Page 5 of Please Don’t Go (The Midnight Strike #1)

DANIEL

“She’s alive,” Angel says, slashing the silence in my car.

In return, I only exhale a breath, keeping my eyes glued to Josefine’s Mercedes-Benz.

We’re following behind her, making sure she gets home safely. She protested against us accompanying her, said she had it all under control, and to some degree I believe that, but she’s driving with a spare, so I didn’t want to risk it.

I’m also struggling to believe she’s really here and not…dead.

I hate thinking that but ever since I left the cliff with Angel on New Year’s Day, wondering what she ended up doing has been plaguing my mind.

Even though I’m driving behind her, eyes laser focused on her car, I can’t help but feel like this is some kind of dream. I’m afraid to wake up and find out she did jump.

I’m also afraid this might be a nightmare. That she’ll drive me to the cliff side, and she’ll have me watch her step off the edge, and I won’t be able to do anything about it.

“Daniel.” Angel softly punches my arm.

I blink, my hands gripping the steering wheel tighter. “Sorry, what?”

“Relax. She’s alive,” he says lightly, voice humor filled to ease the tension, but it does nothing for me.

“I pulled her back…” My skin flares with goose bumps, and a cold shiver runs down my spine.

“What?”

I didn’t tell him that part because I couldn’t bring myself to voice it then. Even now, it’s hard to get it out because I’m afraid it’ll still happen. That I’ll speak it into existence.

My hold on the wheel loosens and I grimace at how wet my palms are. “She just…took a step. It was a determined but defeated step like…” I bite the inside of my cheek as the memories of that night resurface. “She was ready to go and had given up on the world.”

My stomach painfully sinks, and I find it difficult to breathe. Even swallowing becomes hard. I try but the harder I do, the more intense the pain feels and unfolds throughout. And the place it hurts the most and worst is in my chest.

All the pain resides there, making itself known.

“Are you serious? What would you have done if she would’ve pulled you with her?

What the hell were you thinking? You could’ve died.

” He’s exasperated and from the corner of my eye, I see him shake his head, his mussed straight black hair swaying on his forehead.

“You should’ve immediately called the police.

That wasn’t the time to play fucking hero! ”

“They wouldn’t have made it on time. What was I supposed to do, just stand back and watch her fucking go?

” I raise my voice, quickly veering my gaze to his before shifting it back to the road.

“Then what? Move on? Pretend I didn’t see a human being end their life?

Just carry on and pretend it’s all goddamn right? Is that what I’m supposed to do?”

“That’s exactly what you do because that’s life. That’s how it fucking works. You can’t save everyone. You just fucking can’t,” he coldly states.

“Fuck you.” I sneer.

“Yeah, well I’d rather you be mad than dead.” His reply is just as cold as his last statement.

Leave it to Angel to be a dick, but at least he’s an honest one. He’s not wrong, but I couldn’t watch her go.

“If that was you, I would’ve dragged you back,” I say after a beat.

He huffs out a depleted breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said all of that. I would’ve done the same thing if I had been in your position. I…I’d hate for something to happen to you.”

“It wouldn’t have, but I get where you’re coming from.”

Neither one of us says a thing after. The silence is thick and suffocating, until he opens his mouth and says the most Angel thing.

“She didn’t fall in love with you.”

“Huh?”

“You saved her and she didn’t fall for you. She even said she didn’t know you. That must’ve butchered your ego.” Amusement douses his words, along with the tension we were submerging in.

“Shut up. It doesn’t bother me. I’m just glad she’s okay.” At least I hope she is. Physically, she looks like she is, but I don’t know about emotionally.

“Damn…” He whistles as we pull into a road that’s lined with the most luxurious-looking beach houses. “The Mercedes makes sense now.”

I nod in agreement, staring with amazement at her house as we pull into the driveway.

When she steps out of her car, Pen does too. She also decided to come because she was afraid Josefine would feel uncomfortable with us.

I don’t climb out, afraid this was all just a dream or a nightmare.

“She’s okay,” Angel voices, reeling me back in. “She’s alive because of you. She’s okay,” he repeats like he knows it’s what I need to hear to feel reassured.

Still the question, is she really though , echoes in my head as we get out. As Angel stands next to me, I ask him something I never thought I would.

“Can you distract Pen for me? I need to talk to Josefine alone.”

He scrunches his nose, the staring at her like she’s already inconveniencing him. “Fine but I can’t promise there won’t be any arguing.”

“It’ll just be a few minutes,” I say as we walk over to the girls.

They don’t hate each other, but they don’t care for each other either. I would say their relationship is like a brother and sister, which is great. I’d hate for Angel to get involved with my sister. Considering he’s not a relationship kind of person and Pen is.

Not that it matters. Pen got out of a relationship a few months ago and is still reeling from it.

And I trust Angel enough to know he wouldn’t touch my sister. I don’t care who he messes with, but Pen is off-limits.

“But if she pisses me off, I’m tossing her ass in the ocean,” he teases, but I hear the slight seriousness behind it.

“Don’t touch her,” I warn.

“Can’t make any promises.” I hear the smile in his voice, but I can’t threaten him anymore as we stand in front of the girls.

Pen like always is running her mouth, speaking a million words a minute while Josefine stands there listening to her. She looks like she’s absorbing it all, but she also looks like her mind is somewhere else. That’s until Angel interrupts Pen.

“I know you took my mini boxing gloves from my rearview mirror,” he accuses.

Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. He’s been saying that for a year and swears it was Pen who took them.

“It wasn’t me. Maybe it was one of your many?—”

“I’m going to check your car because I don’t believe you.” His small gold hoop earrings sway as he pivots on his heel, before she can get a word out. She follows after him, leaving Josefine and me alone.

