Page 40

Everyone stared at me, utterly shocked and visibly confused, and that’s when I realised what I had just blurted out.

I turned to look at my mother, who looked at me, surprised, and immediately forced a wide, fake smile onto my face.

“What? Tonight? Hehehe… Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

I tried to play it cool, laughing lightly, and glanced at him, looking at me with a faint smile, as if he saw right through me.

“Yes, tonight.

Or did you forget that we’ll finally do something you were so desperate for?”

He said it casually, but I could feel the heat rushing to my cheeks, burning with embarrassment.

I looked at my parents, wishing the floor would swallow me up, the butterflies in my stomach long dead from shame.

“What? Hehehe…”

I let out a nervous laugh, hoping he would stop teasing me in front of everyone.

But instead, he continued, all too smoothly.

“What, what? Didn’t you say you wanted to oversee the reconstruction of the kingdom’s outskirts yourself? You requested the head of architecture, remember? He’ll be arriving in Suryagarh by evening.

Don’t you want to meet him?”

He said it so nonchalantly, eating berries like it was nothing.

“Ohhh,”

I exhaled, finally catching my breath.

Relief washed over me like a wave.

“Right...

the reconstruction… the outskirts… yes, of course,”

I tried to smile at my parents, but they looked at me like I was some fool.

“Why are you acting so silly suddenly, ?”

Daadisa voiced, and I immediately shrank into a small, sheepish smile.

“I’m sorry, Daadi-sa… I just don’t feel ready to leave yet,”

I admitted quietly.

My mother placed a gentle hand on my shoulder.

“You came to celebrate the festival with us, and we are so happy you did.

But both you and Ranaji have responsibilities waiting for you.

It’s better to fulfil those first,”

she said, and I nodded instantly.

My eyes kept stealing glances at my dangerously calm husband, who was behaving like nothing was happening.

But inside, I was freaking out, thinking of how our first time would be.

This time, it felt different.

Real.

It was actually going to happen, and that thought alone sent shivers down my spine.

I felt like prey sitting beside a predator.

After experiencing just a fraction of what he was capable of, I knew I wouldn’t stand a chance.

The first time I asked him to make love to me, I hadn’t known that side of him.

The side I hardly knew existed—the things he was into, the things he had thought for me, for us, things I had never even imagined—not in my wildest dreams.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, and reached for a fruit with shaky fingers.

But when I looked up, my heart skipped several beats, finding him staring right at me.

A teasing smirk curved his lips as he sucked on a berry.

A drop of its juice slid down his finger, and with deliberate ease, he licked it off—eyes still locked on mine.

I swallowed hard, the knot in my stomach twisting tighter.

I quickly glanced around the table.

Everyone was busy with their breakfast, utterly oblivious to the silent game he was playing.

I dropped my gaze and spotted a banana in front of me.

Determined, I grabbed it and peeled it a little too quickly, and then, without thinking, snapped it in half with both hands.

“Kya kar rahi ho, ?”

(What are you doing, ?)

A chill shot through me as Daadisa’s voice sliced through the moment.

I immediately placed the banana on my plate and turned to her, wide-eyed.

“Nothing… nothing, Daadisa,”

I mumbled, trying to sound casual.

She narrowed her eyes.

“Ye kya dhang hai bhojan karne ka?”

(Is that how you eat?)

I just wanted to vanish.

“Ahh… uhmm… sorry, Daadisa.

I… I haven’t eaten a banana in a long time,”

I muttered, feeling utterly foolish.

My eyes flicked toward my father, who was smiling slightly.

I timidly lowered my gaze, trying to gather myself, when Agastya suddenly spoke up.

“Bhaisa, bhojan to karne dijiye unhein,”

(Bhaisa, at least let her eat.)

Everyone turned to look at him, especially Rudra.

Rudra shot him a sharp, silent glare and replied in a slow, warning tone, “Who am I stopping from eating, Agastya?”

Agastya gave an awkward smile and quickly looked away—his gaze landing on Ranvijay, who had just finished bringing in the treaty documents and was calmly enjoying his meal.

