The Devastation You Reap

You shouldn't like that, a little voice says in my head.

But I did. I loved it.

Damn you, Leon Dunn. You're messing with my head.

Once I've got my heart rate somewhat back to normal, I pull my key out of my purse and let myself inside. The place is empty so I head straight to Nathan's room.

I notice that his door is slightly ajar, I knock on it lightly and hesitantly push it open. I've got no idea what he's going to say to me about what he witnessed, if he's going to be pissed that the first person he's seen me with is the exact person I said I'd never go out with. Well, not Leon specifically, but a football player. I'm not exactly quiet with my hatred of them so I can only imagine his reaction to this.

"Hey," I say, finding him sitting at his desk staring at his laptop.

"You came up for air then?"

"Christ," I mutter, threading my fingers through my hair and pulling it all back from my face.

"You know who he is right?"

"Of course. He's Leon freaking Dunn. The Panther's wide receiver. Number fourteen. A freaking football player." He cocks his brow at my excessive amount of detail. "I-I— crap." Throwing my hands up in frustration, I invite myself into his room and drop onto the end of his bed.

"You've seriously got no idea what you're doing, do you?"

Falling back, I stare at his ceiling.

"No," I confess.

"I knew something was up when I saw you getting out of his car the other night."

"Monday night was a coincidence."

"But I'm assuming tonight wasn't."

"Well, actually it kind of was but only because of our date last night."

"You went on a date with Leon Dunn?" he asks, sounding astounded.

"Yeah, why?" I ask pushing up to my elbows so I can look at him.

"He doesn't date girls."

"No, he just… he just does that in hallways." Nathan's brow lifts as if to say 'and then some.' "Yeah, I know. I know, I just…"

"Mace," he says softly, dropping down beside me. "I don't know him that well, but… you need to be careful."

"You think I don't know that? This wasn't meant to happen, Nate. I wasn't meant to fal—" He looks at me with sympathy in his eyes. I thought there might be some judgment in there too, but thankfully, all I see is just concern.

"I just don't want to see you hurt."

"Me either. I know he's not a happily ever after kinda guy, but when I'm with him… I don't know… I'm… less boring, I guess. He brings something out in me."

"You're not boring, Mace."

I hold Nathan's eyes for a beat.

"I love you, Nate, but I think we both know that's a lie. The only thing I do that doesn't involve classes or studying is volunteering."

"That doesn't mean you're boring. There's nothing wrong with being focused on the future and knowing what you want."

"Even if that means I don't experience the present?"