Page 56 of Men of Fort Dale: The Complete Series

The man chuckled. “Want me to come hold it for you?”

Ugh, there was an image he didn’t need. “I think I can manage.”

Reaching the bar, he leaned over the edge and called to the bartender. “Hey, Ethan, can you cash me out?”

Ethan smirked as he hopped to the nearest register. “Strike gold already?”

Troy snorted. “Just wanna go home, is all, it’s time.”

“Wow, Troy isn’t sticking around to find himself a guy? It’s a Christmas miracle.”

“You’re a few months off for that.”

“Early Christmas miracle then.”

Troy rolled his eyes but let Ethan finish the sale.

Troy signed the receipt and slapped his normally big tip on the total before sliding it back.

Even after only a few months seeing Troy around, Ethan didn’t need to look at the slip before thanking Troy and giving him a wink.

Ethan was good to Troy, occasionally slipping him a free drink or forgetting to include one on Troy’s tab.

Troy attributed that more to the fact that he was fond of spoiling his waitstaff, especially when they were good at what they did, rather than any desire on Ethan’s part to get together with Troy.

Everyone in Raid knew they could flirt with Ethan, but the man’s heart and body belonged to his fiancé at home.

“Have a good and quiet night,” Ethan said as he turned away.

Troy grunted, slipping through the crowd and glancing at the booths.

The guy was still waiting, though his eyes were now glued to his phone.

For a moment, he considered explaining but cringed at what would probably end up as an awkward conversation.

Instead, he took the opportunity to slip through the front doors before the guy looked up and saw him making a break for it. Troy let out a low sigh of relief.

There weren’t a whole lot of people outside prowling the streets.

It was late enough for non-party people to be at home while those out for fun were still in the bars or clubs.

Troy watched a couple of drunk people stumble past, their arms slung around one another as they laughed at some private joke.

Troy’s lip curled, and he shoved his hands into his pockets.

That could have been him if he’d stayed longer with that guy.

His mind slipping away hadn’t been the problem.

It hadn’t in the past. Troy’s mind had been restless for as long as he could remember, and even a hot guy wasn’t enough to keep him focused forever.

With the sole exception of one man, the same man Troy’s mind kept drifting back to rather than on the man whose lap he’d been in.

The thought brought a growl of frustration from Troy, and he kicked a stray bottle, sending it skittering down the sidewalk with a clatter.

The entire point of coming out and having a good time with someone else was to get his thoughts away from Oscar, not to obsess over them.

It wasn’t his fault the man couldn’t decide what he wanted, kissing Troy one minute as though it were the old days and pretending nothing happened afterward.

Troy was within his rights to shove every memory of him and Oscar, every scrap of feelings toward the man, under the rug and out of sight while he enjoyed the company of someone who obviously wanted something out of him.

And yet he couldn’t even manage that.

Troy was so wrapped up in his thoughts he almost slammed into someone coming out of one of the late-night stores. He skidded to a stop, stepping around them, muttering an apology. Then a familiar voice spoke up, filled with a tightness that brought Troy’s head up as quickly as the words.

“What, don’t have your little ‘friend’ with you?” Oscar asked.

Troy turned to face him, groaning in exasperation. “Seriously? Are you following me now?”

“Could ask you the same. All I did was buy something to drink,” Oscar told him, holding up the bottle of Pepsi.

Troy’s frown deepened as Oscar’s words settled into his consciousness. “Doesn’t explain how you know I might have had a ‘friend’ tonight, though.”

Oscar shrugged, dark eyes pinched in annoyance. “What, you’re the only one who goes out on a Wednesday night?”

Troy hesitated, raising a brow. “To Raid? Since when the hell do you go somewhere like Raid?”

“Since tonight.”

Troy gritted his teeth. “Seriously? I tried to get you to go somewhere like that with me for months, Oscar, fucking months. But now, suddenly, you felt the urge to go and just so happened to find me?”

“From the sounds of it, you like to go out a lot, so the chances of me finding you out and about are pretty high.”

Troy took a step back, holding his hands out. “Excuse me? I’m sorry, was that you trying to make me feel bad for...what, doing single stuff?”

Oscar’s eyes flashed. “No, you can sleep with every Tom, Dick, and Harry you want, it’s none of my business.”

“You’re damn right, it’s not your business!”

“But I would’ve thought that after what happened last week, you’d be a little smarter than to hop on the next guy who showed you attention,” Oscar continued.

Troy’s temper broke, and he stepped forward, jabbing a finger into Oscar’s chest. “Alright, you listen to me, Oscar Mateo Reyes and you listen to me right the fuck now. You don’t get to tell me what I do and don’t do with my free time, and you sure as shit don’t get to judge me.”

Oscar leaned back, eyeing Troy’s offending finger balefully. “Who the fuck said anything about judging you?”

“Don’t you fucking try that innocent shit. I know the difference between you being you and you being an ass, and this…this is you being an ass.”

Oscar swatted Troy’s finger away with a huff. “Just because I don’t have any say in where you stick what, doesn’t mean I can’t think it’s stupid. Fuck’s sake, Troy, there’s still some bruises left on your neck!”