“Ranvijay, Bhaisa,”

he blurted, and Ranvijay looked up with furrowed brows, confused by the sudden address.

Just then, my father spoke up, “Alright, I have something urgent to attend to.

I request your leave,”

he said, standing up from his place.

I kept my gaze lowered, grateful for the brief distraction.

My mother followed right after.

“I need to look into your departure preparations, ,”

she said softly, and I gave her a small, weak smile as she left.

The moment she was gone, I looked back at him, enjoying his grapes again, as if nothing around him had changed.

He lifted his eyes and met mine, and my gaze dropped to his lips, slick with berry juice.

Just watching him suck on them stirred thoughts I wasn’t ready for.

The image of him sucking me down there flashed in my mind and I instantly lowered my eyes, cheeks burning.

What the hell is happening to me? I shut my eyes, trying to calm my racing mind.

There was another reason why I was so nervous was the fact that I knew our first time together wasn’t going to be… easy.

I was only twenty-two.

He was twenty-nine.

We were different in more ways than just age.

When we stood together, my head barely reached his chest. His hand could easily span across most of my waist. And then there was the thought that left me truly breathless—how big was he?

He had been in self-control for nearly a decade.

That meant he never even masturbated, which meant it would be intense.

Possibly rough.

Maybe painful.

Definitely unforgettable. And maybe… too pleasurable.

I shivered just thinking about it and quickly shook my head to clear my thoughts.

I found myself chewing the inside of my lip out of nervous habit when my grandmother’s voice suddenly cut through.

“Why aren’t you eating, ?”

I immediately lifted my gaze toward her and smiled, trying to appear composed.

My throat was dry, but I managed to swallow and quickly began eating.

“I’m eating, Daadisa,”

I said, forcing cheer into my voice as I tried to focus on my plate, while my eyes kept flicking toward him.

He was still playing his teasing game with those grapes, eyes locked on me more often.

“I’m also done,”

Daadisa suddenly declared, making me jolt slightly at the sound of her voice.

She rose from her seat, and a second later, Agastya stood up too.

“I’m done as well, Daadisa.

Allow me to help you out,”

he said with a warm smile, earning a fond nod from her.

I had no idea what was happening.

Why was everyone suddenly excusing themselves?

“Bhaisa, I need to discuss the treaty clauses with the official from Mahabaleshagarh.

I’ll take your leave too,”

Ranvijay added, standing up.

And just like that, within moments, the dining room emptied, leaving only the two of us behind.

My eyes darted to Rudra, who was still seated and smiling faintly, and the moment the last footsteps faded, he slowly stood, his palm cupping a handful of berries, which he plucked and popped into his mouth one by one as he walked toward me.

He stopped beside me, and I couldn't look away from his lips, wet with berry juice.

“Rudra…”

I breathed, my voice barely audible.

He leaned down, one hand resting on the table beside my plate, hovering dangerously close.

The proximity made my breath hitch, especially with the attendants still in the corners of the room, watching us.

My gaze dropped, shy and nervous, but he tilted my chin up gently with his fingers, making me look at him again.

My neck tilted back slightly to meet his eyes.

My lashes fluttered, heart pounding erratically, and when he leaned in closer, my lips parted slightly in anticipation.

My breath hitched the moment he pressed his lips against mine.

He sucked gently on my lower lip, and my fingers instinctively clenched into the fabric of my skirt.

My cheeks flushed with warmth, heat rising to my face as he pulled back slightly.

I blinked, dazed, as he asked in a low murmur, “Want to stay, little wife?”

His fingers brushed across my cheek in a feather-light caress, igniting goosebumps across my skin.

I swallowed hard and slowly shook my head in a ‘No’.

A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

“Good girl,”

he whispered.

Then, in a deeper voice, he spoke just one word.

“Privacy.”

At once, I shivered and glanced around, only to see the last of the attendants quietly leaving the hall.

I lowered my gaze as he moved closer and gently pulled my chair, turning me to face him.

“Rudra...”

I whispered, but the rest of the words slipped away the moment he knelt before me.

He popped the two remaining berries into his mouth, emptying his palm, and I could do nothing but sit frozen, my heart thundering in my chest.

