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“ W hat the fuck were you thinking?” I snarl at my best friend. “When I gave you permission to join him, I certainly didn’t figure you’d give your fucking life!”

“Calm down, Lio.” Benjamin’s voice is hoarse, which only pisses me off more. “It was my choice. He needed to get his anger out. Just like you, he works better when he's calm. And I love him enough to give him that!”

“Love,” I scoff, pacing around the doctor’s room, but not taking anything in. “You thought you loved Ignacio until recently. You still have unresolved feelings there. Now you’re telling me you’re so much in love with that Amato that you’re happy to skip to your death? And fucking leave me!”

Benjamin flushes, whether in embarrassment or shame, I have no idea. To be honest, I don’t give a fuck. He’s supposed to be my goddamn Second. Instead, he just goes off thinking it’s a good idea to die?

“You know it’s not that easy. And it’s impossible to control feelings. If it was, you wouldn’t have fallen for Allesandro after everything he did.” Benjamin clutches the sheet and tries to move, but I skewer him with a glare that stops him.

“You cannot compare what Master did to that fucking psycho. Not once did he put my life at risk. Not once did he strangle me to the point I may not live. You. Fucking. Played. With. Your. Life.” I move towards him, scowling, as I feel like I’m about to vibrate out of my skin. “Where are your friendship rules? Where is the promise you made me after we got you back from Jax? I promised you forever, and you promised me it as well! Am I no longer important enough?”

Benjamin goes white at the reminder, and while I feel a flash of satisfaction, I hate that it’s come to this. Fucking Amatos. I thought I could trust them. Fuck . This goes too far.

I want to raze it all to the ground. One match to destroy their world. I can find Il Padrone on my own. They aren’t allies. They’re fucking enemies .

“Lio…I still love you, too. This just happened. I know you’re hurt, but I am still here. I’ll always be here.”

I snort in disbelief and hold the water to him when his voice almost gives out. Despite my anger, I still love the fucking asshole. Why? I have no fucking clue.

“You don’t love me. Even though I love you. Your friendship rules. The way we had each other’s back. But you walked away, and I won’t forget it. Ever.”

I put the water back and whirl around, unable to even look at my friend. Maybe ex-friend . Fuck, I don’t know. He’s the one who has always helped with my emotions, and now he’s betrayed everything we had. Ripping out my heart like it’s nothing.

“I can’t make you believe it, but I’ll show you.”

“You’ll fucking show me?! You did! You showed me that you’d rather die than be my friend. Than be my Second. Than help me find Master. Than…” I choke on my words as I turn around. My hands are shaking and I stumble back, unable to get anything else out.

Destruction. That’s what I need. I need payment…in fucking blood.

The door bursts open and I have my fucking chance as Tennant rushes in, glaring at me. I don’t bother to think, the knife is in my hand and flying out of it quicker than I can even process. Tennant growls as he ducks, but it still manages to lodge itself in his shoulder.

I smile, grabbing another knife, because he didn’t even slow down. There’s not a sound of pain, and there needs to be one. It turns out blood payment wasn’t enough…

Tennant grabs the knife out of my hand, tossing it aside as Benjamin tries to shout. I have no fucking clue what he's saying, but hell, it better not be him begging for this fucker’s life.

I push against Tennant, who is immovable. His hands grab my wrists, as if he’s actively trying not to hurt me. Fucker doesn’t have the decency to deal with me one-on-one.

“You need to calm down. You’re bothering my Topolino. I will not stand for you yelling at him.”

Hissing at him when he squeezes my wrists more, I go to hook my leg between us when another voice descends. It freezes me immediately. “Lio! You will stop—right this minute. This is not becoming of a Boss.”

Cringing, I stare around Tennant at Keegan. Fuck . Now I know I’m in major trouble. I pull away from Tennant as I switch my attention to Keegan. I would have thought, after being involved in Ignacio’s punishment, he’d back away. Instead, he’s coming right at me. That fucking disappointed look is too similar to Il Padrone’s.

“You have no idea what’s going on,” I respond, proud of myself for keeping my voice level.

“Oh no. I heard what happened. That's why I came.” He darts a glance toward Tennant. “I agree, you have every right to be pissed. But this isn’t the way to go about it. You know if you kill any Amato, we’re going to be fighting more than one war, not to mention I’m not ready for Sarah to come down on us all. It's a bad idea.”

I blink rapidly, the threat of Dr. Ranlen only partially invading my thoughts. Fuck . I really want to kill these motherfuckers. Keegan’s calm voice irks me, but I’m beginning to accept that I can’t just kill them all. Although I reserve the right to kill Tennant when the time comes.

“Fine,” I say curtly. “Let’s get Benjamin and go home.”

“I think—” Benjamin starts, but on seeing my cutting glare, he shuts up. Which is a good fucking idea right now.

Keegan helps him up, and manages to bundle us all together, shielding us so that we’re not at risk of any repercussions from my actions. Like the whole “make Tennant bleed” thing. Granted, the fucker just smiled at me, even after I stabbed him.

I don’t say a word to any of the Amatos as we leave, even though Roman tries to talk to me. I just want to go home. And I fucking want my Master. I desperately need him to be here, to put me on my knees and take this pain away.