Page 16

16

Nash

Summoned once again to Micah’s rooms, I stand alone waiting for him as he talks to a member of The Golden Light in another part of the cabin. As much as I know I shouldn’t, I try to understand what they’re saying, but it comes through the walls and door as unintelligible mumbling.

It’s probably better that I can’t hear what they’re saying. I already know too much for my own good.

The door behind me opens, and I turn to see Nadine march in with a look of determination on her face. Great. Just what I need now. All I want to do is go back to my cabin and relax for the night. I’ve had enough of her for a lifetime.

“What are you doing here?” she asks in her usual icy way.

For a moment, I consider not answering her and instead waiting for Micah, but I know that will only result in more problems. “Micah wanted to speak to me.”

That gets me a disgusted grunt, but thankfully, she continues on her way to the door on the other side of the room. Good. Go bother Micah and whoever he’s talking to and leave me in peace.

I only get a reprieve for a minute before she and the leader of The Golden Light walk back into the room. They’re talking about something concerning the children here on the farm, but I try not to listen.

“The mothers need to be talked to, Micah. They need to make sure the children are kept under control.”

Nadine stops talking for a moment, so I look up and see Micah with his eyes closed and pinching the bridge of his nose. She doesn’t take any of that as a hint he doesn’t want to hear what she has to say right now, though, and continues her complaining.

“You know, this wouldn’t be an issue if you’d let me give the children what we give to their mothers. That’s the reason why they’re so unruly. Their mothers can’t control them because they eat the food and drink the lemonade like everyone else, but the children don’t. Not to mention it forces everyone in the kitchen to make special food for them that doesn’t have the drugs in it.”

Micah sighs and shakes his head. “I’ve made my decision on that, Nadine. The children will not get anything in their food but food. They need nutrients to grow, not drugs to keep them quiet. They’re kids. They’re supposed to be unruly sometimes. I don’t want a repeat of what happened last summer. Do you hear me? Not another child will die on this farm.”

As he says that, I remember that little blond girl who passed away last July. Micah and Nadine told all the members that she came down with a terrible flu that took her life, but all the guards knew she died because she got too much of the drug they give to all the women. I’ll never forget her mother’s wailing at the memorial service a day after her daughter died. It made my chest hurt to listen to that.

Nobody saw that member for a long time. I suspected she was quietly disposed of like all the others who’ve become a problem, but just last week I saw her smiling and happily telling other members she’s due in just a couple months.

“Fine. I understand your feelings on this,” Nadine says in a much softer tone that a moment ago. “I just wanted to keep you up to date on the issue.”

Micah waves his hand and walks toward me. “There is no issue. They’re children. Now what else do you have to tell me?”

I focus my attention on the wood floor as she sits down in a chair behind his. Sounding frustrated, she asks, “Don’t you think we should do this in private, Micah?”

As much as I agree with her, I can’t say a word to support her on this. I’d love to since I don’t like knowing so much about what’s going on behind the scenes on the farm. I much rather being simply a guard with knowledge of as little as possible regarding what goes on here.

Unfortunately, that isn’t how Micah feels about the situation.

“We are in private, Nadine.”

She doesn’t answer him but clears her throat as if to remind him I’m here.

“No need to censor yourself around Nash. He’s as loyal as they come. So what else do you need to talk to me about?”

Still staring at the floor, I can’t help but notice she hesitates for a long moment before continuing. “Fine. The new recruits will need to give us their banking information and details on anything else they own. I usually do that, as you know, but since that includes that Lara girl, it might be better if you handle it this time.”

Again, Micah sighs. “Yes, you’re probably right.”

“Don’t forget you’ll need to have them sign the papers.”

Clearly tired of this conversation, Micah snaps, “I think I know how to handle it, Nadine.”

I glance up and see her focused on me with a look that could kill. “Maybe we should have Nash here do it. He seems to get along with her.”

The expression on my face is definitely not the placid one I wish I could wear at this second. Micah notices what must be horror coming from me and walks over to pat me on the back.

“Nash is too busy doing other things for me. I’ll take care of the financial issues with the new recruits. Anything else?”

Nadine narrows her eyes in rage and asks, “What? What do you have him doing? I should know since I have to deal with any issues that crop up.”

Just like the last time I had to be here with the two of them, I feel like I’m going to be sick. I have no idea what Micah means when he says he has me doing things for him. Other than keeping an eye on Lara, nothing else has changed in my duties as a guard.

