Page 20 of Playoff (Toronto Blaze #4)

Yes, yes, YES!

Jess

I knew Justin wasn’t handling the Denny thing well, which he’d proved by agreeing to go to the All-Star Game when I brought it up.

He wouldn’t talk about it though. He’d refused to say anything ten years ago when he and Mia broke up, and he went to New York.

He wouldn’t talk about Sharleen after she pushed him onto the scandal sheets. He definitely didn’t talk about it now.

His standard response was that he was fine. Well, he wasn’t fine, and if this issue was affecting team chemistry, then it was serious, because hockey was Justin’s biggest thing. Outside of family, nothing was more important. He wouldn’t want to let his team down.

Damn it. I wanted to believe it when he said everything was good, but deep down I’d always known he wasn’t telling the truth. It was so frustrating. When he wouldn’t talk, it was impossible to know just what he was keeping tight inside him.

I didn’t want to share his secrets, especially with Denny.

It was a betrayal, or at least Justin would see it that way.

But if Denny understood some of what Justin had been through, maybe he would be patient with him.

Denny hadn’t actually done anything to us, so it might help Justin, and him, and team dynamics, if the man knew why my brother was so triggered by the Denbrowski name.

Not just the events of that summer, but my parents’ behavior ever since.

I listened for footsteps, but didn’t hear any sounds from Fitch so I settled back against the pillows, breathing in. I recognized the scent from the night in the hotel. Cologne? Body wash? Not likely shampoo considering how short his hair was.

“Okay, I’ll tell you some of our history, so you understand this isn’t just about losing a retirement account. Please don’t tell Justin I told you this, but it might help you understand.”

I glanced at Denny, and he nodded.

I hoped this wouldn’t backfire. “First, a bit of backstory. My mom is from a wealthy family, my dad middle class. He was working at a travel agency in Vancouver when he met her. She was spoiled—an only child who’d never had to consider a budget in her life.

Mom and Dad got married and started their own agency but it was mostly just an excuse to travel with their friends.

” It was a sop to Dad’s family’s concerns that he would be too dependent on my mom financially.

Those deep brown eyes narrowed. “How did traveling work after you two were born? Did they cart you around with them?”

Not likely. “Dad’s mom, Grandma, lives in Port Coquitlam, just outside Vancouver. Justin and I spent a lot of time with her while Mom and Dad were on trips. We ended up going to school in PoCo because it was easier than commuting to Vancouver.”

I paused, and Denny handed me a water bottle. I smiled my thanks and took a sip.

“Justin started dating Mia in high school and the two of them were really serious. Crazy serious. It was a little freaky. He was able to live in PoCo because he’d been drafted as a junior by the Vancouver WHL team and so we didn’t have to deal with him being billeted somewhere else.

He was selected in the second round at the NHL draft by New York, just after grad, but he wanted to go to college instead of trying out for the team.

He thought he’d end up playing for the farm team for a few years and he said he’d rather get a degree while he could. ”

Denny nodded. He hadn’t gone to college, I knew, because of Mom researching everything about the Denbrowskis.

I settled farther into the pillows. “After the draft, I went to England for the summer—to experience all the places in those classic British books I loved. The moors, the Lake District, Bath, London…” I’d enjoyed that, so much, but I hadn’t realized what was going on at home. “Justin had been accepted at SFU.”

Denny tilted his head with a questioning look.

“Simon Fraser University. The hockey program there wasn’t anywhere near as good as the American schools, and his team in New York was not impressed.

But that’s where Mia was going, so that’s where he wanted to be.

I wasn’t kidding when I said they were serious.

He knew it could hurt his chances of making it to the NHL, but he loved her more than hockey. ”

Denny’s eyebrows shot up. “Why didn’t she go to another school then, something that had a better hockey program? Maybe in Seattle—that’s not too far.”

“Her family. She never knew her biological father, but her mother remarried when she was about eight, and she had two half-siblings. Her mother developed arthritis, pretty bad, and her stepdad was a long-distance trucker. Her mom couldn’t handle the kids on her own, and her stepdad was supporting the family, so Mia did a lot of the work around the house.

Laundry, meals, groceries, things like that.

Her siblings were about ten years younger than her. Mia had to stay close.”

Justin respected her decision, and wanted to be around to help too, when he could.

Hence his decision to go to the closest school, no matter what the hockey program was like.

I’d thought it was romantic. I’d never had that kind of relationship, where I’d jeopardize important things to be with that person.

But then, we never thought we’d have money problems, so gambling with Justin’s hockey career didn’t seem that much of a risk.

Denny interrupted my chain of thought. “That was the summer my parents skipped the country.”

I nodded. “Yeah. It happened while I was in the UK. My parents had invested everything with them. All my mom’s money, our college funds.

They’d even mortgaged our house and the condo in California.

” I’d found out afterward that they’d been going through Mom’s inheritance pretty quickly, so they wanted to ensure they could maintain their lifestyle.

Hence investing everything in investments that promised a high rate of return.

They didn’t appreciate that high rates of return came with high risk.

“Fuck,” he said.

I shot him a glance. Fuck was a good description.

“I was in England, enjoying myself, and didn’t appreciate just how bad it was.

I knew Mom and Dad had lost some money but I didn’t know how much.

It wasn’t until my credit cards didn’t work anymore that it started to sink in.

” I’d been embarrassed and upset with my parents, but I thought they’d been late making a payment.

