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Chapter Forty-Seven

FALLON

“Okay, so will you please tell me this big, secretive plan you have for my party?”

Drea told me weeks ago she was planning my twenty-fifth birthday party. I begged her every chance I could to tell me what it was, but she wouldn’t budge.

“For the last time, no! It’s a surprise, love. It means, arrive and find out!”

I looked to Kaia for any sort of help, but she held her hands up in surrender. “I’ve been sworn to secrecy, sorry. Can we at least tell her where it’s going to be, Drea? She needs to know that much, right?”

I nodded in agreement. “Yes, I need to know where it is, and what to wear. Also who will be there, and?—”

“Nice try. Just look hot, but not like some lady of the night. It’s a small gathering, and no, Cara won’t be there. I did invite a few people from your party that you know, but it’s low-key, I promise.”

“Okay, so you said you’re picking me up, but where are we going?!” I needed answers, dammit!

Before I could get those answers, a delivery man walked in the door with the most gorgeous bouquet of flowers.

“Oh, someone’s getting lucky tonight!” I yelled at Drea as I ran over to the flowers and smelled them. “Dahlia’s, my favorite. I’m so jealous, Dre.”

“I have a flower delivery for… Sunshine?” I froze, my nose stuck in the flowers.

Drea came up quickly beside me. “I’m sorry, there’s no one here by that name.”

“Drea, it’s fine,” I said softly, standing up and taking the flowers with a faint smile. “Thank you, sir.” I tipped the delivery man before he left.

I walked the flowers to the counter and sat them down, taking the card out. Before I could read it, she snatched it from my hands.

“It most certainly is not fine, Fallon Rose. Sunshine died, and she is not coming back. These flowers are for a ghost.”

I rolled my eyes reaching for the card, but she kept it just out of reach. “Drea, please give me the card.”

“Why? Why do you even need to read what’s on there? Would you believe it after everything?”

I sighed. “I won’t know that until I read it. I didn’t even give her the chance to explain, and when I talked to Harper?—”

“Harper is her blood relative! Of course she’s going to tell you to hear out her cheating, asshole of a sister—it’s her job!”

“I know, Drea. And I know Harper already kicked her ass when we broke up. She isn’t taking sides, I just... give me the damn card!”

She relinquished her grip on the card and handed it over, but not without a huff of irritation escaping her. “I swear to all that is gay, if you give her any of your time, I will rip your nipple piercings right out!”

“Ouch.” Kaia winced and folded her arms across her chest.

“Drea, you should’ve opened a theater, not a bookstore. Your dramatic nature is a gift.”

I opened the envelope and unfolded the little card inside. Walking over to one of the couches, I sat down when I saw her hand writing and read the first line:

You’ll always be the sunshine that brings the rainbow after a rainy day.

I pushed through the rest of the card, barely able to read through the tears. It was just one line, but... it was her.

Seeing her handwriting felt like holding her hand again and reconnecting with a part of her:

I hope there is still room left in your heart for me,

and that you’ll give me the chance to explain.

I can never say I’m sorry enough for causing you so much pain.

No, I didn’t mean for that to rhyme, but I hope it made you smile.

You deserve everything in life and more.

It was always just you, and it will only ever be just you.

Happy birthday, Fallon.

I will love you until my last breath.

Always,

Your Wildcat.

I put down the card and let out a sobbed laugh. Drea came to sit next to me and I put my head in her lap as I let the tears fall. My Wildcat…

“Do you want me to invite her, love?” she grumbled while stroking my hair.

I sat up, wiping the tears from my eyes. “No. I can’t see her, not yet. It’s just too hard, and I don’t know what to say.”

I handed her the card and let her read it. “Damn that bitch and her love for you!” she yelled. “I hate her, but I also kind of want to hug her. Are you going to let her know you got the flowers, at least? They’re your favorite.”

I started crying again. “Fuck her! She knows those are my favorite, and she knows how to make me smile, even when I hate her. I can’t talk to her, Dre. Can you please text her or something?”

“Of course, love. For all this emotional damage, I’ll give you an early birthday present and tell you where your party’s going to be. Drumroll, please.”

I laughed as she imitated a drumroll. “You’re going to party the night away, at Pinstripes !”

I gasped. “What? No fucking way! That’s so expensive to rent out! Drea, that’s too much.”

She waved me off and stood me up. “Hush now. It’s you we’re talking about—nothing’s too much, babe.”

