Wade has a death grip on Kara and isn’t sure how that happened.

Whatever horrors his nightmare trapped him in are long gone, but his face is wet where it’s pushed to the back of her neck and his hold on her crushing.

“It’s not real.”

“Wake up. I need you to wake up.”

“You have to let go, Wade, let go.”

Her words, combined with the steady flutter of her thumb over his wrist, lift the cloud of confusion. It’s easier this time to recognize her. He doesn’t startle or shy away. Doesn’t take his aggression out on the closest thing, but he’s still wrapped around her so snug it has to be painful.

He pulls away, rolling onto his back to catch his breath. “Sorry. Did I hurt you?”

“No, I’m fine.”

He has a feeling that’s a lie. His muscles are half as strong, but he’s still bigger than her, and the worry in her voice as she tried to soothe him was clear.

“I should have moved to the floor before I fell asleep. We can’t do this. This always happens.”

She turns to face him, propping up on an elbow to rest her other palm over his chest. “You didn’t hurt me, Wade.”

“Don’t mean I won’t next time.”

“You’re getting used to this. You knew it was me right away.”

He sighs, unable to deny that she’s at least partly right. The contact didn’t spark fear because some part of him knew it was her even before he woke. He felt her body against his and sought that comfort, subconsciously hoping she’d protect him, but unable to control how tightly he begged for it.

“This is a big thing,” she says softly, always ready to celebrate his smallest successes. “We slept in the same bed all night and we’re still okay. Be happy about that with me?”

It’s simple to accept the security that the sweet smile on her lips offers. “Okay.”

She grins wider, rubbing her palm over his chest in wide, lazy circles. “Good. Because I don’t want to sleep apart again.”

“I don’t want to either.”

If he’s forced to leave tonight, he’ll mourn the loss of her after having gotten a taste of what he needs most. His worry is never far behind, though, prompting the same conversation they’ve had before. “If something happens. If the next time is worse—”

“What if it’s not? This might be helping. We’ll never know unless we try, and I’m willing to take the risk. You need to trust me enough to make these choices for myself.”

“Will you keep the knife under your pillow like before?”

“I won’t.”

“That’s the only way. I gotta know you can protect yourself if I lose it. Promise me.”

There’s not a chance she’ll stab him even if he’s about to kill her, but he can fool himself into thinking she has a safety net.

“Fine. If that’s the only way you’ll agree to it. It’s settled then? You’ll sleep here with me every night?”

He nods and her relieved smile prompts one of his own as he relaxes into her touch.

She’s good at this. Flooding. Getting him used to being touched until it isn’t a stress point. Those wide circles fan out to curve over his shoulder and across his collarbone.

On the whole, he’s surprised by how simple it is to be with her. Even before the cell, he never enjoyed this kind of closeness. His heart never stayed with anyone else long enough to desire it.

After, everything that made a real relationship impossible was only amplified.

His eyes slip closed as her fingertips trace his cheek before the warmth of her lips press to his temple.

It’s a careful gesture with no intent behind it, only meant to comfort him, but his body wants her even when his mind isn’t ready.

His cock tents his boxers beneath the covers and he can only hope she doesn’t notice.

He’s confusing himself these days with the rapid fluctuation of his reactions to her.

Half the time, he wants to bury himself inside her and never leave, and the other half, he is more convinced than ever that it can never happen for more reasons than he’s willing to list.

Do friends lie like this in bed, half clothed, wrapped up together and trading gentle touches? The answer is an obvious no, unless he’s been confused about the true definition of friendship. He isn’t blind to what’s developing between them. He simply has no idea how to handle it.

Then the doorbell rings, startling them both. At least he didn’t lunge for the shotgun this time before following her to the door.

Wade can’t suppress the smug grin as he stares at Luke on the other side.

They rushed down the steps when the knocking only grew more incessant. Kara’s shirt buttons are lopsided and her hair is mussed. Wade’s half hard, which can’t be difficult to notice if Luke’s scowl is anything to go by.

It absolutely looks like they’ve been fucking in every position imaginable.

That’s right, asshole. She’s with me. She wants to be with me, he thinks, knowing it’s stupid and childish, but his private thoughts are his alone. If he wants to be smug for five seconds, who’s going to stop him?