“They were in a panic, and convinced Justin he had to start playing hockey for money so the family would survive.”

I hadn’t been there to check what they were saying. At that point, I probably wouldn’t have questioned them. Not until later, when…

“They manipulated him?”

It was like he was continuing my train of thought.

I considered my words. “They didn’t know what to do.

Mom had never been without money, and Dad hadn’t worried about finances for years.

They still had the travel agency, but that never made a lot of real money.

They thought if they found the right lawyers and investigators, they’d get everything back.

They told Justin they needed him to keep us afloat until then. ”

“So he went to New York.”

I nodded. “By the time I was able to get home he’d already withdrawn from school and told the team he was coming.”

“And his girlfriend?”

“She couldn’t go because of her family. She thought Justin shouldn’t be sacrificing their future to support them. And me. The two of them fought, said things, and broke up. I don’t know all the details because you might have noticed Justin isn’t big on sharing, but I got the gist of it.”

Denny opened his own water bottle and took a long swallow.

I watched his throat ripple for a moment before remembering it was a bad idea to dwell too much on how good he looked, especially with the two of us on his bed, stuck in his room for a while.

Ugh! Knowing what I was passing up made it worse. I pushed those thoughts down.

Denny, unaware of my inner struggle, screwed the cap back on his water bottle. “He lost college, his girl, and had to move across the country. So he lost his home and friends too.”

I nodded. “And then came the whole shit show that was Sharleen.”

“Fuck. I’d almost forgotten that.”

Everyone in hockey knew the Sharleen story.

It made it to the attention of the celebrity gossip sites, and the media had run with it.

“He doesn’t talk about her. But I know my twin.

He was on his own, heartbroken about Mia, and my parents were pressuring him for money.

I think he got together with her to have someone on his side.

” If I’d only known how bad it was for him.

But he hadn’t said anything, and I was juggling school with a long commute and finally scoring a part-time job so that I didn’t have to pressure him for money.

It was quiet for a few minutes. Like always, I felt guilty and wished I could have a do-over of that time. I should have come to New York for school. Kept him company. But back in BC I was trying to keep peace between Grandma and Mom while they shared a house, and that was no picnic either.

Denny broke the silence. “No wonder he hates me.”

There was something in his voice. A resignation, like this wasn’t the first time he’d dealt with bearing the burden of his parents’ crimes.

I turned to face him. “I don’t think he hates you, not as a person.

He doesn’t know you, and you didn’t do anything to him.

I mean, if you’d been involved, you’d have skipped the country with them. ”

His lips twisted. “Not everyone believes that.”

He was right. My parents were prime examples. But that wasn’t the problem with my twin.

“With Justin, I think it’s just your name. It’s so wrapped up in what we’ve gone through these past few years. My parents didn’t take it well, and we’re both so tired of them talking about your parents.”

Denny sat up on his knees and began to bounce. I stared, and then heard footsteps. Right. Fitch was heading this way. Showtime.

I moaned. Denny shot me a look, eyebrow raised. Guess that moan wasn’t good enough for him. I lay back, rubbing my hands through my hair and writhing on the bed while I let out a long, escalating cry of “ Denny. ”

He stopped bouncing and shook his head at me, but the corners of his mouth curled up in a smile. Then he bounced again and I moaned, fighting back giggles.

After a couple of minutes, he stopped and held up a hand. I lay still. “Is he gone?” I whispered.

“I don’t think so.” He kept his voice equally quiet. “But we’ll change position.”

I leaned up on an arm. “Yeah?”

“You on top.”

I blinked at him. He stretched out on the bed, arms behind his head. I frowned. “Why?”

“Because I don’t think I can keep up the bouncing.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re supposed to have all this stamina as an athlete.”

“If I’ve been pounding the bed that hard since I came in here, even my stamina would be giving out.”

“Fine.”

I got up on my knees, ready to fake it, but an evil idea snuck out of my lizard brain, and I slung my leg over him so I was sitting on his thighs. Not quite where I’d be if we were really having sex, but close.

He narrowed his eyes and whispered. “What are you doing?”

I smiled at him. “Just making it realistic.”

I raised myself on my knees and dropped on his thighs. They flexed under me, thick and muscular. The bed gave a bounce.

“Oh, Denny!” I moaned. “There, right there!”

His jaw clenched. I lifted a hand to my hair, pulling it up and letting my other hand fall over my chest. I was tempted to grope my breasts, but the crazy person who was taking over for me wasn’t quite that bold.

His hands gripped my hips and held me. I heard footsteps going down the hall back to the living room.

“Right there, baby,” he gritted out.

“Yes , yes , YES!” I did my best Meg Ryan impersonation.

A hand slid up my back and gripped the nape of my neck. He pulled me down, till we were face-to-face. I stopped moving and the condo was silent around us.

“Unless you want to do this for real, you might want to tone down your performance.”

His pupils were wide and his breathing had sped up. At this angle, I could feel that he was hard beneath me. I was panting too, and I could only blame so much on my bouncing. I wanted a repeat of that night. To forget my responsibilities and be selfish. But I couldn’t do that.

Not to my brother. Not after all he’d done for me, for our family.

I didn’t have to be a monk. I didn’t have to pass up a potential relationship. But not with this man.

So I apologized, and as his grip loosened I rolled off him. “How much longer is the skills competition on for?” I couldn’t get out of here fast enough.