Page 2

CHAPTER 2

AXEL

A YEAR AGO (AGE 19)

M y freshman year at Langston could only be described as claustrophobic. My parents always popped up, attending one college event after another. Not to see me and not to watch my games, nope. They showed up when there was a public event with press around. I was brought in to smile and prop up their image. It was all about public relations.

Like today, when I got called in to the Dean of Students’ office. The college was opening a new international business school, and the campus was crawling with anticipation. And media. I knew exactly what that meant and why I was called away from class.

Inevitably, my parents would be here. Fuck.

As I passed the hallway that led to the dean’s office, I noticed several pictures of my father and grandfather. Their photographs were all over the damn school. Given that they’d attended Langston and more importantly, were one of the college’s biggest donors, it wasn’t surprising. There was the Lund Scholarship Fund, the Lund Football Field, and the Lund Library, to name a few. They’d probably rename the whole college in a few years. Everywhere I looked, they were there. It creeped me out because it was like being watched twenty-four seven. Not only that, but my teammates and fellow students acted weird around me. I was always invited to parties and stuff, but no one wanted to have any real conversations with me, like they were wary of saying a bad word. They were probably worried that if I didn’t like them, I’d have them thrown out of the school, or something. Not that I would ever do anything like that.

My parents, on the other hand…

Fuck, I needed to get out of here. Like, yesterday.

Instead, I swallowed down my frustration and gave my name to the dean’s receptionist, who quickly guided me to his office, a room with dark wood walls, shelves of books, and the heavy scent of leather and old money.

Dean Jacobs sat at his desk with my parents opposite him.

Like I did when I was ready to hit the ice, I pushed aside my fear and faced my opponent head-on.

I got my size from the Lund side of the family, and thankfully, I was now taller than my father. Finally I had one advantage. His formerly auburn hair was now gray, and his brown eyes showed no expression. He stared at me like he was looking at a stranger, rather than his own son. My mother matched him perfectly, her icy blond bob accentuating the bluest, but coldest, eyes I’d ever seen.

My parents stood up to greet me with a nod and an awkward hello. No hugs in this family.

“Axel, good to see you,” Dean Jacobs announced with a polite, but entirely fake, smile. “We need you for photographs at the opening this afternoon.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that,” I replied. “I’ve got hockey practice.”

Dean Jacobs waved his hand. “I’ve already spoken to Coach Williams about your absence.”

“But—”

“You heard the dean,” my father snapped. “This is far more important. Every major donor to this college will be there. It’s time for you to forget about this stupid fixation with hockey and focus on your future. Your real future. Making connections. That’s why you’re here.”

“Hockey’s my future,” I bit out. “And I don’t care about making connections. I don’t want or need that kind of education.”

“It’s what’s expected,” my father insisted with a clipped voice. “You’re a representative of this family and this school, and you will do well to remember that.”

There was no point in arguing in front of the dean, it would only make life harder for me.

Instead, I nodded and crossed my arms.

“Good.” Dean Jacobs smiled at me, but it was like looking at a shark, all blank eyes and razor-sharp teeth.

Jacobs creeped me out. Then I noticed the way he glanced at my mother, the once-over, and the way she looked back at him. I barely held back an eye roll.

Get me the fuck out of here.

“You’ll be joining us for lunch with the donors,” my mother commanded. “Go change into a suit and meet us at the new pavilion in half an hour.”

“Do you have a script for me too?” I snarked.

“Don’t question us, just do it!” my father barked.

With my father’s booming voice still ringing in my ears I left the room, feeling worse than when I first entered. No surprises there. Being around my parents always left me feeling like total shit, and I desperately wanted to run away.

I stumbled out of the building and headed across campus like a zombie. Was this really going to be my life? Always taking their orders? Never getting out from under their grasp?

I couldn’t do it. I needed a breakaway.

By the time I got back to the dorm, changed, and headed to the pavilion, it was raining heavily, and the gloomy weather suited my mood entirely. I arrived early, but it was fine. I needed a moment to myself. That dreaded spiral of panic set in, and I just knew that no matter what I did or said, I was going to screw this up. And I also knew that tomorrow, I’d replay every word and action in my head. Only, I’d still be lost. I’d hardly want to leave my bed, never mind attending class or hitting the rink.

I sighed as I glanced up at the newest building on campus.

The inaugural international business pavilion was all glass and sharp angles, modern compared to most of the facilities on campus. It didn’t really fit in.

