Page 51 of It's Not PMS, It's You

“Can we stop in here for a minute? I just need to pick up something for the birds in the park.” Max pointed to an informal place with tables and chairs outside.

What could he possibly buy for birds at an Italian restaurant?

“Oh. Okay.”

I was hungry, but he was doing something nice for the birds. How could I have a problem with that? I looked up to see the name of the restaurant, but we were directly under the overhang and I couldn’t see a thing.

It didn’t matter because like Dee said, there wasn’t a bad place to eat in Little Italy.

I glanced down at one of the tables to see what people were eating as I followed Max inside, then stopped, confused, when I noticed sandwiches.

Not just any sandwiches.

Bagel sandwiches.

“Ruth!” Barney came from around the register at the counter and approaching me with way too much enthusiasm. “I thought I’d never seeyouagain! Hey, spill the beans. You just couldn’t resist the temptation of one of my bagels. Or maybe it’s me. Did you just come in to chew the fat?” He gestured to himself. “I know it sounds cheesy, but I am the creme de la creme of the single men. Okay, maybe not cheesy, more like creamy. Ha! Did I just say that?”

This had to be a joke.

I just stared at him.

Max was staring at Barney, too, most likely wondering who the hell he was and why he was looking at me with googly eyes.

I knew Barney said he had three locations, but I had never seen a bagel place in Little Italy.

And of all the places, Max chose this place to stop in?

“We just opened thisrestauranta month ago and look at this place.” Barney winked.

Thanks for clarifying. I don’t care.

“Packed like sardines. That’s why they call me the king of bagels.” Barney held out his hand. “Sorry, where are my manners? I’m Barney, head chef, the big cheese, and restauranteur.”

Somebody gag me.

“I’m Max.” He shook Barney’s hand. “How do you two know each other?”

Barney smiled. “Ruth and I are dating.”

“What?” I yelled, startling some of the customers at the table next to us. I lowered my voice. “We arenotdating. We went on one date and that was it.”

“Okay, you got me there, but you came back for more of the Barney. Am I right or am I right?” He turned to Max and sized him up from head to toe. “What about you? How do you know Ruth?”

This can’t be happening.

Max grinned. “Well, technically we just met. This is our first date.”

And our last if I decide to make a run for it.

“Really?” Barney’s gaze popped back and forth between me and Max. “And what do you bring to the table?”

Max looked confused, looking around the bagel shop. “Which table are you talking about?”

“You know? What do you have to offer Ruth? I mean, what do you do for a living?”

Who was he? My father?

“I’m director of sales for a solar company.”