Page 21 of Replay (Toronto Blaze #3)

Did She Ask to See Your Lightsaber?

Josh

That kiss from Katie stuck with me all night, and I went into practice with a big smile on my face.

Didn’t last. Coach was pissed about the game, and he worked us hard.

The trainers had told me that I should stop if I felt anything with my knee, but I didn’t take the out.

Hockey was a team sport, so I did the suicides with the others.

I just hoped I could make a difference when we got on the ice for a game.

Before dismissing us, Coach had us gather around. More than a few of us were leaning on our sticks for support.

“I don’t know what happened last night. I hope it was just a reaction after last season.

But you’re fucking better than that, and I want to see that next game.

Instead of freaking out over losing the goddamn Cup, you can think about sweating your balls off in practice if you screw the pooch like that again. ”

I wasn’t sure if that was really motivating us the way he hoped, but he dismissed us so we hurried off the ice quickly before he changed his mind.

“Knee good, Ducky?” Cooper asked.

“No worse than the rest of me.” I pulled off my practice jersey and tossed it toward the laundry carts.

JJ stopped by on his way to the showers. “My sister liked your girl. Said she was nice.”

The grin that the kiss had started came back. “Thanks. I appreciate your sister talking to her.”

“So, is she your girl now?”

With my skates off, I started working on my pads. “Hope so. She kissed me last night.”

The guys who were around me oohed and whistled. I threw my socks at them, but I didn’t really mind.

“Just a kiss?” asked Oppy.

“It was a great kiss.”

Guys started chirping. JJ leaned down. “Better to take it slow and get it right than rush and mess it up.”

I nodded and he left. Conversation moved on to muscles sore from practice, plans for the night, and I started to worry. JJ might have thought I was taking it slow, but really I was letting Katie drive. And I had no idea what speed she wanted. That kiss hadn’t been just a test drive, had it?

When I came back from the shower, I finally found a message from Katie.

Glad to be back on the ice?

I stared at those seven words. What exactly was Katie thinking? Did the kiss tie into that somehow? I’d had a few incidents of misinterpreting texts, so I had to be sure to get this right.

Cooper paused on the way to his stall, towel around his hips. “You okay there, Ducky?”

I sighed and shoved the phone in his face. “What does that mean?”

Cooper took the phone from me and held it back a few inches. “This is from Katie?”

“Yeah.”

“She knows you’re playing again?”

“Yeah.”

“Then I think she’s asking how your first practice back went.” He passed the phone back to me.

“I was hoping there was subtext there. Like, maybe she wanted to see me in person to know how I was doing.”

Cooper shrugged. “I don’t know her well enough to guess on that. Tell her how practice went. We’re leaving tomorrow for a couple of games in New York. Keep things light and friendly till we get back. See how it goes.”

I could do that. I started to text.

Felt good to be back. Leaving tomorrow for a couple of away games.

* * *

Katie didn’t reply that day. I was nervous about that as we headed to Pearson Airport to fly out. Fitch drove, and my leg kept bouncing as I watched the city as we headed west. It must have bothered him.

“Do you have to bounce around like that?”

“What?”

“Your leg. It’s almost moving the car.”

“Sorry, man. I’m a little on edge.”

“Why?”

“I convinced Katie we should be friends. I was ready to take it slow. But that kiss was different. Maybe she hated it and now she doesn’t even want to be friends.”

“Didn’t you talk about it?”

“I was afraid to. In case she said it was a mistake.”

“Not great on communication, you two.”

He had a point. That had done us in last time. “I told her she could kiss me anytime she wanted, so this is definitely up to her now.”

“Maybe she needs time to figure out what she wants.”

I chewed on my thumbnail. “What if she doesn’t want to see me again?”

Fitch shot me a glance. “Not possible. You’ve got your own special charm.”

That sounded like I was a weirdo. “What does that mean?”

“It means she was crazy about you before. She’s afraid of being hurt again. Before she goes all in, she needs to make sure you’re not going to do something stupid this time.”

“I would never.”

He frowned at me before focusing back on the road. “If I’d asked you back in high school if you’d hurt her, what would you say?”

I sagged in the seat. “Fuck. You’re right. But I’ve learned and I’d never do it again.”

“It’s going to take time to show her. You can’t expect to just tell her, and she’ll believe it.”

“I guess. But I don’t want to lose her. Not again.”

We pulled off the 427 to get into the airport. The team had a private jet when we traveled so we didn’t have to go through the main terminals. It was nice, because I’d traveled the regular way and the waiting, the lines—it was all exhausting.

New York was a short trip, so we got there in good time to do a light practice and hit up the hotel for our game day rituals.

I still hadn’t heard from Katie, so I didn’t get my usual pregame nap the way I liked.

I spent too much time trying to figure out what she was thinking, but I wouldn’t know till I heard from her.

Maybe I should just ask her what was going on.

I’d give her another day. So I wasn’t pressing her, but I wasn’t going to ignore her either. Two days should be enough.

Soon, it was back to the arena for warm-ups, and then, the game.

The game was a shit show. Again. We were bad.

Just like the last game when I’d watched with Katie.

I scored a goal and assisted on one with Cooper, but that was all we got.

Meanwhile, New York scored seven times. We couldn’t make a pass to save our lives, and we spent what felt like half the game a man down while someone was in the sin bin for stupid penalties.

Petey was peppered, and he couldn’t stop them all.