Kinda like you.

I entered the lobby, which was already filling up with attendees, many of them college representatives, donors, and press.

There was a sign near the elevators indicating that the private luncheon was being held on the second floor, but I decided to take the stairs. I needed the walk. Hell, I’d need to walk more than one set of stairs to settle my nerves but it would do for now.

Up here, there was hardly anyone around. It was so eerily quiet that the only sound I heard was the echo of my lonely footsteps.

Until I heard a voice somewhere down the hall.

I followed it but as I drew closer, I realized it wasn’t a stranger, but my father talking. Instead of entering the room right away, I waited outside and listened.

“I’ve had it. I don’t want Axel being brought in for any more of these events,” my father stated. “He’s more of a hindrance at this point. I don’t care about the photo ops, as soon as he opens his mouth it’s clear he won’t or can’t sell the Lund story. He’s fucking useless.”

His words didn’t shock me. Did they hurt? Yes, but I’d learned a long time ago to push that down. Feeling bad for myself didn’t get me anywhere.

I leaned in closer, but stayed behind the door, not wanting him to see me.

“He takes a great picture, and it looks good for the school and therefore for us,” my mother replied. “And we need that publicity now more than ever.”

“If you’d stop fucking every married man you meet, maybe we wouldn’t be in this position,” he snarled. “I’m done paying out hush money. There’s hardly any left to pay out.”

“Make more,” she snapped. “And like you’re one to talk when it comes to spending.”

“I spend money to make money.”

“There’s hardly any of that happening lately.”

Interesting.

“It’s a slow quarter. Property values in some markets are tumbling, and we’re all being hit hard,” he grumbled. “And here’s a novel idea, Venetia, why don’t you find a way to bring in some cash instead of sitting on your ass, or rather, lying on your back?” my father hissed.

“Fuck you, Brad. I did my part. You wanted a son to carry on the family legacy, and I gave you two.”

“Maybe if both of them were mine, I’d agree with you.”

Wait, what?

“Lower your voice,” she whispered. “He’s still a Lund, so what does it matter?”

“Really? Fucking my brother and then passing off his kid as mine doesn’t matter? You’re unreal,” he scoffed. “If Axel was a genius, I’d overlook it. But he’s not. Not even close. All he wants to do is act like a goon with that stupid hockey he’s obsessed with. Fucking idiot.”

I knew there were a lot of family secrets, but I’d never guessed one would be about me. I was suddenly nauseous, feeling like I was going to throw up, until it hit me.

They don’t want this news to get out.

This wasn’t the worst day of my life, but the best.

Instead of hiding outside, and fueled by shock and adrenaline, I stalked into the room.

“Gotta love these family reunions,” I stated.

My comment was met with silence. Silence and frigid glares.

“I think it’s time we talk about my future,” I added. “The one that doesn’t include Langston.”

Maybe I wasn’t as smart as the rest of the Lunds, but I knew one thing. In life, sometimes you had to play dirty to win.

Two months later

Unfortunately, transferring colleges wasn’t as easy as all that. My grades weren’t great, and I relied on my hockey stats to get an acceptance letter.

Only, I didn’t have a choice. I had one offer and that was it. Take it or leave it.

I couldn’t wait to get out of this place. I felt suffocated and at the same time, isolated, and I hated it.

Preston was the first, and only person, I confided in.

Axel: Hey, I’ve got good news and bad news. I’m leaving Langston.

Preston: You finally made it happen. How? Are your parents freaking out?

Axel: They are. I don’t care. And the how isn’t important.

The fuck it wasn’t. Still, I didn’t tell Preston about what I’d done, using a secret to gain favor. Maybe I was more like my family than I wanted to admit? That idea was even scarier than staying here at Langston.

Preston: Don’t push them too far. You still need their money. And their name carries weight.

Axel: I’m not worried.

Preston: And the bad news?

I paused for a moment. I didn’t want to hurt my friend, but he needed to know.

Axel: I only had one offer. From Sutton University.

The college where his ex, Jace Rowland, played.

Preston: Are you shitting me?

Axel: Nope.

Preston: He was such an asshole to me, and now you’re on the same team? WTF?

Axel: I know. But don’t worry. I can handle it. And he’ll get what’s coming to him.

Confronting my family was one thing.

Confronting Jace? Well, that didn’t quite work out the way I imagined.