“I’m fine,” Troy shot back hotly.

“Right, and anytime I say something like that, you look like I’m straight-up lying and refuse to let me get away with it.”

“Because you are lying when you say that.”

“And you are now.”

“Like hell I am!”

“So it’s perfectly normal to get choked by someone on the street, then turn around and go out and risk the same thing all over again? Right, Troy, because most people wouldn’t have been a little worried, a little cautious, maybe think a little about what they’re doing.”

Troy stepped back with a snarl. “You know what? Maybe you’re perfectly okay with hiding from the world, too scared to actually go out into it, but that doesn’t mean the rest of us have to.”

“Fuck you. I’m not hiding shit.”

“Right, because you haven’t spent your whole life in the closet, scared someone might find out you’re into dick.”

“Shut up,” Oscar hissed, his eyes darting around.

Troy motioned around the empty street. “Who’s going to hear me, Oscar? Hm? Who’s even going to care? You, you’re the only one who’s going to care.”

“It’s nobody’s business,” Oscar said, looking over his shoulder again.

Troy shook his head. “Don’t make this about you being private . This is about you being too scared to be honest.”

“Don’t you dare call me a coward!” Oscar growled.

“You can run into the field of battle without so much as a whisper of worry, but you can’t be in an open, honest relationship with someone you give a shit about!” Troy continued, refusing to be cowed by Oscar’s anger and overbearing attitude.

Oscar’s eyes grew wider, his voice taking on a deeper, more dangerous growl. “Shut up, Troy, I swear to God.”

Troy felt his gut tighten, but he stubbornly held the other man’s gaze. “Or what? You going to make me?”

Oscar’s eyes blazed even brighter, his left hand clenching at his side.

For one wild moment, a suddenly paranoid part of Troy’s mind thought Oscar might take a swing at him.

Not once in all the time he’d known Oscar, with all his growling, stomping attitude and his tendency to get pissed too easily, had Troy ever thought he was in danger, but this felt different.

Troy had never seen Oscar look so angry, his dark eyes shadowed under his heavily creased brow, his jaw so tight it was a miracle he hadn’t cracked any teeth.

“Oscar?” Troy asked hesitantly.

And just like that, the cloud of darkness and rage was gone. Oscar’s shoulders sagged, and his hand unclenched. Oscar took a deep breath, looking down at the sidewalk and shaking his head.

When he spoke, it was so softly Troy almost couldn’t hear him. “No, Troy, I’m not going to...make you do anything.”

“Sorry...just never seen you that pissed,” Troy admitted.

Oscar snorted softly. “You know how to find my sensitive buttons and mash every single one.”

Troy looked away. “I know the feeling.”

Oscar picked his head up. “Why are you out here, Troy? I mean, really, after what happened?”

Troy could only offer the truth. “Stupid as it sounds, I wanted to get away from...you.”

“Me?”

“You, us, the past, my feelings, your feelings, all of it. God, Oscar, my head has been an absolute mess since I saw you in the clinic. I mean, fuck, do you know how hard this has been?”

A shadow crossed Oscar’s face, and he nodded. “I think I have an idea.”

“And I’m sorry, but you kissing me? That gave me hope and made me think something was going to happen.

Then you spent a whole week avoiding me without so much as an explanation, and Jesus, that fucking hurt.

And now you’re out here, acting like a jealous boyfriend, and I don’t know what to think, Oscar. ”

Oscar’s shoulders sagged. “I don’t know what to think, either.”

It was probably the first open honesty he’d had from Oscar other than the impulsive kiss in the clinic.

It was the sort of honesty Troy wanted, but somehow, it didn’t make him feel any better.

All it did was leave them in that gray quagmire they’d been in from the moment Troy had laid eyes on him for the first time in six years.

Troy looked around the street for the first time with a frown. “What are you doing out here anyway?”

Oscar blinked. “Oh, I was waiting for the bus, but it was taking forever, so I went to get something to drink.”

Troy’s eyes drifted to the large vehicle turning the far corner. “That bus?”

Oscar’s eyes widened as he turned to look in the same direction. “Goddammit!”

Troy winced. “We, uh, must not have noticed, being distracted and all.”

“Son of a bitch, I was already stood here forever!”

Troy hesitated before finally nodding over his shoulder. “C’mon, I’ll take you back.”

Oscar shook his head. “It’s fine. I’ll wait for the next one.”

“You’ll be here for an hour, and it looks like you need to get to bed. So quit being stubborn, and I’ll give you a drama-free ride home,” Troy promised.

Oscar sighed, giving in with a nod of his head. “Alright.”

Troy stopped, turning to face him again with what he hoped was an earnest expression. “One more thing.”

Oscar eyed him warily. “What?”

Troy smiled softly. “Just...try to figure it out, this whole thing. There’s obviously something between us you want, but you keep avoiding it.”

“Troy—”

His smile turned sad. “I’m not saying choose to be with me, but make your mind up to be with me or to stay away from me. You can’t keep bouncing between the two like this, Oscar. My heart can’t take it.”

“Mine neither,” Oscar muttered.

“Then figure it out, Oscar, for both our sakes. Because I know where I stand, it’s time you figured out where you do.”