Page 37 of On Merit Alone

I should go. That would be the smart thing to do, but even as my head mapped out the right path for me to leave, my heart was fighting for me to stay as I stood there and continued to watch him make shot after shot.

Fed up with my shit, the universe decided for me, causing my hand to lose grip on the fence. I stumbled a step out of my hiding spot.

Ira’s next shot fumbled, catching air as he turned hard in my direction. “Yo, who’s there?”

I froze.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

If I didn't show myself, he’d think it was some crazy, creeper stalker and he might call the authorities. But if I did show myself… then what ?

“Hello?” he called again. I whipped my gaze upward at the sound of him much closer than before. Seconds later, I found myself stumbling backward as I heard footsteps pounding right in front of me. “Hey, what’s going?—”

I squeaked, my footing going wobbly as a strong arm ripped the gate wide open. I would have probably busted my ass if it weren’t for the solid wall of rock that caught my fall.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to… Six?

” Ira dropped his hand from the fence and took a step forward, his head ducking as he peeked at me in the dim light.

By this point, I was covering my mouth with my hand, trying to mask any other embarrassing sounds that might slip out.

But he was already getting even closer, his face morphing from that stern serious frown to something more relaxed.

Something loose and warm. Something I recognized as mine.

He laughed into his words, his cutest smile coming out.

“It is you. What are you doing out here?”

I blinked. Unsure what to say.

He lifted an eyebrow. “Ah, right. Stalking again.”

I dropped my hands. “I didn’t follow you here, if that’s what you think.”

“Sure,” he said, his smile growing wider.

My jaw dropped. “Ira, I didn’t!”

“Yeah, because this is such a popular spot, what with the chained up fence and mandatory maintenance per use.” Moving slightly, he was suddenly pushing the gate open instead of holding it like some sort of weapon, pushing it apart wide enough for me to step through.

“Popular enough that we both know about it,” I mumbled as I stepped past him, purposely ignoring the way the brush of his chest along my shoulder made me flutter. Taking in the court as I stepped out onto it, I said, “What did you fix?”

He scratched at the back of his neck as he trailed behind me. “I just swept up a little. You? ”

Dipping my hand into my gym bag I held up my offering with a sheepish look. “Extra ball.”

We both looked guilty as we met each other’s eyes, then laughed. Tipping his head back to the sky, Ira groaned a little. “I usually bring a new net or something. I even replaced the boards once. I just—tonight was a last minute decision.”

“Me too,” I said. Stripping my gym bag, I started scraping my braids up into a ponytail. “I promise I’m not one of those freeloaders who don’t give back to the court. Hate those guys.”

“Right?” he laughed. He eyed me as I went over to the pile of leaves and sand Ira had swept off the court and picked up the big push broom to go ahead and push it the rest of the way into the brush just outside the sidelines.

Feeling like the freeloader I swore not to be though, I decided to sweep over the court another time for good measure.

When I caught him looking at me, he smiled.

“So you really do come around here? You know the rules and everything.”

I gave him an incredulous look. “You didn’t actually think I followed you here, did you?”

He raised a shoulder. “Hell of a coincidence.”

“You really are arrogant sometimes,” I guffawed. “It may be a big city, but it’s a small world, anyway. Crazier things have happened.”

“Crazier than us playing in the same stadium for years and never running into each other repeatedly until now?” he challenged, scooping up my ball and bouncing it absently. His laid-back demeanor meant nothing, though. Because his eyes were on me—staring, assessing, daring.

I said nothing else as I leaned the broom against the rock wall again, having done my civil duty as an occupant of the court.

I was actively trying to avoid the heated sensation reflexively stirring in the bottom of my stomach.

All a result of the warm sound of Ira’s voice tonight when I wasn’t expecting it .

“Thought you’d be shooting on that huge court you have at home. Not here of all places,” I said to break up the tension of his gaze.

He shrugged. “I like it here. Sometimes I need to get out, leave that house and ground myself, you know? That place, it’s a little…”

I don’t know how I knew what he meant without even hearing the words, but I did. His house seemed a bit much, even for him. And I understood what he meant about this place having a grounding effect.

I tilted my head, something I’d been wondering since I first visited his place entering my mind. “Why do you have that huge family home anyway?”

I hoped to God I didn’t sound weird asking. But judging by the way he snorted, I did. “Because I have a family, Six. Duh .”