Then, he reached for me and settled his hands on my waist, lowering himself until he gently tugged me toward the edge of the chair.

My back leaned instinctively against the small couch behind me for support.

I gasped softly when his fingers brushed over my ankle, trailing upward beneath the layers of my orange skirt.

“Rudra… no, this is the dining hall,”

I murmured, panic and anticipation colliding inside me.

My eyes darted around, but the room was empty, and I felt his lips pressing kisses on the inside of my thigh, soft like whispers.

My lashes fluttered shut as my breath quickened.

He parted my legs with ease, his hands firm yet reverent on my thighs.

My hand gripped the table’s edge, desperate for grounding.

“Ah...”

A helpless, breathy moan escaped as he suckled gently on my skin, sending a wave of sensation through my core.

“You smell so good,”

he murmured against my skin, his warm breath fanning my inner thighs.

His nose grazed along my skin, inching closer toward my core.

My back arched instinctively in response.

“Ahhh...”

A soft moan escaped my lips when he began to suck gently on the tender flesh, and my hand flew to his shoulder for support.

He deepened the motion, sucking harder on my inner thigh, and my body twitched with the sensation.

The sound of my bangles clinking echoed faintly in the dining hall, and then suddenly, he stopped.

His lips left my skin, and the loss of touch made discomfort twist inside me.

I blinked open my eyes to find him looking up at me, a smug smile playing on his lips.

He sucked lightly on his lower lip, mischief written all over his face.

“Oops.

Someone said ‘No,’”

he teased, raising an eyebrow.

My eyes widened, and fury rushed through my veins.

Without thinking, I pressed both my feet against his chest and shoved him.

He lost balance and fell onto his back with a light thud.

“I hate you,”

I muttered through gritted teeth.

He burst out laughing, and I stood to my feet, flustered, adjusting my clothes.

“Yes, I said ‘No’—and now it’s an even bigger ‘No’!”

I snapped, fuming.

He laughed even louder, clearly enjoying every second of my irritation.

“Don’t make me make you beg for it, little wife,”

he said with a wicked smirk.

“For every ‘No’ you say, the punishment will only get worse.”

My jaw clenched.

I stared at him, eyes narrowed, and hissed, “No...

No...

Nooo...

Noooo... No, no, nooooo!”

That wiped the grin off his face.

He paused...

only to lean on one elbow and mimic me in a dramatic, mocking voice.

“Ahhhhhhh, Rudra! Ahhhhhhh! Pleaseeeee, I’m begging you, pleaseeee, Rudra!”

My mouth dropped open in horror.

“What?! What did you just do?”

I half-whispered, half-shouted.

He grinned like the devil himself, clearly pleased.

“I don’t know, but I can sense the future now,”

“You’ll pay for this,”

I warned, voice trembling with a mix of anger and embarrassment.

I turned sharply on my heel and stormed out of the dining hall, fuming.

My breath came in short bursts as I headed toward the corridor that led to my chamber.

But before I could take another step, a strong hand caught my wrist.

“Rudra—!” I gasped.

He pulled me into my chamber in one swift motion, and the heavy thud of the door shutting behind us echoed through the hallway.

My eyes widened as I looked at him, only to realise he had me pinned against the door.

Before I could make sense of it, he stepped closer, his gaze burning into mine.

“What—?”

I barely managed to ask, but the words died on my lips when I saw him suddenly drop to his knees.

“Rudra,”

I gasped, my voice catching in my throat as he urgently lifted my skirt.

A flicker of protest sparked in my mind, the memory of him mocking me earlier still fresh, but it vanished the moment his mouth found my core.

My back hit the door, and fingers instinctively fisted in his hair, and my other hand clutched the fabric over his shoulder, trying to anchor myself as wave after wave of sensation surged through me.

He sucked with raw hunger, with a desperation that ignited something just as wild within me, making me roll my eyes.

“Ahhhhhh,”

I moaned, my voice trembling.

He then, without warning, lifted one of my legs and hooked it over his arm, opening me further.

As he edged even closer, I stretched instinctively, the position forcing me onto the tips of my left toes.

