Page 13 of Size King

“Yes, I’m still the CEO and owner of the company, ass,” I say, insulted. “I’m always on time and on my shit. You know that. Pussy never slows me down.”

“Everyone can sense that spark between you two, you know?” Adam informs me. “Even if you aren’t flirting, which you do constantly, it’s so clear that you’re both attracted to each other. It’s stupid and fuckingillogical, but… it’s hard for me to judge. I fuck just as many girls as you do.”

“This is why you’re my best mate, and I respect you,” I say with another clap on his shoulder. “Dude, I can’t hide my longing for her. She’sfantastic.”

“Boy, she must be good,” Adam says.

“Did we make a mistake?” I wonder of Kate and me.

“Yes,” Adam answers for me. “You both made a big mistake, and you can’t afford to make it again, even once more. You hear me?”

“Do you think I only hired her because I’m insanely into her?”

“Why are you asking me a bunch of easy questions you have the answers to?” Adam laughs. “Get ready for that damn board meeting and don’t get yourself ousted! I like you running the show! Don’t have them put me in charge.”

“Right, because you wouldn’t ejaculate in your pants over that opportunity,” I say with assurance. “You know, you should be backing my sex life with Kate. I get hot, secret sex for a while, and if we get caught and it ruins my career, you’ll inherit the kingdom. You wouldn’t do such a bad job running the place, man. You’ve practically been doing it with me since I started this whole operation.”

“Don’t be so gay,” he replies. “Good luck with those old shitheads later.”

* * *

The board meetswith me on time in Conference Room D. We shake hands, exchange the usual meaningless, trivial pleasantries, and we take our seats. The six of them sit in front of me, and I sit alone.

Usually, only two or three of them will speak during these meetings, but this time, only the really old one, Howard, speaks for the group.

“The media is still making you out to be quite a scoundrel, Aiden,” says Howard. “They say you’re an animal, a sadist, a rich asshole that enjoys harassing women. Forget that these labels are still, to my knowledge, unjustified.”

“They are,” I assure the board.

“Nonetheless, we are highly appalled by the company that you chose to keep, Aiden,” says Howard. “Hiring this demented woman, Sarah Blackburn, was a horrible mistake in the first place! Why did you hire Sarah? Or Kate Harly? Were those girls willing to suck your dick?”

“Howard, that kind of talk is unnecessary—”

“It very well is not, goddamn it!” he roars. “You’ve put the entire company in quite a predicament, man. What were you thinking?”

“Please just say what you need to say,” I say, meeting his gaze.

“Well, we here on the board are all split,” Howard says. “We aren’t really sure how to handle all of this, at least, not right now. We’re letting your cleanup crew do their thing and hoping that they’ll produce results soon.”

“They will,” I assure them.

“We just want this shitstorm to go away, Aiden,” Howard growls.

“I know, and I want that too, more than anything,” I respond. “It will go away.”

“How can you be so certain?” he wonders. “There’s only so much you or anyone else here at this company can do to help put out this fire. Do you know something we don’t?”

“I know that people are more willing to forgive than you think,” I say with confidence. “I think Kate Harly is already proving herself and fitting in with Tech Wreck very well.”

“We hate to agree with you, but you’re right about that,” Howard says. “We like Kate. She’s doing exceptional PR work for being so young. How old is she, twenty-two?”

“Twenty-six,” I correct.

“She looks younger than that,” Howard remarks. “Nonetheless, we thought that it was ahorriblemove to hire Harly at first.”

“I figured you might,” I say.

“But with her great performance so early in the game, I think we’ve come to see just how smart a decision it was to hire her after all. If you and her can actually somehow, miraculously,magicallyturn your image back around to where it needs to be, we’ll keep backing you as CEO.”