Page 5 of Reluctant to Love
“I’ve wanted a second chance for so long and I feel like the universe is telling me it’s time to ask for one.”
“Fuck the universe,” she says tersely before slamming the door shut.
I laugh out loud. “I’m not going to give up, sweets,” I call out, hoping she’ll reappear.
“I shouldn’t have lied to you,” I say. This isn’t the ideal situation but I’m pretty sure Eleanor is a captive audience on the other side of the door. “I should have been honest with you the moment I hired you to be my ghostwriter. You were Famke’s intern which you should have known before you agreed to work with me. That was my first mistake.”
My ego prevented me from telling Eleanor the truth when she responded to my post about a ghostwriter. I was married to the powerful senior editor of Dreammedia Press, and yet I struggled to get my foot in the door anywhere. It was embarrassing. No matter who I hired to help me write my debut novel, I couldn’t tell them who my wife was or where she worked.
“I should have told you about Famke after our first kiss,” I continue. Falling in love with Eleanor was unexpected and at the time, unknown territory I didn’t understand how to navigate. “That was my second mistake.”
I take a tentative step toward her door and place my palm flat against it. “I made so many mistakes with you, Ellie. But falling in love with you wasn’t one of them.”
From the other side, I hear a soft sound, like sniffling. Is she crying? I try the handle, shaking it but it’s locked.
“You have to let me tell you this face-to-face,” I beg. “You have to let me look you in the eye and tell you I was wrong.”
The door opens slowly, and Eleanor is standing there with red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. I rush forward but she holds up a hand, stopping me in my tracks, reminding me I no longer have the right to take her into my arms and kiss her tears away.
“I’m really tired Roderick,” she says softly. “I’d really just like to go to bed.”
“I’ll leave you alone, but I want you to look me in the eye first.” Slowly, she lifts her head. “I’m not going to give up, Ellie. We’ve been given a second chance and I’m not going to waste it.”
Without hesitation, I lean forward and brush my lips against her cheek. My hand skims her waist, memorizing the new softness to her slight curves. “Sleep tight, sweets.”
Then I leave her alone, hopeful she’ll listen to the universe and give me, and us, a second chance.