Page 10

Nox

I don’t bother to change after Bastian leaves my cabin. No matter what I told him, I won’t be sleeping tonight. I hurt too much for the sweet embrace of oblivion. Which just goes to show I’m a fool.

Instead, I wait long enough to ensure our new guest will be safely tucked into his room, and then I slip out the door and onto the deck. We’re still racing away from the inevitable pursuit, and the few air-users on the deck are entirely focused on their task and, aside from short nods, pay little attention to me.

I’m not in the mood for company, so I make my way to the stern. There’s a little space between the railing and some supplies we have strapped down, and I tuck myself into it, letting the wind and waves of our passing soothe me as little else can.

The sea may be a cruel mistress, may be as changeable as any force I’ve encountered, but she’s not selfish and petty and shortsighted in the way we humans are. Her cruelty is pure in the way only an element can be. Fire, air, earth, water: they have unique personalities, but they’re all beautifully uncaring and beyond our human concerns.

It’s good to be reminded how small we are in the grand scheme of things. Humans, monsters, others, we could be wiped off the face of Threshold tomorrow and it wouldn’t matter. The sun would still rise and set, the tides would still be called by the moon, the storms would still sweep across the sea, the fire would still burn as easily as it warms.

I close my eyes and breathe the salty air deep.

Things were always going to change, this conflict was always coming, but I was fool enough to think I’d have more time. I’ve only been captain for a few months, after having spent more than a decade under Hedd’s tender mercies. It was difficult doing my part for the resistance while trying to corral that asshole, and I had been looking forward to more time to actually make a difference.

Which just goes to show—I should be careful what I wish for.

A slight creak of timbers has me opening my eyes as Bowen sinks carefully next to me. There’s not much space, so his broad shoulder brushes mine. I sigh. “Did you draw the short straw to come talk to me?”

“Eyal is busy keeping us on course, Poet is dealing with the new addition to the crew, and Evelyn decided I would be a better choice than Lizzie.”

I make a show of shuddering. “Threatening me with the vampire. That’s just rude.” I like Lizzie quite a bit, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m feeling too raw to deal with her brutal honesty. “What about Maeve?”

“You don’t get Maeve without the vampire attached to her hip.” He braces his wide forearms on the railing. “What’s going on, Nox?”

I almost tell him to mind his own damn business, but the crew will have to find out the change of plans soon enough. No matter what Siobhan and Bastian—and I, I guess—decide, we can’t force the crew to do anything they don’t want to do. I have no interest in forcing them. Which means a vote.

“Up until this point, the rebellion has functioned in secrecy. Siobhan is the head, and she coordinated all the moving pieces to do the most good with the least amount of danger. Bastian being taken captive…and then our rescuing him? It changes things.”

I expect impatience, but all he gives me is a steady look. “I know.”

“We can’t run. They’ll hunt us through any realm we attempt to take refuge in, and running would put others in danger. The movement is too big; it won’t stop just because we disappear. It will get more disorganized, which will mean more people will be caught, tortured, and killed. The fight has to come out into the open, but Siobhan doesn’t see how we can win. They have the numbers and the power on their side, no matter how stacked this particular ship is.”

He stares out into the darkness. “This was going to have to happen eventually. A system like this—corrupt from the top to the bottom—can’t be fixed from within it. I believed it could at one point, but I was wrong.”

“I know.” I sigh. I hesitate over the reveal of Siobhan’s ancestry, but ultimately this is Bowen, a former captain, and one of the most honorable people I know. I…want his input. “There’s one other thing. Siobhan is a noble and sister to Morrigan. She’s been believed to be dead for sixteen years, but now Morrigan knows the truth.” I take a deep breath. “And they’re both descended from the original C?n Annwn.”

Bowen whistles under his breath. “A lot of hefty secrets.”

I don’t have it in me to be the charming captain in this moment. That particular mask feels too constricting right now. “Yeah.”

“So she’s descended from the originals.” He doesn’t look at me as he speaks. “Even if the people believe that, do you think it will change things?”

“I don’t know. It would have if she was the only one left, if we could spread word faster than the C?n Annwn could suffocate the truth…but she’s not the only one.”

He nods. “Morrigan.”

“Morrigan,” I agree. “And the fact that they were a noble family, hiding their bloodline. The rest of Threshold has a very understandable distrust of Lyari nobles. Even if she shifted fully in the middle of every village in the realm, there would be plenty of people who wouldn’t be swayed. The C?n Annwn won’t risk it. It’s in their best interest that this rebellion doesn’t have a true hero to follow.”

“A problem no matter which way you look at it.” Bowen, the giant of a man, one of the most powerful beings I know, shudders. “Morrigan isn’t going to stop coming until Siobhan and the rest of us are dead.”

“Or unless we kill her first.” I lean back and look at the stars overhead. We’re moving fast enough that I can almost believe we are the ones standing still and they’re streaming around us. “Some of the baddest motherfuckers in Threshold have tried to over the years. They’ve all failed.” I was never foolish enough to attempt it. I know when a fight is a losing one.

Just like the one before us. “I don’t see a way through, Bowen. The rebellion is far-reaching, but its strength is in its secrecy. The C?n Annwn are so fucking powerful.”

