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Shine needed to figure his shit out. The problems with Rowan were getting to him. He shouldn’t have pushed for sex. He knew she hadn’t been ready, but his dick had gotten in the way. She needed more time to heal, and he’d been stupid for thinking she was ready.

“Come on, Shine. Get your ass in gear.”

He was on the obstacle course, moving slower than normal. Thinking about Rowan was getting him in trouble. He crossed the finish line and moved to the water.

“What’s wrong?” Apple asked.

“Nothing.”

Apple rolled his eyes. “Stop lying.”

He downed water and then shook his head. "I don't know what to do."

Apple smirked. “Now you’re talking. Whatever you’re doing isn’t working. I can tell you that much.”

Anger rose. “Duh. Thanks for the observation.”

Griz came over and slapped him on the back. “Apple is right. You need to get your head out of your ass. What is wrong? ”

He blew out a breath. "Rowan is having a difficult time. She was getting better, and then…" He shook his head. "I can't blame it on her. I pushed her, and she reacted."

"You mean you thought about having sex, and it was too much?" Griz asked.

He shook his head. “Fuck. I’m such an asshole.”

Squat scratched the back of his head. “Maybe not. I mean, maybe she just needs some time.”

“She needs time and someone to talk to. I need to find a therapist we can both go to. I think she’s having flashbacks. I mean, she was much better, and now she’s worse. I’m mad at myself for not realizing how bad she was.”

“PTSD is a bitch,” Sharp said. “It takes a long time to get to a place of equilibrium.”

Shine huffed out a sigh. “I don’t want to be a total bitch about this, but I need to figure out what is going on and fix it.”

“Maybe we can help,” Jay said.

“How?”

“We can chat with some of the other SEALs who’ve had to go through stuff with their women. Maybe someone knows of a therapist you two can see.”

Shine shrugged. “I need all the help I can get. I hate that she’s having issues.”

They finished the course and started their jog back to the buildings across the road to shower and get dressed. The obstacle course training had picked up because they were training for work in an urban area. Wars and terrorists never gave them a break, and now it seemed like the terrorists were hell-bent on operating in an urban area. They would probably be headed out in the next few months unless something big happened and everyone calmed the fuck down .

After his shower, he grabbed his phone and saw he had a few missed calls from Rowan's office. He dialed, glad the receptionist picked up on the first ring. Once he identified himself, the woman launched into a worried rant.

"The coffee shop called, saying they had Rowan's purse and tablet. She'd taken off. Just ran out of the shop. Who does that? Why did she run away? I don't get it. What do I need to do?"

“Hold up,” Shine interrupted. “Where was she?”

"Coffee shop. I'll text you the address. The owner knows Rowan because it's close to the office, and she's a regular."

“Okay. So what happened?”

"Some guy came in, and Rowan was agitated. Then she took off. She just left. The person working at the shop called because Rowan left everything, even her phone."

Shine's muscles tensed as he listened. Something had gone terribly wrong. It was his fault. It had to be. How could he fix this?

“Thank you for calling. Could you send me the address so I can go by and talk to them?”

"Sure. I'll text the address. Please find her."

“I’ll do everything I can to find her.”

The call ended, leaving him more bereft than ever. He shoved his phone in his pocket before he tossed it across the room. Lashing out wouldn’t help. He drew in a slow breath and held it for a few counts before letting it go. Then he did it again, trying to force himself to calm the heck down.

“Shine, what’s wrong?” Sharp asked.

Shine clenched his teeth and then shook all over before opening his eyes. "She was at a coffee shop and ran. She left her phone and everything else behind. That was her receptionist. I don't know where she is or what is going on."

“Crap. Do you have the address of the coffee shop?”

Shine nodded. “Yeah. But we have another hour?—”

“Fuck work,” Sharp said. “We’ll make something up. An exercise off base. I’ll text our CO and tell him what’s going on. He’ll cover for us.”

Jay pulled on his clean shirt. “We’ve got you. We’ll head to the shop and then start searching from there. Don’t worry, we’ll find her.”

“Fuck. This is my fault,” Sharp said as he grabbed his clothes.

“How is this your fault?”

Sharp shook his head. “She was freaked out, and I didn’t insist she see someone immediately. I didn’t realize how bad it was. I should have done something.”

"Dude, you can't blame yourself for everything," Squat said. "We'll find her, and then we can help you make it right."

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. Fuck.”

He had royally screwed up. Rowan had shown signs, but he'd not wanted to push. Now, he knew he should have pushed hard. He should have forced her to get help. Maybe he could have convinced her to get into intense therapy.

No question, he would have to do more to help her. He might need to take a few days off. She deserved more, and he hadn’t done enough. He swore to himself he would fix this. He had to.