Page 19 of The Book of Heartbreak

The protocols governing the mystic conclave renowned among those who possess the pure eye as ‘the Hidden’ are intricate.

Nevertheless, through my extensive interactions with a multitude of seers throughout Anatolia, I have managed to unravel their involvement in certain events.

The most plausible explanations of many enigmas lie in their intervention.

But the reasons that these entities, whose powers transcend the ordinary bounds of human capability, choose to keep the countless curses in our world remains a mystery.

Excerpt from The Book of Betrayal, Müneccimbasi Sufi Chelebi’s Journals of Mystical Phenomena

When we finally emerge from the tower, the intensity of the sun has waned.

After finding my own face looking back at me from The Book of Heartbreak , a sense of suffocation overtook me.

I stumbled, unable even to walk, and was forced to take Leon’s arm as we climbed the stairs after leaving the book locked in a drawer in his office.

Now I can breathe again, but the dread remains on my chest. I’m fully aware that my arm still clings to Leon’s. But unlike me, he doesn’t seem bothered by our physical closeness; he’s too distracted to notice.

‘I think,’ he says, with a furrowed brow, ‘you need to tell me why you’re here.’

It hurts my pride to admit how perplexed I am, when he sounds so sure of himself. It’s almost my turn to tell him, ‘Not everything is as it seems, Leon Dumano?lu,’ but I can’t find the energy to speak.

I refrain from sharing the eerie feeling of déjà vu I felt upon arriving at the tower. I don’t trust Leon – what am I to him, if not another enigma to solve? A job. A tool he can use to have more power in his world.

I quiver as I recall Munu’s warnings. He’ll unearth the curse and seek ways to turn it to his benefit.

‘Are you okay, Silverbirch?’ Leon’s voice is soft as velvet beneath the sound of the gulls. Since we revealed the maiden’s image, he looks at me . . . differently.

Don’t let him fool you, Munu murmurs in my head again. He’s an arrogant, cocky, power-hungry seer. He will explode your heart.

‘Maybe,’ I admit, though my voice betrays me. The wind catches my hair, sending it billowing over my shoulders. What’s the point in pretending? ‘Not really.’

Why would the maiden, Theodora of House Doukas, bear such a resemblance to me?

And if Theodora really was cursed, did she also die every time her heart was broken?

My head pounds with questions, as if I’m being bludgeoned with them, but the worst thing is that Leon appears to be convinced now that I’m somehow linked to this book.

It doesn’t make sense. The room was dimly lit, and it was just a drawing. Perhaps, if I go back and look at it, Theodora won’t look so much like me.

‘I have a theory, if you want to hear it.’ Leon leads me to a bench facing the sea. Back in his office, he insisted on keeping the book. Considering his almost two-year quest for it, and the queasiness it induced in me, I had no choice but to accept.

‘Fine,’ I mumble as we take our seats. I gently withdraw myself from Leon’s radius, only to immediately yearn to reconnect.

Below us, the waves lap gently against the rocks, their rhythm soothing as a lullaby.

I take the opportunity to study Leon’s profile: the curve of his nose, his defined jawline. And, as I study him, I feel my heart shift to a strange rhythm. I redirect my focus to the endless motion of the waves.

‘You are somehow linked to the maiden and you want to know how to break curses.’ He leans towards me, his shoulder brushing mine.

It feels too intimate to feel the warmth of his skin, still I don’t shrink away.

Perhaps I’m too paralysed. Perhaps I don’t want to.

‘You’re different . Certainly not as ordinary as you claim to be.

I can feel it. Maybe one of your parents had the pure eye? ’

Of course I’m different, my heart is cursed.

‘I don’t think I have seers in my lineage.’ I clear my throat. ‘And there’s nothing different about me. I’m a perfectly normal person.’

I wish.

‘The issue is, my intuition is rarely wrong,’ Leon says. He looks at me like I’m a puzzle he’s determined to solve, and I can’t stand it. The best way to make him believe a lie is to tell him the truth, I decide. At least parts of it.

‘You were right,’ I tell him. ‘I know nothing about your craft, or the significance of it. I have no idea why this book decided to appear for me. I have nothing to do with any missions from the Otherside. I just want to . . . survive Istanbul.’ It’s not a lie, I reassure myself.

‘And what about your sassy little Tinkerbell?’

‘Munu is my guardian. She was always here, since I was very little, so I’m not really sure why you’re so obsessed with her permit.’

He considers my confession.

‘That book.’ I attempt to change the subject. ‘ The Book of Heartbreak . You said it was the end of the great Sufi Chelebi. What happened to him?’

‘Well, I have to read it, to be sure. But it’s rumoured that after meeting the maiden to end her curse, Sufi Chelebi made the mistake of falling in love with her. She was dead, and he was alive. It rendered him mad.’