For his part, her question doesn’t seem to faze him. He sits down on that favorite chair of his and closes his eyes. I get the sense that she may want to keep talking, but for him, this meeting is over.

“I need to speak to Nash alone, so you can go, Nadine. Get me the forms they need to fill out, though. I’ll do that either tomorrow or the next day.”

And with that, she storms out, slamming the door behind her in an uncharacteristic show of anger toward our leader.

I remain silent, waiting for Micah to speak, but he seems happy to merely sit and relax with me standing in front of him. I want to tell him how happy I am to not have to deal with anything concerning financial forms with any of the new recruits. I’d do it if he told me to, but hearing him say I shouldn’t be given that task made me happier than I can express.

Finally, he opens his eyes and smiles at me. “I called you here because I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate all you do for me, Nash. As you probably know, everyday affairs here on the farm are far more complicated than they seem from the outside. In addition to making sure my people are cared for, the mundane details like who eats what and dealing with the new recruits and their financial duties to the group have to be taken care of. Between you and me, I hate that part. The mundane stuff, I mean. That’s why Nadine is so important to me. She takes all of that off my shoulders.”

He stops for a second or two before adding, “Well, usually she does. I don’t want any more problems with Lara, so this time I’ll have to take care of the financial issue. It’s important, though. This place doesn’t run on believing in ourselves and the greatness inside all of us. As much as I wish it did, in reality, The Golden Light requires the same things any large family does.”

I nod, trying to remember when the last time I thought of all of us here as a family. Maybe if Nadine didn’t walk around terrorizing everyone I might be able to bring back that feeling.

“You look tired, Nash. Is everything okay?”

Shaking my head, I smile. “I’m sure it’s just the heat.”

Micah’s eyes open wide, and he leans forward as if he wants to tell me a secret. “Speaking of that, I made sure to check on the women in the gardens after you mentioned them before. They were fine, but it’s good that you brought that to my attention.”

Sure I need to do something to change his impression that I thought he hadn’t been concerned about them, I say, “I only wanted to make sure they were given enough water. It gets so hot out in that sun all day.”

Nothing comes out the way I intended it, but thankfully, Micah doesn’t seem offended. “Do you know why I like you so much?”

I shake my head, and he answers, “Because you make me remember what The Golden Light is all about. And for that, I’m thankful, Nash.”

What he means by that I’m not sure, but I smile, hoping he truly thinks of me in that way.

He looks up toward the ceiling and lets out a heavy sigh before returning his attention to me. “I want you to know I took to heart what you said earlier about groups needing a single leader. I sense you disagree with my giving Nadine so much power.”

Oh, God. Now we’re moving into territory I absolutely don’t want to be anywhere near. Discussing Nadine can’t have any positive outcome. He thinks the world of her, and anything I say against her, no matter how true, will only come back to haunt me.

Quickly, I answer, “It’s not my place to judge you. You’re the leader of the greatest group I’ve ever been a part of. The Golden Light saved me, Micah. You saved me. When I thought I had nothing to live for, you showed me I did. I’m forever grateful for that and all that I’ve been able to find here.”

I watch his expression to see if I’ve successfully dodged explaining how I feel about Nadine. He listens intently, obviously pleased by the way I answer, and when I finish, he gives me a big smile.

“That right there. That’s why I like you so much, Nash. I’m trusting you to keep an eye on Lara for me. Do you have anything to report?”

“Not yet. She’s been busy doing what she was told to do, so I hope she’s made it over the bumpiness from her first couple days here.”

“Good. Good. I like the way you think. Go ahead and enjoy some time to yourself. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

I smile and bow. “Thank you, Micah. Have a good night.”

“You too, Nash. If anything happens, I want to know immediately, though. I don’t care what time it is. Understand?”

“Yes.”

Micah spreads his arms out wide and sighs. “You’re a good soldier. Oh, by the way, I wanted to let you know that Ramon is no longer with us.”

Sure the shock from hearing that news is written all over my face, I nod, even as sadness fills me over Ramon. He was a good guy. I thought he’d work out here.

I walk outside as I wish I knew what happened to him. Nobody leaves The Golden Light, so either he did something to himself or Micah and Nadine had him eliminated. Not that I’ll ever know.

That’s how things work here. One day you’re the favorite, and the next, you don’t exist.