“What are you doing here? How did you find us?” Kara’s already irritated before Luke opens his mouth.

“I got worried when we arrived at the cottage to find you gone, so I came here straight away to ask Juliet if she’d seen you.”

“We?”

“It was only a few others to ensure your safety, but that’s unnecessary now that you’re here.”

She hadn’t been wrong about him trying to force them out of the blue house. Knowing how close they came to being dragged back to Paradise Falls has Wade enraged. He’d have been shoved in a room alone, and the two of them kept apart, all in a misguided attempt at keeping Kara safe.

Wade is silent, but his anger must be obvious. She slides a hand down his arm to squeeze in reassurance.

“Is that all you came here for? To check on me?” she asks.

“No. I also brought what you asked for.” Luke produces a map with a flourish, opening it to reveal three marked X’s. “These are all sightings of Silas’s group within the last two weeks.”

She grabs the map while his blood pressure skyrockets at the idea of seeing Silas again.

A part of him has shoved revenge to the back burner while focusing on trying to get his shit together. That was always step one. Without it, there could never be a step two, but confronting this particular demon is still throwing him.

“If you need assistance, I can provide you with some on your quest,” Luke offers.

“That won’t be necessary,” Kara replies shortly. “Thank you, but we’ve got it. I would like the bike back, though. Can you ask someone to bring it?”

“I don’t think anyone back home knows how to ride it.”

“Load it into a wagon?”

Luke sighs. “Maybe you can fetch it yourself. That might give us a chance to talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” she replies.

“Things are obviously progressing here. Wade looks…better. Surely you’re free to allow him back to his own life again and you to yours.”

Oh, Wade wants to sock this guy right on the chin until the bone wobbles.

At one point, he assumed Luke was the better choice. Safer. Capable of giving her the kind of happiness that he couldn’t. Perhaps that’s still true, but everything is changing so quickly that letting her go now would be even more devastating.

“She said there’s nothing to talk about,” Wade growls, knowing he should let her fight her own battles but unable to keep his mouth shut.

“You think this is what’s best for her? Keeping her shackled to you like some sort of nurse? Always on edge? Always wondering what you might do next? If you truly care about her, you’ll set her free.”

“Stop,” Kara snaps, blinking in shock at Luke.

“Me and you? Not happening. I’m with Wade.

We are together. As together as two people can be.

We had sex three times in the last twenty-four hours, and I’m really hoping it’ll happen again later.

Just so you have no delusions about where my heart is. It’s here. With him.”

Wade can’t believe she actually said that.

It’s entirely false, but she speaks the words naturally and with enough honesty that for a moment, he second-guesses if they actually slept together or not.

His cheeks flame red even while he can’t help but stand taller.

She links their fingers together, staring boldly at Luke, whose mouth hangs open.

“Any questions?” she asks evenly, only to be met with silence. “Okay. I look forward to getting that bike back via wagon if you don’t want to see both of us come get it, and I’m certain you don’t. Thank you for the map.”

She closes the door in his face. Wade has no doubt that this is the last they’ll ever see of Luke.

“I’m so sorry about that,” she begins. “He has no right to say what he did, and I just lost it. I didn’t mean to lie, but he isn’t the type to let it go unless…I’m sorry.”

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” he whispers in awe. “You’re the only one who’s ever….”

Stood up for him like that.

Claimed him like that.

Looked as proud to be with him as she did.

“It’s me and you now,” she replies. “No one’s changing that, certainly not Luke. The only good thing he’s done is bring us that map.”

The map. He’d almost forgotten. “So what’s the plan?”

“You won’t like it.”

* * *

“Nope. No way. Nah.” He’s already pacing the length of the kitchen island before she’s finished explaining.

“It always worked before.”

“You’ve done this before?” Wade’s eyes widen with horror.

“Of course. How else do you think I got close enough to them? Hand-to-hand combat isn’t exactly my thing.”

He hasn’t given much thought to the details of what she did in her search for him. Purposely blocked it out because he can’t picture her that close to people so dangerous. Not when he’s still so afraid that what happened to him might happen to her, too, that it plagues his nightmares.