‘Because he fell in love?’

‘With the wrong person.’ Leon nods. ‘Love can be dangerous for seers. If you fall for someone who you can’t have, or who wouldn’t love you back, it can become an obsession, clouding the pure eye. Like poor Chelebi, triggering his own downfall . . . Just because he couldn’t command his heart.’

‘Fucking hell,’ I gasp. I can’t see how any of this relates to me, yet the fact that Sufi Chelebi was in love with a girl who could be my twin leaves me oddly unnerved, as does Leon’s seeming composure as he so blithely relates Sufi Chelebi’s journey to insanity.

As if the guy ended up with a speeding ticket or an upset stomach, and not the ultimate catastrophe.

‘Do seers often go mad?’ I enquire cautiously. ‘You describe it like an occupational hazard.’

He weighs my question, as if trying to decide whether I’m mocking him or not. ‘Depends how good you are,’ he says, after a short pause. ‘But yes, you could say that. Seers who have visions both asleep and awake are more prone to insanity. Just like Sufi Chelebi . . . and me.’

I’m dying to learn more, but I hold my tongue. It’s none of your business, Sare, I tell myself.

‘Anyway—’ He tucks a curl behind his ear.

‘Before his pure eye abandoned him, Sufi documented the phenomenon of certain recurring curses, where a mortal is doomed to be reborn repeatedly, each time bearing the same misfortunes. And my theory is . . . Well . . . If Theodora looks like you, then maybe she is you . . . Or rather, you were—’

‘You think I’m the maiden?’ I interrupt, bewildered. ‘Like . . . a reincarnation?!’

‘Not an elegant way to describe it,’ he grunts. ‘But roughly, yes.’

‘Seriously?’ A brittle laugh escapes me. ‘That’s your theory – that I’m some long-dead girl reborn?’

‘Why else would the book reveal itself to you and not to me?’ His tone carries a tinge of arrogance.

‘Well, perhaps it’s because you’re shit at your job,’ I retort with a scowl. ‘Especially considering your far-fetched theories. Lucky, I’d say, as it means you won’t go mad if you fall in love.’

A gull swoops past Leon, alarmingly close. I flinch, yet he remains unfazed, both by the near miss of the wings and my biting remarks. ‘I need to consult Grey,’ he says.

‘Who’s Grey?’ I feel encouraged by how, unlike Munu, Leon speaks of the Otherside freely. ‘Are they your boss?’

‘Does your friend have a boss, then? Who is it?’ Leon seizes the opportunity to strike at me with another question.

I’m quick to reply, ‘I don’t know.’

The cheeky bastard grins. ‘Funny how you describe your relationship with your ethereal as a friendship, yet your trusted friend doesn’t bother telling you who she works for.’ Leon’s lopsided smile sends my thoughts reeling. How can he be so attractive and annoying at the same time?

‘It’s forbidden to speak of them,’ I assert, folding my arms.

‘It’s forbidden to speak their true titles, or their core intentions,’ he says, his voice laced with playful mockery.

‘But clever clues can paint vivid pictures, don’t you think, Silverbirch?

You seem bright enough.’ He leans in, his minty breath carried on his whisper, causing my cheeks to glow at our closeness.

‘Imagine – who could your friend be aligned with, if she’s accusing me of consorting with their eternal rivals, the devils.

It brings to mind thoughts of halos . . . and wings . . . doesn’t it?’

I suck in the air as shock floods over me like a tide.

Halos. Wings. Beings that forge fate and destiny and death.

How foolish I’ve been all these years, assuming that Munu belonged to a gang of fairy godmothers in a strange place called the Otherside, disregarding all of her remarks about her boss being in the Heavens. Leon even mentioned them that first day we met – and I just ignored him. ‘No . . .’

‘Yes,’ Leon says.

‘Angels?’ I can barely breathe.

‘Precisely,’ Leon confirms with a nod. ‘Mortals or ethereals usually can’t speak of them, as most will be notified when they’re spoken about.

Think of it like a tracker app on your phone.

Hence “the Hidden”. But if you write about them, they can’t trace you.

So your friend, I’m sure, had plenty of chances to pass you information. ’

I mull over his claim. Munu, my Munu, has served divine beings who supposedly stand for justice and mercy all along?

But why would she deliberately pass up the chance to tell me more about them – or what they have to do with my curse?

The thought of her boss and the punishments she’s constantly threatened with churns in my stomach like sour milk.

‘And how come you can speak so freely?’ I lean back, exhausted by my confusion.

‘Because I’m blessed.’ Leon straightens on the bench. ‘I proved my worth to Grey, and he’s given me his blessing.’