Page 29 of Perfectly Us

“Glad you like it,” I say before sipping my coffee.

“Are things still weird between us?” Alex moves the straw through his smoothie. “I don’t want it to be.”

“Things are always kinda weird with me, to be honest.” I peer over at him. “But you and me? We’re cool.”

“Cool.” Alex takes a drink and bounces his knee. How does he have so much energy so early in the day? “Oh! Yesterday was our one-week anniversary of bein’ friends. Sorry I didn’t get you anything.”

I snort. “I didn’t know that was something people kept track of.”

“Ruben and I first met on August nineteenth, first day of kindergarten. Every year we eat tamales to celebrate. Last year I got him a cake that said ‘thanks for not killing me yet.’ The lady at the bakery was concerned when she wrote it.”

I can’t help but laugh. Alex said once that he thinks he’s too much for people sometimes, but I’m drawn to his exuberance. His vibrant personality puts me at ease, something not many other people can do.

“So our date is May fifteenth,” I say as a strange warmth fills my belly.

“Mhm.” He chews the end of his straw.

“Even though we only said like two words to each other that night?”

“Doesn’t matter. I knew we’d become friends. And my gut’s rarely wrong.” He pats his stomach.

“I should get ready for my shift,” I say, checking the time on my phone. “But feel free to hang out for a while. There might even be another smoothie in it for you later. Maybe a cake pop.”

“Oh yeah?” He flashes a lopsided grin. “Keep sweet-talking me like that and I might just fall in love with you.”

I know he’s joking, but my heart races faster anyway. Not out of fear or nervousness though. His words bring forth a want I didn’t realize I had until that moment—the longing to be close to another person. The desire for affection and maybe romance.

Not sex. But intimacy.

Is there a difference?

I mull it all around in my head as I discard my cup, put on my apron, and clock in to work. Everyone else seems to view sexuality and romance as black and white. But are there shades of gray? Can there be hints of other colors too? Purple, red, or green?

Green with specks of gold.

Maybe I’ll mention it to Dr. Larson in our next session.

But probably not.

Chapter Seven

Alex

“Dude. Melody and I finally hooked up last night,” Ruben says as we walk through the shopping promenade downtown. People sit at outside tables that are crammed close together, and others walk down the sidewalk with their arms full of shopping bags.

Hot summer days. Though kind of miserable sometimes, I love this time of year.

“And?” We stop beside a candy store, and I turn to him. “How was it?”

“Well…” He scratches at his jaw. “She was a virgin.”

“What? You popped her cherry?”

“Ssh. Not so loud.” He glances around and smiles at an elderly couple passing by. Then his brown eyes move back to me. “Yeah, I did. And fuck, I was nervous too. I never banged a virgin before, so I didn’t want to hurt her.”

“Did you?”

“I don’t think so. She seemed to like it, but you never know with girls. A lot of them fake it.”