Page 89 of It's Not PMS, It's You

“Hang on just a second, Gary.”

“Okay . . .”

I stuck the phone in my desk drawer and closed it, then leaned toward Dee, whispering, “He wants me to stop by the office after meeting Byron.”

“No! No! No!” Dee said in a low voice, wagging her finger at me. “Don’t you dare. That’s your excuse for skipping the speed dating. You’re going. I’ll handle whatever Gary needs.”

I stared at Dee, torn about what to do, and knowing I had to make a snap decision because Gary was still on the phone waiting. I had never said no to Gary since I had started working for the company ten years ago. Anything he wanted, he got it. If he wanted me to jump, I asked how high. He was going to suspect something if I said no, but part of me wanted to.

Dee shook her head emphatically. “Don’t. You. Dare.”

Don’t feel guilty for taking time for yourself.

Why am I not surprised that Nick’s advice popped into my head again?

I sighed and fell back into my chair, pulling the phone from the drawer and raising it back up to my face. “Hey, Gary. Yeah, unfortunately I can’t make six o’clock. I’ve got things I’ve got to take care of this evening. I can give you a call with an update, though.”

“Oh . . . Work related?”

Wonderful.

Why would he ask me that?

Now, I had to decide if I was going to lie to my boss or not.

I opted for the truth.

“No. Personal things.” I winced, waiting for his response.

“Okay, okay . . . I must say that this isn’t like you, Ruth. I hope it’s important.”

I nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. “It is.Veryimportant.”

“Very well then. I expect an update ASAP.”

“You got it.”

I disconnected the call, set my phone on the desk, and sat back in my chair.

“What?” Dee asked.

I shook my head. “I don’t know . . . I just got the weirdest feeling in my gut.”

“Your gut has always been right. What kind of feeling?”

I shrugged. “It’s just . . . I have been busting my ass for ten years and have gone above and beyond what was expected of me, and this was the first time ever that I . . .” I sighed.

“You did this to yourself.”

“Thanks for your support,” I said.

“But it’s true. Hear me out . . .”

“The stage is yours.”

“Here’s the deal . . . You let them know years ago, before your first day, during your interview, actually, that you were willing to have no life to get to the top. And you didn’t just say that to get the job. You backed up those words with actions. You’ve been clearing the exact path you wanted your career to take. You knew the company well when you started working for Stansfeld. They hire people who have no problem giving up everything for their careers.”

“Yeah, but—”