Page 138 of Hell Bent

“Second year of a two-year contract. I’ll be a restricted free agent.”

“Huh. Don’t want to stay with the Devils?”

“It’s not so much what I want,” I said.

“Come on,” Harlan said. “You’ve got to know how good you’ve done. You think they won’t make you an offer? Free agent signing period starts when this year? March thirteenth?”

“Yeah.” My feet shifted, because this wasn’t my favorite conversation.

“You happy with your agent? Mine’s a killer, and you’re looking pretty damn attractive right now. Want me to set up a meeting?”

“Uh … sure. Worth a shot. I barely heard from mine until this postseason. Not quite feeling the love, you know?”

“I know,” Harlan said. “And you’ve got to look out for yourself while football lasts. I’ll give him a call, then. He’ll be in Vegas this week, making sure his guysdon’tfeel neglected. Vince Haliburton.”

Well, yeah. Vince Haliburton would be a good agent to have. This was playing with the big boys.

Harlan wasn’t done, because his next words were, “How about Alix?”

“What about her?”

He looked at me out of his movie-star face and said, “Jennifer likes her a lot. Says she’s in love with you and that she’s good with Ben. That serious?”

I said, wanting to tell and also not wanting to, “She wants to stop doing the electrician thing and go back to school. Different major, though. She was about done at Stanford when she came up here, but she says—” I rubbed my hands on my jeans, then realized what I was doing and stopped. “That she wants to switch from Statistics to Electrical Engineering. Two and a half years more, something like that.”

“Back at Stanford?” Harlan was frowning.

“She didn’t say,” I admitted. “I looked it up, though, and Stanford’s the second-best school in EE. Makes sense, the tech world being centered there and all. MIT’s number one, but as she already has most of a degree from Stanford and I’m guessing was a star there …”

“Is it the Ben thing after all? That too much complication for her?”

“No.” Was this the most uncomfortable conversation in the world, or what? “Jennifer’s right, she likes Ben. Looks out for him, especially when I’m not home. She’s independent as hell, but she—” I stopped, because I didn’t know where I was going here.

Harlan said, “So she told you she wanted to go back to school, and you didn’t say, ‘Stay here?’”

“Obviously I said that.” I knew I was scowling, but how could I not? “At least I’m sure I said something like that. She says I push. I was trying not to push, all right? I was trying to be supportive.”

“Or,” he said, “you were scared to make a plan. Hey, I’ve been scared to make a plan plenty.”

“Right. With your sister and your wife and your kid and your big-ass house and your four-year contract and all. I can see that we’re exactly the same. Alix and I have been together a few months. How can I expect her to want to fit into my plans after a few months, especially when I don’t evenknowmy plans?”

Harlan said, “Jennifer got pregnant. Accidentally. We’ve been married less than two years.”

That one took me aback. I said cautiously, “But it worked out.”

“Yeah,” he said, “because I pushed. She wasn’t exactly falling all over herself to believe in me. You’ve actually got a relationship going, which puts you way ahead of me. She living with you?”

“What is this,” I asked, “the Lonely Hearts Club?”

He grinned. “Nah, just more interesting than Vegas. So does that mean shewon’tlive with you?”

I said reluctantly, “She’s staying over more. Has a trailer out in Cascade Locks, though. She says she wants to believe in us, or count on us, something like that, which is good, but she also mentioned—again—how much she values her independence. Her folks are well off and then some—the woman’s literally a princess—and she’s seen it and doesn’t want it, is all I can come up with. Who knew a girl wouldn’t want you because you make too much money? And I’m not even a wide receiver.”

“Baby steps,” Harlan said, as the big bus lumbered onto the apron of a huge block of sand-colored resort hotel, surrounded by sand-colored rocks and, yes, palm trees. “You want my advice, though?”

“If I say no, does that mean you won’t give it to me?”

“Nope. Here you go, then. My best advice. Decide whatyou want, be damn sure about it, and lay it on the line. Don’t give her any room to doubt you. If you’re all in, tell her so.”