Page 54

Vivienne

When the apartment door swings open, I nearly jump out of my skin. I clutch my hand to my chest, heart racing as I spin to find Tenley standing in the doorway, her expression guilty.

"Sorry," she says softly, not meeting my eyes. "I didn't mean to scare you."

I pause the music on my phone. "I was lost in the music." It's half true. I was lost, but more in my thoughts about Xavier and the wedding tonight than the music.

"Your awful dancing gave that away." The hint of attitude she gives me puts me at ease, but it's short-lived when the teasing smile falls off her face and she nods to the couch. "We need to talk. I know you don't have much time, and I feel bad for springing this on you right before the wedding, but it's been--" She blows out a long breath. "It's been really great, just busy." She laughs nervously.

Rambling from my niece is never a good sign. This girl doesn't get nervous, it's not part of her DNA. I take her hand in mine--it's as much to put me at ease as it is to encourage her.

"Tenley. Nothing you tell me could make me love you any less."

"Well, duh. I'm awesome."

Her smile isn't as cocky as I'd like, but it's a start. "Then why don't you just tell me what's going on?"

"I'm moving out."

My brows pull together in confusion. This isn't the first time I've heard her talk about getting her own place, but I thought she would wait until next semester. Housing near campus is going to be impossible to find this time of year, and I'm almost certain Xavier wouldn't offer to move her in as a nanny without giving me a heads-up.

"Does one of your friends need a roommate?" I ask, trying to make sense of the timing.

"Not exactly."

I run my thumb along the bridge of my nose. "Okay. Where are you going?"

"I'm moving to Spain."

My stomach bottoms out.

She's not just moving out, she's moving out of the country. I open my mouth to say something, but I can't form words. I don't know what to say.

"It's not forever, but I leave in eight weeks. And when I get back, I'm going to find housing on campus."

"What?" I finally choke out. "Why so fast?"

"It's a study abroad program. I'll be there for the spring semester and summer. I have plenty of money saved from working, and I want to go early and explore Europe for a few weeks before classes start."

I blink back the tears welling up at the torrent of emotions. Pride, confusion, and yeah, a little sadness. "Tenley, that's amazing . . . Can I ask how long you've been planning this? I'm thrilled for you even if I'm going to miss the hell out of you, but this is um . . . unexpected."

"My advisor and I have been meeting for months, but I finalized things last week. I wanted to make sure everything was set before I told you."

The back of my neck prickles with discomfort at what she's not saying. "What does that mean? Were you waiting to be accepted?"

Her eyes drop to her lap. "No, I had a spot, but I didn't want to tell you until I was sure I was going to take it."

Sure, my stomach sank when she first mentioned it, but I'm not too selfish to understand what a great opportunity this is for her. It breaks my heart that she thinks I'd be anything less than happy for her, even if I'm sad for me. "This is a life-changing opportunity. Why wouldn't you jump at it?"

"There was a lot to consider. My classes, the commitment I made to Xavier . . . and I wanted to make sure you would be okay without me."

I rub my temples, having a hard time understanding. "Did you think I wouldn't be happy for you?"

"No, that's not it." She pushes her shoulders back like she's getting ready to lay it all out there. "I couldn't leave if I didn't know you were going to be okay. You've only had me and Harlowe for so long . . . I needed you to find your people. And then I saw how you were with Xavier, and I thought he could be your person too. When I saw you two making googly eyes at each other the night of the gala, I knew there was something there."

My head spins with her words, a jumble of revelations that are both tender and cutting. It's like I'm hearing her, but I can't make it all fit. She's been carrying this all alone for months. Holding herself back for me.

That's the last thing I want.

"I needed you to see it too." Her tone shifts from nervous to hopeful. "So, I sent him to Double Play with cake."

Tenley keeps talking, sounding more relieved with each breath. Meanwhile, I'm stuck on one thing. She felt she had to make sure I was okay before she could live her life. She was so worried about me she was considering not going to Spain. The realization hits like a blow to the chest. I almost caged Tenley without even trying to, just like my family did to me.

"More than anything I want you to live a life filled with experiences and people you love. I would never want you to hold yourself back for me." My voice is choked with emotion. "Never, Tenley."

I pull her close, wrapping my arms around her, my nose pressed into her hair, and tell her what I need her to hear. "I'm so damn proud of you. Go see the world. Do great things. Be the incredible nurse I know you can be. And thank you for helping me find my people."

"You're going to be okay, Aunt Vi."

I laugh at the conviction behind her words. "Oh, yeah. How do you know?"

"Because sometimes you just know."

And I believe her. There will be moments of sadness when she's gone, but I have Xavier and Holland to help me through it. I have the girls and the comfort of knowing Tenley is doing what makes her happy. And for the first time in my life I have happiness that's all mine.