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A s a parent, the worst thing is seeing your child in pain and not being able to do anything about it.

Seeing Roman bark orders, pacing back and forth behind the desk with the phone to his ear as he tries to coordinate our people, while also keeping a bead on the lawyers and police, trying to get any hint of what might be going on, fills me with both pride and dread. He’s coming into his own so well, but the reasons why he’s had to take on such a role before he was ready are devastating.

If you didn’t know him, you would think Roman had it all under control, but I can see it. The way his entire body is strung taut as he holds the weight of the Family on his slender shoulders. There’s a darkness in his green eyes that scares me, and a hopelessness that has been creeping in with each passing day. This was a blow nobody needed. Too bad assholes don’t ask opinions when they go about ruining your life.

Roman hangs up the phone and plants his hands on the desk. Leaning over the surface, his head drops down and his entire body shakes as he lets out a sob that he’s held in for far longer than I thought he would.

Jude tries to comfort him, but Roman pushes him away, and it breaks me to the very core of who I am as a father to see my son so broken.

“There’s nothing they can do now,” Roman says between heavy, body shaking cries. “It’s too early, and they’re still in the middle of processing them. We’ll know more in the morning, but who the fuck knows what will happen by then.” Roman straightens up, hitting the desk with his fist. “If the police are after us, there’s no telling that Ten will even be alive come morning.”

“Don’t,” Jude says before I can. “It’s Tennant. It’ll take a lot more than some high and mighty cops to take him out. If he heard you talking like that he’d probably kill you for losing faith in him.”

Roman huffs at the light tone to Jude’s words, but we all know it’s true. Tennant will get out of this. It just might take longer than any of us want to admit, but now isn’t the time to bring doubt into the situation, not when we all need to be level-headed.

“What has Hollis said?”

Jude shakes his head at my question, as Roman grips the edge of the desk and hangs his head again. “He’s locked himself in his office. After the news broke, he kicked me out and closed the door, claiming he and Leandro can’t have any distractions, but…”

But he’s spiraling . I don’t need Jude to finish his sentence to know the truth. Tennant may be the one most people worry about, but it’s Hollis we should all be afraid of. We’ve already seen once that he doesn’t do well without Tennant, but this is more than just a simple kidnapping.

Before, the threat was mostly an annoyance—aside from the bastards having Il Padrone and Cristian—now it feels as if they’re on our doorstep, and there’s only so much we can do when they have the law behind them. Though…rules were always meant to be broken.

If the cops want to play games, well, we’ll give them what they want.

“Keep trying to get through to him,” Roman tells Jude. “I…I can’t worry about him right now.”

Jude reaches for Roman once more and the boy melts into his embrace, going from clutching at the desk to clutching his lover.

“There’s nothing else we can do tonight,” I say carefully. “Our people are getting secure. The contingency plans we had in place are there for a reason and they’re working. No one else has been picked up, though updates from both our people and the Martellis’ say they’ve fallen for the blinds we’ve set up. You should rest.”

“I can’t sleep. There’s too much to do.”

“There will always be something to do, Roman,” I say gently. “You can’t do anything about Tennant, not tonight. Our men and the Martellis’ know what to do. I’ll stay up until Enzo returns with his report.

“Leandro and Hollis are working on figuring out how tonight’s ambush went under our radar. Even with the police being bought off by the asshole after us, someone should have known and informed us. I refuse to believe we’ve lost our entire foothold in the locals. A dirty cop is a dirty cop. Not everyone wants ‘justice’ and ‘eradication’, or whatever it was that asshole was spouting.”

“None of that does us any good now,” Roman spits. “Tennant and Joel are still in police custody, and I feel as if I’m losing this Family with each passing moment. How can I rescue Dad if I can’t even keep my lover out of jail?”

“This is just a blip,” Jude reassures him. “We’ll get past it, and they’ll pay for their crimes.”

Roman snorts at his wording, but I’m on Jude’s side. It’s not the end of the world, it only feels that way for right now.

“Go to bed, Roman,” I try suggesting again. “Even for just a few hours. You’ll be useless to us all if you’re running on fumes. I promise, if anything happens, I’ll get you right away. But neither Ten nor your father would want you working yourself into the ground for them; they care too much about you for that.”

Tears fill his eyes as more tension leaves him, and he leans heavily against Jude. His walls are starting to finally crack, and one day soon, everything he’s been holding back will come rushing out. Leaks have already sprouted, but I know him well enough to be sure that the insecurities he’s voiced thus far are barely scratching the surface.

“You swear on Dad’s life?”

“Yes,” I reply firmly. “Trust me, Figlio Mio. Il mondo sarà ancora in fiamme dopo un pisolino.”

He lets out a watery snort, but finally nods. “Okay, fine. You win.”

He pulls away from Jude and rounds the desk. Opening my arms, I hug him close, soaking up the boy I helped raise into the man he is today. Right now, he’s the last physical reminder I have of my husband. Because despite the reassurance I give Roman, I too am scrambling at straws, trying to hold myself together. I’ve just had years more practice at it than he has.

“Ti voglio bene, Roman,” I whisper. “Go rest, Figlio Mio. I'll hold down the fort, okay?”

He clutches at me for a moment longer before nodding. “Okay. Thank you…Dad. For everything. I love you.”

My breath catches as my own tears form. I've been a part of Roman’s life for ten years now, and he's never called me that. I know he's my son as much as Cristian's, but hearing it from him…

Pressing a kiss to his hair, I hold him a little tighter, taking a moment to reset myself.

Cristian, you need to come home. We both need you.