I shrugged, the movement a direct ploy to distract myself from my stomach souring. I wouldn’t scold him for assuming, but... “Not everyone does, Ira.”

More staring. It was like he was trying to read between my lines while I was trying desperately to keep the fine print of my heart invisible, and I was great at it. I ignored his gaze so entirely, that I didn’t even hear him move.

“Six?”

I jumped at the proximity of that voice. He’d come up behind me and was leaning around my shoulder to try and get a look at me. I gave him my eyes. “Yeah?”

He extended the ball. “Wanna play?”

“Yeah,” I said, my eyes going from his face to the ball. I took it, dribbling up the court. Slowly, I skipped a little, letting my muscles loosen as I did.

I expected my first few shots to be a little iffy as I eased into warming up for the workout, but pretty soon into shooting, I found I was running into the same problem I had all day.

Missing shots, low focus, low drive. Not to mention Ira wasn’t practicing anymore.

He’d taken to watching me again. Which was also part of the problem.

Running up to rebound another shot that I missed, I whipped a look at him. “We can share the court, you know? You don’t have to stop.”

He shrugged, those eyes still zeroed in on me. “That’s okay. I came here to clear my head. Now that you’re here, it’s… not.”

I paused, the ball stalling between my hands as I frowned. My stomach plummeted. “Oh, I’m sorry. I can go if you need?—”

I had already started retreating when Ira’s hands fell over mine on the sides of the ball. He laughed awkwardly. “No, Six. No. That’s not what I meant.”

I looked up to him. I’d barely started to sweat, but my heart was already beating in a steady rhythm like I played a whole half. “What did you mean, then?”

“I meant that you’re kind of captivating when you play. You’re hard to look away from,” he said, his thumbs coming across the backs of my hands. “And I like watching you.”

“Oh.” I felt my eyelashes flutter against my cheeks as I tried to make sense of that and compose the subsequent flutter in my chest. Swallowing demurely, I said, “Okay.”

His mouth pulled apart in a slow smile as he watched me, hands remaining over mine. “But haven’t you been struggling with these same shots all day?”

“Yeah.” I screwed my mouth to the side. “I guess I have a lot on my mind. I can’t string two good moves together right now.”

He nodded. Then he ducked his head to find my eyes with a mischievous glint. “Want me to help?”

“I’d love it,” I said, surprised since he hadn’t been able to help before.

Taking the ball from my hands, he bounced it as he took a few steps backward. Then, from his spot right under the net, he took a shot. It went straight in, though from this close up, I’d be more surprised if it didn't.

When the ball slipped in, he brought his eyes back around to look at me expectantly. I just looked at him blankly. He raised his brows. “Your turn.”

“For what?”

“Take the shot.”

I laughed. “What are we playing, HORSE?”

He shrugged, “Why not?”

“How on earth is a kids game going to help anything?” I asked.

Jogging over to get the ball himself, he reappeared in front of me and lifted it between us. His voice went into mock horror as he whispered. “I don’t know, it could be fun . Ever heard of that?”

Snatching the ball, I took the shot, standing in the same place with the same arm and the same angle as he had—I was not losing a letter of HORSE on a technicality—and I didn’t even watch as the ball went in.

I was in one of my comfort zones, I knew it would.

Instead, I raised an eyebrow at my “opponent”, crossing my arms over my chest. “I can make shots like this all night. But like I said, it won’t help my game. ”

“Wow, Six, didn’t know you could peacock so much.”

“You asked for it.”

“That I did.” He nodded, taking me in as he walked back with the ball again. “Alright, how about we up the stakes then?”

I groaned. “How about we actually practice and not play kids games?”

He rolled his eyes. “Merit, it’s like eleven at night. We both came here for a reason and that’s not getting our best practice in. Can you lighten up a little?”

I frowned. I hated when people told me to lighten up.

It felt like an insult to my character. Like my personality was too much for them to take on, and they’d rather change me than deal with me as I was.

Ira had taken to telling me to ease up on the intensity a lot, but I thought that was just on court.

I didn’t think about how he might also get tired of who I was.

I cleared my throat. “You want me to lighten up?”

His eyes filtered over my face before meeting mine. “Is this a test?”

“No.” I looked away. “But this is just who I am. So if you’re looking for something else underneath, you’re not going to find it. You can just leave now.”