My entire body felt weightless, trembling with overwhelming intensity.

“Ahhhhhh, Rudra,”

I cried out, shivers running through me like currents.

My hand scrambled for the door’s lock, anything to hold on to, to keep myself straight, though it felt impossible.

My dupatta slipped off my head and shoulders.

My bun loosened, strands of hair clinging to the sheen of sweat forming on my forehead.

“Ahhhhhhhh,”

The moans kept slipping out, helpless and breathless, as he kept sucking me—rough and passionate.

My knees weakened beneath the force of pleasure, my muscles quivering uncontrollably.

“Rudraaaa...”

I whispered his name, barely able to hold myself up.

And suddenly, I felt his palm press firmly against my chest, holding me in place against the door.

My hand instinctively gripped over his, my breath catching when he grabbed my blouse, fisting the fabric tightly, clutching both the upper hem and the one wrapped around my midriff in one urgent hold.

“Ahhhhnnnnnnhhhhhhh,”

a louder moan escaped my lips as my entire body shuddered.

I felt the slickness of arousal spreading between my thighs, dampening my skin with heat and wetness.

“Ahhhh…”

My eyes fluttered shut, my head angled back.

I panted hard, trying to calm my breathing, but it was impossible.

When he finally pulled back, I saw his lips glistening, and my knees nearly gave out beneath me.

I slowly lowered my foot back to the floor, but it barely supported me.

My heart was pounding against my ribs, my legs trembling uncontrollably.

His hand slid from my blouse to the sides of my waist, pulling me even closer.

I stared at him, dazed, breathless, and utterly overwhelmed by the chaos he’d stirred within me.

He leaned in again, his tongue dragging a slow, tantalising line from my navel up to my midriff.

A violent shiver raced down my spine.

“I was wondering…”

he murmured, voice low and husky, “how would it feel to kiss and suck every inch of your body until your ‘No’ turns into a ‘Yes’?”

Just the thought alone sent goosebumps trailing across every inch of my skin.

“What?”

I barely managed to ask, and he just smiled, watching me come undone.

My entire body was trembling, my breaths coming in quick, my heart felt like it would leap out of my chest, as if I had run miles.

I didn’t know how, but I was getting dangerously drawn to him.

So much that everything else around me had started to blur, fading into irrelevance.

It was reckless, yet thrilling.

“I love you, little bird.

And I’m dying to make love to you,”

he whispered, and another strong shiver ran down my spine.

I drew in a sharp breath.

Stepping back a little, I clutched my dupatta and tried to fix my tangled hair.

“You’re making me insane, Rudra,”

I said softly.

He rose from the floor and walked toward me, gently wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into a warm, enveloping hug.

“You’ve taken seduction classes, and you’re telling me I’m the one making you insane?”

he teased.

I let out a small chuckle, a weak smile tugging at the corners of my lips.

I knew he was trying his best to tempt me, to seduce me, but I had to stay put.

At least until he met his Guruji.

A change in place often changes perspective, too.

Once we reached there, as he stood before his Guru again, I hoped it’d remind him of his responsibilities—of the sacrifices he’d chosen to make.

A moment of pleasure could easily become a lifetime of regret.

And, being human, we have the ability to think for ourselves.

It would’ve been ignorant of me had I just gone with the flow.

There was a time when I didn't know much about him, about his past, but after knowing most of it, I couldn't just let everything go in vain.

Suddenly, a sharp knock at the door pulled us both out of the haze.

I took a step back, distancing myself as my heart thudded in my chest.

“Yes?”

I called out.

From the other side, a voice answered, “Princess, the king is asking for the Ranaji.”

I turned to look at Rudra and raised a brow.

“Jaaiye, patidev.

Aapka bulaawa aa gaya hai,”

(Go, dear husband.

Your royal call has arrived.) I added with a teasing smile.

But before I could step any farther, he grabbed me close until our chests pressed together, my breath quickening in response to the intimacy.

“Aap jitna bhi prayas kar lein, , humne jo thaan liya hai wo to hum karke hi rahenge,”

(No matter how hard you try, , what I’ve resolved to do, I will do it.) He said, and I inhaled deeply, realising what he actually meant.

