Page 31 of That Same Old Love

Mahi was just about to sit down for her evening snack when her bell rang. Samrat had gotten that fixed along with adding some ridiculous security measures around her house. What did he think that the seniors in the neighborhood would try and attack her during the night? She shook her head smiling.

Although in the past weeks, Samrat had sneaked into her house for a few hours, she missed holding him and sleeping with him during the nights.

She often saw Ananya in the balcony or outside Samrat’s house and waved to her. Ananya in her classic manner would just stare blankly, as though she were in middle of contemplating the global warming issue, and didn’t want to be disturbed until she found a resolution.

She knew Samrat was getting impatient and he growled out his threats often, to drag her to his sister and get the conversation started. But she had been putting it off, not finding the right moment to break the ice between Ananya and herself.

“I don’t expect a friendship bracelet from her. But would it kill her to smile at me once in a while?” she muttered while removing the two safety latches and then two hard locks.

She opened the door absently, preoccupied in her own thoughts, only to stare at the person in front of her.

“Sidhu?” she blurted out in shock.

Sidhu smiled at her. “Oh hi, Mahi. I was just driving by, and ever since you returned, I was thinking of meeting you. Can I come in?”

She blinked a couple of times before nodding at him with a slight frown and then letting him in.

“Hmm something smells nice in here. Oh wow vadas?” Sidhu asked excitedly, looking at the snack plate on her coffee table.

Mahi just nodded, still wondering why he dropped by at her place to meet her all of a sudden after nearly eleven months of her returning back to India.

She sat opposite to him while he was helping himself to her vadas along with the chutney she had made using her aunt’s recipe.

“Hey that was mine!” she told him in a mock angry tone that she had used when they were in college.

Sidhu looked at her sheepishly after he almost finished all the vadas. “I remember how I used to finish all your home packed lunches. Your aunt was a great cook. As soon as I saw you, the first thing I did was to grab your lunch and then run away with it,” he reminded her, flashing his dimples.

Seeing Sidhu’s mischievous smile reminded her of the boy she had fallen madly in love with when she was eighteen.

She smiled recalling one of their first conversations with each other, just after four weeks of college.

“So Mahi, what are we naming our children? You know, after five years of marriage, when I feel I have spent sufficient alone time with you, I want us to have a daughter who looks just like you, and then later, after a few more years, a son who looks as handsome as me,” a guy asked her.

She was shocked and then pissed that a strange guy would dare to speak so freely with her and that too about having children with her. “What? How dare you—” she began, about to rip him to pieces.

The guy’s eyes twinkled with humor. “Based on your frequent looks towards me these past four weeks, I figured you liked what you saw, and so did I. So, why waste time? We should be together, it’s meant to be… ” he said, winking at her.

She didn’t particularly like good looking guys, especially ones who knew they were good looking and were cocky. And this one was in a league of his own.

“Sidhant… is it? You are nothing special. There are a lot of better looking guys than you, and they are even humble, unlike you,” she scoffed, even though it was a lie.

He was stunningly good looking and he knew it. She and the other girls couldn’t take their eyes off him whenever he was around.

He broke into another gorgeous grin, “Oh really? Let’s come back to this topic after a month or so and then see what you have to say at that time. And Mahi… by then… you’ll call me Sidhu,” he promised her.

After a couple of months, she gave in to Sidhu’s wooing, because he was genuinely sweet and mischievous, while also being understanding of her various hang-ups.

Sidhu had often teased her saying that he wanted to marry her, mostly because she had an aunt who knew how to make the best South Indian food.

Mahi, smiled. “I do remember you eating my food. Maybe that was the reason why I stayed slim during our college days. You always ate my lunch and I had to end up buying crappy cafeteria food.”

What Sidhu didn’t know was that she had specifically requested her aunt to pack Sidhu’s favorite dishes in her lunch box.

Sidhu laughed. “I even ate your food when we went to restaurants with our friends. You had to literally beat me away to get something to eat. But then you were such a slow eater while I inhaled my food.”

She laughed remembering those times. Sidhu used to say “ Sorry my sweetie,” and order another dish for her and promptly finish that too before she had eaten enough. She indulged him often, but when she was too hungry, she simply ordered non-vegetarian dishes that he didn’t eat.

“I have some more vadas. Just made a few batches since I got a sudden craving.”

“Sure. I would love some, if you don’t mind. I’m sorry, it’s one of my favorite and only Anu knows how to make the best South Indian chutneys in my house. Since she has been gone, I have been craving for some homemade tiffins.”

Mahi nodded smiling at his shameless self-invite. She got him another plate full of vadas which he proceeded to eat quickly.

“So what’s happening between you and Ananya? I don’t want to pry, but since you are here; I wanted to ask you if I can help in anyway. Not that I’m in anyway qualified to give marriage advice.”

Sidhu finished eating and sighed loudly.

“She thinks I’m still in love with you and wants you and me to rekindle our romance,” he told her with a pained expression.

Mahi frowned. “Is she crazy? Why would she think that? Since I’ve gotten back, we barely met once.”

“I know! But somehow she has gotten it into her head that I am not over you.”

She was surprised. “Why haven’t you clarified it to her then? Do you not tell her that you love her?”

Sidhu looked frustrated. “I have been telling her that I love her each and every day. She’s mad to think that I don’t love her,”

Mahi looked thoughtful. “Maybe it’s not enough. Sometimes you need to be more convincing. Talk is cheap.”

She remembered how telling someone you loved them wasn’t enough. Dinesh had yelled, abused, and then hit her sometimes only to apologize later saying that he loved her. It didn’t mean anything. In fact she hated hearing that word from his mouth.