“There’s an…” Bowen trails off and shakes his head. “I’m sorry. My memory of the time before Threshold is filled with holes. Or, more accurately, more hole than anything else. No matter how hard I try, that time is a giant blank.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” Bowen was scooped out of the sea like so many people. The main difference was his age. He was young—too young, honestly—but that ship’s captain at the time, Ezra, was as good a person as you could be sailing under the C?n Annwn. He was a true believer, but for all that, he kept his crew in line and never let a local be hurt under his watch. That’s more than most captains do.

Bowen shakes his head, hard enough that it’s as if he’s sure he can shake out the information dancing just out of reach. “There’s a legend,” he says slowly. “I can only catch the edges of it, so I’m not sure if it’s from Threshold or…before.”

“Bowen, it’s okay.” I pat him on the shoulder. We don’t always get along, but he’s been invaluable since he joined the crew. “Don’t strain yourself.”

He’s still staring out into the darkness, brows furrowed. “How is the Wild Hunt called?”

I blink. “Excuse me?”

“The Wild Hunt. Evelyn talked about it at one point.” He scrubs his hand over his face. “The C?n Annwn, the originals, used to run with it, at least in her realm. A great magical hunt that swept across the land. Anyone caught out on nights like that were taken.”

I shiver. That sounds just as dangerous as any individual element if left to run rampant. “That’s not part of our legends.” Evelyn and Lizzie both come from the same realm, one where the magical folks operate in secret and most of humanity is mundane. Still, since Threshold connects to all realms, it stands to reason that some of our histories would overlap. At least if they were histories instead of legends.

“No, I guess it isn’t.” He shrugs. “Siobhan and Morrigan might be the last of the originals, but what if they’re not? We’ve always been taught that the originals are unknowable and untethered to our world. What if it isn’t true?”

I smile despite myself. “You sound like Evelyn right now.” There’s nothing the witch loves more than questions. It’s delightful and aggravating by turns.

“I suppose I do.”

“It’s something to chase down.” I pat his shoulder again and shift back, breaking the contact. “I’ll talk to Siobhan about it in the morning.”

“Good.” He glances at me. “Try to get some sleep tonight. You’re no use to anyone if you fall over from exhaustion because of all the brooding.”

That surprises me enough to laugh. “You can’t have the market cornered on brooding, darling. It’s rude.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He turns and starts to move away, but stops before he takes two steps. “I meant what I said, Nox. We’re with you. All of us.”

I wait for him to walk away to speak. “I know,” I whisper. “That’s what I’m afraid of.” I believe in the cause. Deeply. I always have.

It’s just my luck that I’ve finally found the community I’ve spent my entire life searching for…only for every single member to be in immediate and fatal danger. Just in time for both Bastian and Siobhan to be aboard, both so damn magnetic that I’ve fled my own damn cabin to escape thoughts of them.

I shake my head. Guess I didn’t do a particularly good job of escaping. What’s done is done, and Bastian is ancient history. It just doesn’t feel like ancient history with the man himself on my ship, disrupting things with his presence. And Siobhan? She’s a future that was never mine to have. Not when she and Bastian have been together for well over a decade at this point.

They met a year after he watched me walk away. A fucking year .

That’s no time at all in the grand scheme of things. I exhale slowly. I shouldn’t be mad all this time later. Life on Hedd’s ship wasn’t particularly pleasant even after I worked my way up to be quartermaster at record speed. And Bastian was a noble-born second son who had never worked a day in his life. It would have ended in disaster.

Knowing that doesn’t allow me to rationalize out of the hurt I feel knowing he did leave his privileged life on Lyari. For Siobhan. Not me.

I give myself a shake and head back to the helm. Eyal is there, just like Bowen said. I nod at him. “Set course for Barth.”

He raises his brows. “Barth is closer than I’d expect you to want to be after our quick escape.”

“I know.” It’s less than a day from where I estimate us to be now. “Morrigan will expect us to head to the farthest side of Threshold. This time of year, Barth should have a dozen islands in close proximity. We’ll be able to lose them there, even if they somehow follow us.” There are countless ways to track… “Fuck.”

“What?” Eyal lifts his voice as I dodge past him toward my cabin. “Nox?”

I ignore him and duck into my cabin. The desk contains the magic that allows communication between the Council and the Audacity . It also allows them to track our movements. If Morrigan hasn’t already reported our treason, she will soon. We need the desk gone and gone now. There’s no fucking time . I was a fool for not thinking of it immediately.

As tired as I am, I draw forth the last dregs of power within me and concentrate on setting the desk aflame—without letting it spread. Fire is a fickle creature, more temperamental than the others. Most elemental users only control one, so I’ve never been able to get a satisfying answer out of the others if they feel like their element has a personality. All four have had personalities to me since the beginning.

Hot and hotter, draining my power at an exponentially faster rate than normal. The desk is spelled, resisting my efforts. “Burn, damn it.” I flick open the small window, diverting power I can’t afford to use wind to whisk the smoke out of the room.

The space wavers before my eyes, but I muscle down and focus harder. If we have a chance at all of escaping, we need this thing gone. There’s a pounding between my ears that feels like someone is ringing a bell right next to my head, but I ignore it.

Finally— finally —the desk crumples. It takes even more effort to catch every spark and divert it out the window. I should get the pieces of the desk, too…

It’s the last thought I have before everything goes gray and I slump to the floor.