I lowered my gaze and closed my eyes briefly, before saying, “Jab karna tha tab to aap kuch kar nahi paaye, ab kya hi kar lenge aap?”

(When you had the chance, you couldn’t do anything—what could you possibly do now?)

I spoke in a really slow voice, not for him, but to let out a little of my own frustration.

“What? What did you say?”

he asked, and I looked up at him with a faint smile on my lips.

“Nothing.

You must go now.

Baapusa probably has something urgent to discuss,”

I replied with a warm smile.

He gave a slight nod and walked away.

I inhaled a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Once the door closed behind him, I sat down on the bed and gradually lay back.

What are you doing to me, Rudra?

Ever since I first laid eyes on him, I had waited for this moment for us to finally become one.

I had cried for him, longed for him.

And now, when that moment was inching closer, a fluttering nervousness had taken root in my stomach.

Excitement and fear twisted together inside me.

Wild thoughts and nervous shivers ran through me.

How could a man live like that? Not even touching himself for ten years...

not eating his favourite food… sleeping on a cold mattress… cutting himself off from the world? And after learning all that, I couldn’t help but feel small in front of his love.

A girl who always got everything without even asking ended up with a man like him.

A true man.

Someone so pure, so composed… yet dangerous and angry at the same time.

So determined… yet innocent enough to have trusted the wrong people.

The more I loved him, the sadder I felt for him.

Even now, after knowing everything… after realising so much, he was still trying to pretend that everything was normal.

But I knew better.

I could feel the storm he was carrying inside him.

But I couldn’t even begin to understand what was going on in his heart or mind.

Was he really drawn to me out of love…? Or was this just his way of seeking redemption for everything he did to me, to everyone?

I didn’t know.

But one thing I did know, and I could feel it deep in my bones—No matter how much he tries to convince me, I cannot let him make love to me until he’s truly out of this.

Until he’s found peace within himself.

“,”

suddenly my grandmother's voice called out, startling me.

I immediately sat up on the bed.

“Daadisa…”

I smiled, and she took her slow, weak steps towards me.

I stood up and helped her to sit beside me.

“Aapne kyun kasht kiya, Daadisa.

Humein bulwaa liya hota,”

(You shouldn’t have troubled yourself, Daadisa.

You could’ve called me.) I said gently, noticing how she paused to steady her breath.

“It’s quite alright, ,”

she replied in a measured tone, her voice laced with worry as she took my hand into hers.

“I came to speak with you...

about something important,”

I turned to face her fully, the seriousness of her tone settling into my chest like a quiet weight.

“Pata nahi kyun, , jab se tum aayi ho, aisa lag raha hai ki koi gadbad hai.

Sab theek to hai na?”

(I don't know why, , but ever since you arrived, I have felt that something is not right.

Is everything alright?)

She asked with a serious tone, and I furrowed my brows.

In just a few moments, my mind wandered back through everything that had unfolded since I arrived here, and I realised she must be truly worried for me.

I took a deep breath and looked at her with gentle reassurance.

“Daadisa, aisa kuch nahi hai, sab theek hai sach mein,”

(Daadisa, there’s nothing of the sort.

Everything is perfectly fine, really.) I said softly, trying to ease her concern, but she simply stared at me.

“No, ,”

she said, shaking her head slightly.

“Kuch toh hai jo tumhe vyaakul kar raha hai...

na tum kuch dhang se khaati ho, na adhik bolti ho,”

(There’s something troubling you, I can see it.

You’re barely eating, and you won’t speak your heart.) There was so much worry in her voice that I couldn’t help but smile a little, faintly, shyly, biting my lower lip.

“Daadisa,”

I began with a small chuckle, “it’s not what you’re thinking.

It’s Rudra.

He keeps teasing me all the time.

You all see him as this sweet, quiet, innocent man...

but only I know what he’s really like,”

Her eyes widened in surprise.

“Really? He teases you?”

I nodded quickly, grinning.

“Yes, of course! He’s always teasing me.

That’s all.