We trudged back to the locker room, everyone feeling like shit, with a lecture from Coach to come. I pulled off my jersey and pads, figuring I might as well be comfortable for the rundown coming. I checked my phone and there it was. A message from Katie.

Good luck with the game tonight.

That ship had sailed, and sunk in the New York harbor by now, but reading that message put a smile on my face.

“Are we interrupting, Middleton?”

Shit, that was Coach. I dropped the phone. “Sorry, Coach.”

“What the fuck are you smiling about after that game?”

Oops. Still glad to hear from Katie, but this was not the time for it. “Um, just a friend.”

“Did your friend watch the game?”

I shrugged. “Dunno, but the text was from before it.”

Coach crossed his arms. “Because since the puck dropped, there’s been nothing to smile about from where I was watching.”

And he was off.

There was something wrong with us and it was Coach’s job to figure it out and find a solution, but hell if I knew what it was.

We did good in practice, but when the game started, when it counted, we fell apart.

It obviously related back to last season, when we’d totally fucked up the overtime in that last important game. But how to fix it? No idea.

Normally practice the morning after a game with a back-to-back happening was optional. Tomorrow it was not. Coach couldn’t work us too hard with another game to play, but he was pissed, so we were skating in the morning.

* * *

Once Coach had finished ripping us a new one, Cooper made everyone go out for something to eat. Most of us wanted to crawl back to the hotel and forget the game as soon as possible, but when our captain said we had to meet up, we did.

He’d found an Italian place not too far away and ordered massive quantities of food and beer for us.

Once we’d all gathered around some pushed-together tables, he stood.

“When these pitchers are empty, it’s water for everyone.

Don’t overeat or coach will kill us at practice in the morning.

And that is the last we’re mentioning hockey tonight. Anyone who does is paying the tab.”

So, we were team building.

It wasn’t easy to get the conversation going, not when we couldn’t talk about our jobs, which were hockey, or our favorite sport, which was hockey, or what we were doing tomorrow, because, again, hockey.

“Ducky—what were you smiling about to get Coach pissed off?”

I swallowed the mouthful of pasta I’d been chewing. “I wasn’t the reason Coach was pissed.” That rant had definitely been earned by the whole team.

“Warning, Ducky.”

I nodded at Cooper. That was getting close to having to pony up for the food. “Katie sent me a message.” I looked over at our captain. “But I can’t say what it was about.”

Crash elbowed me in the ribs. “Dirty stuff? Or just the thing that cannot be named?”

“Not dirty stuff.” Though that would have been nice. At least the text meant she wasn’t ghosting me.

“But it was still good?”

My mouth twisted as I considered. Not being ghosted was good. But that text was baseline good. Something more friend-y, like asking about getting together when I was back, would have been better. Talking about kissing again would have been excellent.

I shrugged. “Better than nothing.”

Then I felt bad. Anything Katie was good. I was lucky she was giving me a chance to be friends again.

“What’s better than nothing?” someone asked from down the table.

“Ducky’s girl. But we can’t say what it is because we can’t talk about it.”

“Ducky’s girl is better than nothing? You can do better, Duckman.”

I couldn’t let that go. “Katie is way better than nothing. That’s not what we were talking about! She sent me a message, and we were just figuring out what it meant.”

“Did she ask to see your lightsaber?” Oppy asked.

I glared at him. That had been embarrassing. Both times. And was why I didn’t trust my interpretation of texts.

“No!”

“Remember that time the woman got his number and asked that?”

“No. What happened?”

I dropped my head into my hands.

“Ducky was thrilled and asked her over. He invited her to his bedroom, where he has all his Star Wars stuff. She headed straight for his pants.”

Yeah, she’d been using lightsaber to mean something else. But how was I supposed to know?

“So you hooked up instead?”

I lifted my head. “No! Not when she pulled out a red condom.”

The table exploded in laughter. And yeah, that was funny, until a few weeks later someone I met asked to see my lightsaber again. I thought I knew what she meant, but when I started to drop my pants, she covered her eyes. She’d wanted to see my actual Star Wars memorabilia, not my dick.

“So what did your girl really say?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Was it dirty?”

Crash answered for me. “No, it was about what we can’t talk about. Right, Ducky?”

I nodded, but the conversation had taken off on its own. “What are we not allowed to talk about? Threesomes when it’s two guys?”

“Are we not allowed to talk about that?”

“Some people still freak out about the gay thing.”

“Ducky and his girl had a threesome with a guy?”

I said no , but no one was listening to me.

They went off the rails talking about threesomes and how to describe if the two same-gendered people got with each other or not, and I actually learned some things.

That led to the guys talking about vacations and where the best places to go were in the offseason, and suddenly the meal was over.

We’d managed to get through it without anyone getting more than a warning about mentioning the banned topic. Cooper had let everyone off, so he put down his card to pay for the meal.

“Good job, Ducky,” he said when I paused to thank him for the food.

“Me? I thought we couldn’t talk about…you know.”

He shook his head. “Once you got everyone talking about sex, we managed the meal without anyone obsessing over the game.”

I snorted. “I guess you can say it since you’re paying.”

He took back the card from the waitstaff, signing on to what I was pretty sure was a very generous tip.

“I can say it because I’m making up the rules.” He slipped the receipt into his wallet and grinned. “Now, let’s get back for curfew and a good night’s sleep.”