Page 109 of Mr. Naughty List
If Aaron could talk to his mother, then RJ could talk to his nice, supportive stepdad and work his shit out. Montmartre sunrise promises and all that.
About thirty minutesbefore dinner was supposed to be served, RJ was sent out back to the grill and Doug with a plate of veggies. They fired up the gas and stood awkwardly beside each other for a few minutes before Doug said, “So. I’ve been meaning to tell you.” He cleared his throat. “I’m glad you came home for Christmas.”
“Oh?” RJ had been half expecting Doug to give him grief about how little time he’d actually spent with his mom and siblings after he rediscovered Aaron.
“Yes, it’s meant a lot to your mother. And your brother and sister. And even to Carter.” He used tongs to put the veggies on the grill and concentrated on them as he finished up his declaration. “It meant a lot tome.”
RJ shrugged, unsure what to say. “Oh, um. You’re welcome.”
Doug put the plate aside, lowering the gas so the flames died back a little. “I’m serious, RJ. I never got the chance to know you. I came along after you were gone, and you never came around. I thought you were…” He coughed. “I thought you were like your dad. But I was wrong.”
RJ crossed his arms over his chest, trying not to feel defensive. But how could he deny it? He’d done to his mom what his father had done, hadn’t he? He’d abandoned her. Hadn’t looked back. Left her to fend for herself. Doug was the one who’d saved her.
“I owe you a debt,” RJ said gruffly. “I let Mom down, but you—”
“Your mother is proud of you. You didn’t let her down. Don’t worry about that.”
“I left her behind.”
“You’re the son, RJ. You’re supposed to leave. That’s what we raise our kids to do. If your dream had been accounting, then sure, you could have gotten work in Knoxville. But your dream was music. Your mother was only ever proud of you for following that with your whole heart, and for making it work.”
RJ scrubbed at his leather jacket sleeves, shivering despite the heat of the gas grill. “Thanks. Still, I should have—”
“No shoulds,” Doug said. “We could all should ourselves to death. I’m just grateful you came home, that we had this time, and that we know each other a little better now. I’m glad for all of it. Even the hard conversations that came up because of Carter’s crush. I should have come out to Betsy ages ago. I was worried she’d—” He shrugged. “She loves me. It didn’t matter.”
“She does love you,” RJ said. “And you love her. I…admit it’s hard for me to believe that love can last. Even with Aaron…” He cleared his throat and tried to explain. “Even with him, when I feel so much for him already and can imagine our future so clearly, I’m afraid that if I believe in it, I’ll be wrong. And that will hurt too much to survive.” He said the last in a whisper.
“Your father was a jackass. I’m sorry, but he was.”
“I’m not sorry. It’s the truth.”
“He left you not once, but twice. Now the fact that his leaving was for the best for—”
“He hit her,” RJ said, darkness lapping at his heart. His fists clenched.
Doug nodded, his hand clenching the tongs tightly. The scent of veggies rose around them and Doug removed them from the grill, covering them with aluminum foil to keep them warm. He turned off the grill.
“You’re right that there are no guarantees in life. Maybe it won’t work out with Aaron, but maybe it will—”
“That’s what I’m saying,” RJ said. “That’s what we’ve agreed. That we have to try. That we’ve got something special enough that we both know it already. So we should try.”
“Exactly. That’s all you can do.” Doug clapped a hand on RJ’s shoulder. “Thanks for coming home.”
“Thanks for giving my mom a home.”
Doug hugged RJ with a few manly slaps, and they took the veggies inside and sat down to Christmas dinner. Beau and Perri clamored to sit beside RJ, and Aaron agreed to give up his seat to sit across from him. “The view’s better from here,” he said with a wink as he took the seat. His eyes weren’t red anymore and his smile looked genuine.
“Is it?” Perri asked with a toss of her light hair. “I wanna see.”
“You sit there,” Mom said. “He just wants to look at RJ.”
Carter sat down next to Aaron and said, “Eh, it’s an okay view, I guess. I’ve seen better.” But his voice was all wonky, and he looked at RJ with those same eager eyes that he hadn’t been able to shake since he’d confessed to his crush.
And everyone laughed. Even Carter. Happy family. Handsome lover.
Merry Christmas.
As Christmas Daywaned, Aaron had enough fun with RJ’s family that he was able to forget from time to time that he’d lost his mother’s approval and love—assuming he’d ever really had it.