You don’t need to worry.

He truly loves me, Daadisa. He looks after everything: my health, my comfort, my smallest needs. He’s... perfect for me,”

Her face relaxed into a smile as she watched me.

“Truly? You’re not hiding anything from me?”

“Absolutely not,”

I said warmly.

“Why would I ever hide anything from you?”

She gave my hand a soft rub.

“Then it’s alright.

I just thought, if something was bothering you, I should talk to you.”

Without thinking, I leaned in and hugged her.

A sudden warmth welled up inside me, and with tears in my eyes.

“I got so lost in loving him, Daadisa,”

I whispered, my voice trembling, “I didn’t think about any of you.”

She slowly patted my back, holding me close.

“Don’t say that, ,”

she said gently.

“Love is a blessing.

Not everyone is fortunate enough to find someone who chooses them above all else.”

I chuckled softly and looked at her with moist eyes.

“God bless you, my child,”

she murmured, placing her hand lovingly on my head.

I wiped my cheeks, smiling faintly as I nodded, and hugged her again.

“Chalo, ab hum chalte hain.

Tumhe bhi sajj hona hai—samay se nikalne ke liye,”

(Alright then, I’ll take my leave.

You should get ready too, to depart on time.)

I stood up and helped her to her feet, walking her to the door.

After she left, I adjusted my clothes and fixed my hair.

It took longer than usual to get ready, and just as I was finishing up, he walked in, fresh from the meeting.

“Ready already?”

he asked, stepping inside.

Just the sight of him sent a shiver running through me.

“Ji,”

I managed to say, my voice soft, and watched as he walked closer to me.

He hugged me from behind, and my head tilted to the side as his lips pressed against the delicate skin of my neck.

His warm breath danced across my skin, sending shivers down my spine.

Through the mirror, I saw his eyes flicker with desire just as his hand found its way to my waist, fingers brushing lightly over the skin beneath my blouse, touching the chain that circled my hips.

Trying to steady my voice, I asked, “Did all go well in the meeting?”

He planted a slow, sensual kiss on my neck that made my skin erupt in goosebumps.

A soft hum escaped his throat in response.

“Hnn-hnn,”

I felt his breath grow warmer, more uneven.

Sensing the shift in his energy, I turned around quickly, hoping to break the moment before it spiralled further.

“Are you ready to leave?”

I asked, my voice a little breathless.

He looked at me, surprised by the interruption, but nodded.

“We are getting late,”

I reminded gently.

As he stepped closer, my back hit the edge of the dressing table, and I blinked, my heartbeat rising with his nearness.

“It's already so late…”

I repeated softly, but he didn’t stop.

His hand slid lower over the fabric of my skirt, tracing along my thigh, his body leaning in, his presence wrapping around me like a storm.

“Rudra…”

I breathed, meeting his gaze.

“I want to taste you again,”

he whispered.

A wave of nervous heat flushed over me.

My lips parted in silent surprise as I stared at him, trying to understand the desperation in his voice.

“Please…”

he added, stepping even closer.

I closed my eyes briefly, trying to steady the whirlpool inside me.

“Rudra, I’m feeling weak...

after so many... orgasms,”

I said, barely above a whisper.

He exhaled, resting his forehead gently against mine.

“How long will you need to rest, little rabbit?”

My lashes fluttered shut at his soft, tempting voice.

His scent enveloped me, tugging at something deep within.

I struggled to resist, to get myself together.

Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes to push him away.

“My menstruation is close,”

I whispered.

He looked at me with a flicker of surprise, yet something in his eyes hinted at doubt.

“Oh,”

he murmured, but his reaction felt measured, almost too composed.

I placed my palm gently on his chest and said with certainty, “Yes.

I can feel it… my menstruation is close,”

His gaze softened almost instantly, and to my surprise, he cupped my cheek with tender care.

“If it’s difficult for you to travel,”

he said in a low, affectionate voice, “you can stay here.

I’ll come to see you every night.

I promise,”

His words caught me off guard.

My heart fluttered. “What?”

I asked, hardly believing what I’d just heard.

He leaned forward and kissed my forehead.