I thanked her, and she hugged me so tight I thought my eyes would pop out. “I can’t thank you enough, Drea. You’ve been with me through everything. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” She smiled and kissed the top of my head before getting back to work.

Later that afternoon, I was heading home from the bookstore after a long day. I decided to grab some Chinese takeout—it was easier than cooking a meal that only I would enjoy.

The best part about my new apartment was the Chinese restaurant, The Golden Dragon , just around the corner. Best egg rolls ever!

“Hold on, Mom, I’m just walking in the door.”

As soon as I got home, my mom called. Even though my hands were full with dinner, I still answered the phone—I would never miss a call with her if I could help it.

“Okay, I’m inside. How are you?”

“I’m good, dear. How are you? Caleb says he misses you.”

I sat on the couch and propped my feet on the table. “I’m doing okay. I just got home from the bookstore. Tell Caleb I love him, and I miss him, too.”

I was grateful to see my family over the holiday, but I was starting to miss them again.

“He’s in bed right now, but I’ll tell him tomorrow. Are you doing anything for your birthday? I’m sorry we can’t be there this year. Ticket prices aren’t what they used to be, and your brother is starting soccer this spring.”

“Drea planned a small party at this really nice place downtown. It’s okay, I understand. It sucks you guys won’t be here, but we can FaceTime so you don’t miss it. My little brother is growing up so much. I can’t believe it!”

“That he is, honey. That sounds wonderful. I’m sure you girls will have a great time. Did you invite… you know who?”

I sighed. I had told her what happened during one of our phone calls. She wouldn’t stop raving about Mackenzie after we visited for Thanksgiving. I was so angry, and I couldn’t take her talking about it anymore. I kind of lost my temper and shouted. I quickly apologized and told her everything.

“Uh, no, I didn’t invite her. She sent me a card and my favorite flowers today, actually.” I still couldn’t stop thinking about the flowers as I looked at them on my kitchen counter.

I stayed with Drea for about a month before I found this small one-bedroom apartment. It wasn’t as nice as my last one, but it was livable and in a safe neighborhood.

Drea’s house was big enough for me, but I wanted her to have her space back, and I needed my own, too. With Skylar there most nights, Drea’s house was too... loud.

I didn’t know if I should call Mackenzie or not to thank her for the flowers. I knew it was the polite thing to do, but I was afraid to hear her voice. I didn’t know what to say, and after seeing her at the coffee shop, I definitely was afraid to be anywhere near her.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss her or constantly want to pick up the phone and call her. Every time I went into Brewed Awakening , I asked Rylee how she was doing. I knew I shouldn’t, but I needed to know. Was she seeing someone? Did she talk about me? All the questions I had, I was too afraid to ask.

“Oh, well, that was sweet of her, right?”

I smiled. “Yeah, Mom, it was,” I said softly.

Aside from the coffee shop, I hadn’t seen her since we broke up. She tried calling a few times but gave up after a week when I didn’t answer. There was nothing to talk about, and I needed time to figure things out.

“Are you going to call her to thank her for the flowers? I don’t want to pry, but you said you talked to her sister. Maybe she was right, and you should at least hear her out and get some closure. It’s been a few months, sweetie.”

I groaned. “Mom, I’m not going to call her. At least not right now. I need to figure some things out. After Rebecca, I don’t know if I want to hear her out, no matter what Harper or the card said.”

“What did the card say, honey?” I read it to her, and she let out the longest, “Aww,” I’d ever heard.

“Oh my God, Mom, seriously?”

“I’m sorry, honey, but that was sweet. But listen, if you hate her, so do I. I still think you need closure, though.”

Did I hate her? I wasn’t so sure anymore. After the anger and hurt faded a bit, I started thinking. I tried not to think too much about her, or I’d fall apart all over again. But my mom was right, I still hadn’t let her explain. Regardless of whether I knew what I saw or not, I needed to hear it from her to close that chapter of my life and move on.

“Thanks, Mom. I’m still angry, but I don’t know if I hate her. The only person I could ever hate is my real dad. Besides, if you want to like her, that’s fine. I won’t get in the way of that.”

“Oh, honey, I loved her, but when she broke my baby’s heart, she broke mine too. Oh, listen, I have to go, sweetie. Someone’s at the door. I love you, and I’ll talk to you soon. Goodnight, baby.”

And with that, she hung up. I threw my head back on the couch and groaned.