Sidhu looked annoyed. “What? That doesn’t even make any sense. And what would you know about love anyway?” he said and scoffed loudly.

At that remark, both of them froze and felt the atmosphere in the room shift. Rather than remember their happy memories together, they recalled the time when she abandoned him callously and then his anguish later.

Mahi looked stricken. “Sidhu… I know this is coming out way too late, but I’m sorry for what I did to you.

There is just no excuse for what I did. But…

I didn’t break up with you properly because I just didn’t think I would be able to give you up that easily.

I knew that if I saw you or even heard your voice, I would break down and refuse to do what my parents wanted me to do.

It was one of the hardest and the most cowardly thing I have ever done to a person, and I’m ashamed that I did that to someone I had loved with all my heart,” she said, looking at him imploringly.

Sidhu knew he didn’t love Mahi anymore, but he was never able to get over her betrayal. He wanted some kind of closure that would allow him to be free of the painful memories.

“After you left me, did you ever think of me Mahi? Did you ever feel the same pain as I did?”

Mahi looked at Sidhu, and flinched at the pain she saw as he recalled those memories. “Yes Sidhu. I did think of you. I thought about you for a very, very long time… you have no idea how much and for how long… ”

He scoffed. “Yes. You must have thought about me as a fool you spent your college days to pass your time with.”

Mahi shook her head. “No Sidhu. I did think of you in spite of wanting to forget you very badly. You haunted me for a very very long time… “

She looked him in the eye. “Each time my husband abused me… I missed you very badly… I kept thinking that my Sidhu would have treated me with respect and love. And each time I miscarried and was left alone to mourn by myself… I missed you even more… I kept thinking that… my Sidhu would have hugged me, consoled me, and then mourned the loss of our baby together with me… I even chose another man to have a relationship with, only because he reminded me so much of you, and I wanted to so badly redo and wipe away my mistake of giving you up.”

She smiled sadly. “But I stopped missing you or thinking about you the day my son was born. As I held him in my arms, I let go of your ghost to move on, and I had room only for him in my heart. I was happy and didn’t need anyone else to take care of him or me.

My son passed away eventually, but he left me enough memories to fill my heart. ”

Sidhu felt bad for the proud and brave woman in front of him. Mahi had been so spirited and full of life when they were together. Listening to her life experiences made him feel petty, especially considering how quickly and how deeply he had fallen in love with Ananya.

“I’m sorry, Mahi. I didn’t mean to remind you of your painful memories.”

“That’s okay. I just wanted to apologize to you on what I did to you so I can clear part of my conscience.”

He nodded. “It was a long time ago Mahi. We were young then and we all make mistakes. I had forgiven you a while ago.”

She smiled at him. “I knew you would. And enough of my pity party. So tell me why you are actually here, then?”

“I already told you—”

“Sidhant Shah, I know all about your plans and schemes remember? We were both like two peas in the same pod. The only difference was that your schemes and actions weren’t malicious or mean spirited.

You were always pulling some or other silly tricks on me during our time together. Now spill,” Mahi said firmly.

Sidhu shook his head smiling at her accurate deductions, although most of the current plan had been Samrat’s idea. Sidhu was just going to take it a step further to get Anu to react more. His mere presence wasn’t going to get Anu to react as much as what he was about to do later.

“Nothing, Mahi. I uh just needed some advice from a friend on how to convince Anu to get back to me.”

Mahi narrowed her eyes at him, not buying his bullshit. “Okay. So anyway, if you really love your wife, why would she suspect you still have feelings for me?” she asked him curiously.

Sidhu looked frustrated. “I don’t know. I loved you when we were together. And with you, my love started with an attraction and then it was more of being with a similar likeminded person who wanted to escape our stifling families.

But with Anu, it was different.

When Anu and I got married; I started to fall in love with her almost immediately.

She was so brave and courageous; she didn’t really want to escape from life or reality even when it was rough for her.

She had the most difficult pregnancy and childbirth, but she never even complained once.

She was pregnant and huge with my child in her stomach during her last year of college, but she still attended classes and gave all her exams. She got along with the most difficult people from my family and tolerates them by living in a joint family.

She did all this while raising our child and managing a successful career for herself. She is such a brave and strong partner who is also soft and desirable at the same time.”

Mahi smiled at the awe and love she saw in Sidhu’s eyes when he spoke about Ananya.

“Then tell her all that you fool. Women want specifics. Tell her that and then convince her that there can be no one else than her in your life,” Mahi suggested.

Sidhu nodded and checked his phone for messages. “I need to leave now. Thank you for the food and for listening to me.”

“Anytime, Sidhu. I’m relieved as well that we both have gotten our closures. I sincerely want you to be happy with Ananya. And I’ve already met Srishti. She’s a great girl. You and Ananya have done a great job with her,” said Mahi earnestly.

Sidhu smiled. “Yes. Srishti told me about meeting you several times. I’m glad she has you as her friend.”

Mahi went outside to see Sidhu off when she spied Ananya on Samrat’s balcony.

Ananya looked shocked and then crushed when she saw Sidhu coming out from Mahi’s house. Samrat had very casually mentioned a while ago to Ananya that he saw Sidhu’s car outside and asked if she had driven it there.

Before Mahi could react, Sidhu dragged her close in a bear hug and held her for a while.

Mahi was shocked for a few seconds, and then, “I’m going to kill you Sidhu,” she hissed in his ear, figuring out her role in the charade.

“Is Anu watching us hug?”

“You know damn well she is,” she answered him with annoyance.

He released her. “Thanks Mahi for the help. I hope we meet again soon. Say hi to Samrat when you see him,” he told her grinning and got into his car before driving away.