She risked everything for a slim chance at success, not only once, but over and over again until it was a honed skill.

“I know how it sounds, but laying out bait is how we catch the rats,” she continues.

“Sure, except when you’re the bait. That’s not happening.”

She wants to put herself on the side of the road smack in the middle of Silas’s new territory until one of them tries to pick her up. The very idea has him on the verge of another panic attack.

Kara is determined. Being relentless was the only way to move forward in the face of impossible odds, and she’s perfected it.

“Wade, I know what I’m doing. We capture one when they come to help me, and get him to tell us where the camp is.

You’ll be out of sight the whole time. I won’t be alone.

Then we take them out one by one from a distance until we reach the main rat.

I’ve only ever left one of them alive before.

The others don’t know what I look like, and it’s been years since anyone could give them a description. ”

“You left one alive?”

“To go back and tell Silas why I was picking off his men. So he knew I was looking for you.”

He sighs, threading a hand through his hair in frustration. “Not willing to risk you like that.”

“Do you have a better plan?”

“Not yet, but that doesn’t mean this one is solid.”

She cuts him a harsh glare paired with a harsher tone. “We can’t let this chance pass. If we wait too long, they could move on again. There’s no telling when the next sightings might be. They’re like fucking ghosts. You think they’re there and then they’re just gone.”

“I can wait.” He’s unprepared for how easy that is to say after wanting his revenge for so long.

“I can’t. He needs to pay for what he’s done. For what he’s taken from you. From us.”

“We’re here, aren’t we? Together?”

Kara tilts her head, her lips pursed and her tone uncertain. “Are you saying you don’t want this anymore? That killing Silas isn’t something you—”

“I’m not saying that. Not exactly, just not like this.”

When her words soften with realization, he thinks maybe talking her out of this might not be so difficult after all, until he hears her next words.

“If you’re not ready yet, I get it. I shouldn’t be pushing like this. It’s too soon, you’ve just begun to settle in, and I’m asking you to see the person who…I don’t know what I was thinking. I can go alone. You don’t have to come. I’ll get it done.”

“No! Goddamit, Kara. You can’t just…” He trails off, sounding no better than the pompous ass at their door did, but this is different. This is his Kara talking about risking her life in his name when he’s already standing right here in front of her.

The fire in her eyes tells him exactly how she survived what she had to do while he was gone. How she managed to take out so many men that Silas feared her. He has no doubt she can take care of herself, but she isn’t the only factor here. He ain’t leaving this up to chance.

“We don’t even know if Silas is with them,” he continues. “Could just be another outpost.”

“Then we get what information we can from them.”

“And if there are twenty of them and one of you? If it’s a trap?”

“That’s what this is? You think I can’t do it? I’m accurate up to a thousand yards, you know that. They have a sniper rifle in the armory here that I use.” She almost looks hurt, as if he’s questioning her abilities.

“I know better than anyone what you can do. Wouldn’t be standing here right now if you couldn’t.”

“Then I don’t understand what the problem is. Silas will never stop until someone stops him.”

He isn’t sure how to explain to her or even to himself.

All he’s thought about, when he wasn’t thinking of her for the last six years, is how his enemy’s head needs to be separated from his body.

Wade has imagined all the ways he would make his captor pay in explicit detail, letting it lull him to sleep some nights like a vicious bedtime story.

Now, he has so much more to lose if they fail.

“We take backup? More than just me and you?” he tries.

“Juliet won’t send anyone I’ve asked before. It’s not her fault. I know she wants to help, but she’s had her own struggles. The men at Paradise Falls are untrained, and I don’t think Luke would offer them again, anyway. Besides, since when are me and you not good enough?”

“That’s not fair.” He shakes his head. “Don’t do that.”

“Then tell me what you want because I don’t understand how we went from being on the same page to this far apart.”

I want to leave this all behind, take you out on the road and start fresh. Never think about Silas again. That’s what he wants to say, but could they ever truly relax knowing he’s out there?

“Can we talk about this later? Sleep on it? See how it looks tomorrow?”

“Yes. Of course.” She offers him a half-smile that feels fake.

He isn’t sure what the next step is, but the last thing he’ll do is agree to any plan that puts her in the path of an oncoming train.