I look at her, but I feel like I’m not really seeing her. She’s so fucking close, I could take a step and close the space between us, but at the same time, she feels so far away.

For the first time in my life, I’m speechless.

Since that night, I’ve been thinking of everything I’d say to Josefine if I ever ran into her, but now that she’s standing in front of me, I can’t open my mouth.

I find myself soaking her in, feeling a whirl of emotions that leave me feeling perplexed.

“Well, uh, good night,” she quietly says, voice low, and I almost don’t hear her.

“Wait, please don’t go.” My fingers twitch at my side, begging to touch her to make sure this is all real, but I fist them and keep them where they’re at. “I want to talk to you.”

She looks unsure, her gaze flitting to Pen and Angel before meeting mine again. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Please…Josie.” I heard my sister call her that. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t say it just to test it out on my tongue. It’s just as pretty as Josefine.

She raises her hand to her other arm, rubbing it up and down, before she tentatively nods. “Okay, give me a second. I need to get my groceries.”

“I’ll help you,” I offer, but she shakes her head.

“I’ve got it.” She opens the trunk and inside are five paper bags filled to the brim.

I grab them before she can reach the first one. “I know, but I want to help.”

I hear her huff frustratedly as she shuts the trunk and pushes the button on the key fob to lock her car. “You have to stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Helping me. I’m not helpless,” she says as we walk side by side to the entrance of her house.

“Never said you were.”

Unlocking her door, she lets me go in first, but my mom raised me right. I don’t go in until she does. Once we’re in, she flicks the light on, leads me farther inside, and motions for me to set the bags on the kitchen counter.

I realize this is the first time I’m actually seeing her in the light. It’s wrong because this isn’t the moment to check her out but wow…she’s…beautiful.

Raven-black hair, deep brown eyes, and skin a golden tan. Her turquoise shirt is extremely loose and so are her shorts, but they’re mid-thigh, so I catch a quick glimpse of her muscular thighs. I fix my gaze back on the logo of her shirt.

“You’re a swimmer?” I voice out loud without thinking.

“Was.” She tucks a tendril of her hair behind her ear, then crosses her arms as if she’s self-conscious. “What did you want to talk about?”

Straight to the point. I wish I could read her, but her face is apathetic. Nothing, not even a flicker of light, shines in her eyes.

My stomach knots at what I’m about to ask, and my heart races the way it did that night. My mind screams to let it go, and move on because she’s alive like Angel said, but I know if I don’t ask, I won’t be able to.

“Can I touch you?”

Josefine stares, surprised, and takes a few steps back. “Why?”

That sounded better in my head. “Because I need to make sure this is real,” I pathetically admit. “I need to make sure my mind isn’t playing games with me. I—I know this sounds bizarre, but please. I promise I won’t make it weird. I just need to touch you. I need to know I’m not dreaming, Josie.”

Her eyes drop to my hands, then at my chest, and I wonder if she can hear it. If she can feel how unstable my heart is right now. How it’s thundering at a rate that no doctor would consider normal.

The seconds draw out agonizingly slow and I wonder, how badly did I mess up? That was weird. Why did I ask that? Of course I messed up. Way to make her uncomfortable.

“I’m sor?—”

“Okay.” She cuts me off, confliction swimming in her earthy brown eyes. “That’s fine. You can touch me.”

My brows almost hike up, but I stop myself, keeping a poker face before she changes her mind.

She stands in her spot, but that’s okay because I go to her. As I stand next to her, I note how much taller I am than her. She’s not short, but I definitely tower over her.

I don’t dwell on that as I look at her face. She’s staring at my chest, but I hear her breath softly hitch as I raise my hand. She must have her eyes on it, tracking its movement until it’s a mere inch away from her cheek.

Please be real, I chant in my head.

I hold my breath as my large palm connects with the skin of her warm cheek and when I finally cup it, I feel all the weight of that night disappear.

You couldn’t ask me what time or day or year we’re in; it’s all nonexistent. I don’t realize I’m still holding my breath until my lungs beg for a speck of air. Just one inhale, that’s all I take, as I drag the pad of my thumb along the smooth plane of her cheek.

My eyes flutter closed for a second before I open them again and tip her head back. I should let go, but when her eyes collide with mine, I’m struck by how little I see and how much I feel.

“Josie…”

“Hmm?” Her eyes never leave mine.

“I’m so happy you’re here.”

“You wouldn’t let go.” Her voice wavers, fragile like that night.

“I couldn’t and I wouldn’t.”

“Did you not get my note?”

I caress her cheek, reveling in how soft it feels and how very much alive she is. “I did.”

“Did you have doubts?”

“Nightmares.”

“Didn’t mean to put you through that.”

“I know.”

“You don’t have to worry anymore. You know I’m here. We can go back to pretending we don’t know each other.”

“Your favorite color is yellow, but you don’t like neon yellow.”

Aside from the slight twitch of her brow, I see nothing.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” she hollowly whispers.

“That means everything,” I say, filling that empty space.

She stays silent and I want to break her out of it, ask her questions to fill the void, but the moment is shattered. We part, my hand dropping fast, as a knock on the front door fills the quiet house.

“I have a really busy day tomorrow.” She crosses her arms against her chest, adding more distance between us, her expression blank. But I know what she’s saying without having to say it. Get out.

“Yeah, right. I’ll see you around?” I shouldn’t, but there’s a tinge of hopefulness with my question.

“Maybe.” Not really is what it sounds like, and my hope evaporates.

“Okay, good night, Josefine.” I flash her a smile and spin on my heel. I hear her say, “good night,” as I make it to the front door. I hesitate, not walking forward, but I have nothing left to do here, so I force myself out.

She’s alive, that’s what you wanted. You touched her, that’s what you needed.

There’s nothing left between us.