Page 5 of From Angel to Rogue (Four Foxes #6)

PAST

KATY

“Katy, come stand here in the middle, honey.” My mom’s soft voice beckoned me, but I was too busy licking the chocolate off my fingers.

I loved chocolate cupcakes.

They were yummy and they made me feel happy.

And Mom told me I should always do whatever made me feel happy.

So here I was, having my third cupcake.

“Katy, come on, honey,” Mom groaned, gesturing to me. “You can have your cupcake later.”

“Fine,” I muttered, setting them aside as I hurried to stand beside Matty, whose pinched eyes were locked on the floor.

It hurt knowing my twin was hurting on the inside. I didn’t know what was really wrong with him, but Mom said he was sick, and that made him a bit rowdy at times. He liked to run off in the middle of conversations and scream when the sounds got too loud.

I knew he was on the brink of running away with the way he was fidgeting with his tiny bow tie that Dad made him wear. The pretty blue color of it matched my pressed frilly dress.

Our entire family was dressed smart today because we were taking a family picture.

“Matty,” I whispered, leaning closer to my brother as I held out a pinkie. “You’ll be fine.”

He nodded, closing his fist around it. Even though he was my twin, born just minutes before me, his hands were bigger, and he was taller than me already. It just wasn’t fair.

Not even a second passed when I noticed some of the frustration leave his eyes. My heart flared with relief. I knew holding my hand would calm him down.

“Katy, now look here,” Mom said, pointing the video camera at my face. “Today is Katy’s first day of third grade. Tell me baby, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

I smiled proudly at the camera. “I want to be a mom and be the best wife to the love of my life and have lots and lots of children,” I said truthfully. “Oh, also knit my babies cute sweaters.”

My mother’s face turned red while Dad laughed, and Matty gave me a weird look.

“Katy, you can’t say things like that!” Mom scolded while Dad consoled her.

What did I do wrong? Was there something wrong with me wanting those things? We could be anything we wanted when we grew up, right? If so, then what was so bad about me wanting to be a mother?

I was still confused by my mother’s outburst when she turned her question to Matty and he thought for a long moment before he shrugged saying he didn’t know, which made Mom heave out a sigh.

After our videos, Mom and Dad positioned us in different poses while a photographer with a huge mustache captured a dozen pictures of us, and the entire time I never let go of my brother’s hand.

I liked doing that. I liked helping someone, especially the people I loved.

And there weren’t a lot of people I loved, just my mom, dad, and my brother. But I hoped one day, I would love lots of people and that lots of people would love me.

For the last part, Mom and Dad joined us for a complete family picture. I knew by the end of this weekend the picture would be hanging on top of our fireplace in a pretty frame. Because it was our family tradition every school year.

“Katy, Matt, we need to go now.” Mom rushed us out the door, her shoulders tensed as she locked the door behind us.

Dad, however, had a smile playing on his lips while he whispered to his wife, “Calm down, honey. We still have plenty of time.”

“I know, George, I just don’t want them to be late on their first day of school,” Mom replied, her pale green eyes, the same color as mine and my brother’s, shined with nervousness.

Matty and I were not nervous though, because this was a daily occurrence for us. Mom always panicked before school for some reason even though we always made it on time.

Dad reassured her once again before settling us both in the back seat and driving off to school.

Matty and I spent the entire car ride looking out the window quietly while Mom and Dad spoke about their job.

They were both civil workers at the office in the town square and were always super busy all the time, so Matty and I were used to their conversation, which we understood nothing about.

“Be careful, both of you.” Mom hugged us both tightly, kissing the tops of our heads. “And take care of each other.”

“Okay,” we both mumbled as we waved goodbye to a beaming Dad and hurried off to school.

My heart felt like it was galloping to my throat as we reached the entrance. I swallowed as my fingers twirled around the lace of my dress.

I prayed I would make my first friend today.

“Bye, K,” Matty muttered, nodding to me as he left for his class.

I waved at his disappearing back, hating the fact that we were in separate classes. He was the only friend I ever had in school, my protective blanket, and without him, I had no clue what to do.

But Mom said I was a big girl now, and making friends was easy. She said I just had to be myself and people would love me.

You just have to be yourself, Katy.

I took a deep breath and entered my class.

My eyes dragged over the filled seats in my classroom. Some were new faces, while the others were familiar faces from last year.

My lips tugged into a small smile as I walked to the lone empty seat by the window, but no one seemed to spare me a glance, and that deflated some of my hope.

Everyone already had someone to talk to and were all busy chatting among their groups.

Was I too late?

Just as I settled into my seat, a pretty girl whom I’d never seen before entered the class and when she smiled, the entire class smiled back at her and some even nodded at her like they knew her from before.

Why did they all smile at her and not me? Was there something wrong with me? Or was I doing it all wrong?

My eyes followed her as she took the seat in front of me, her raven hair bouncing like coils of spring and her blue eyes wide as she blinked at everyone.

She was my height, wearing a pretty dress similar to mine—only hers fit more gracefully over her thin frame, while mine curved around my bulging belly and my round arms.

Yes, I was a bit chubbier than the girls my age, but Mom and Dad said I looked adorable, and they said not every person looked the same and that everyone was beautiful no matter their size.

I did agree. Everyone was beautiful in their own way.

And I think I did look cute. I had thick, shiny blond hair, glowing skin, and big round eyes.

Soon, everyone in our class crowded around the new girl, asking her so many questions. I leaned in, trying to be a part of the conversation, but everyone spoke above me, and they all treated me like I was invisible, so I cowered back into my seat.

Why won’t anyone talk to me?

They all scurried away when our homeroom teacher, Ms. Rachel, came in greeting everyone with a warm smile and a cheery good morning.

And it was only then that the pretty girl, whose name I caught as Sabrina, met my eyes.

Even her name was pretty, like a Disney princess.

“Hey,” Sabrina whispered, smiling.

Joy elated my heart, and I grinned. “Hey, I’m Katy.”

“Nice to meet you, Katy,” she mumbled before turning back to class.

There, just like Mom said, it was easy to make a friend.

I just had to be myself.

And before I knew it, it was lunch break. I hated lunch breaks because I had to eat by myself.

My brother didn’t do well in crowded places, so he got special permission to eat in the teacher’s room. I wished I could join him. I even begged Mom, but she chided me, saying I needed to eat with my friends.

But I didn’t have any friends.

Although now it was different, right?

“Hey, Sabrina.” I poked a finger at her shoulder, and she twisted, her brows raised in question.

“Do you want to have lunch with me?” I asked, my heart thudding in my chest at what she had to say.

Her bow-shaped lips pressed into a small smile. “Okay.”

“Amazing,” I replied, grinning.

God, I was so happy. “So are you new to Bellevue?” I asked as I walked beside her.

“Yes,” she said softly. “My mom and dad grew up here, and they wanted to come back to their hometown.”

“I have lived here all my life. It’s my home, and I love it.

Also, you’re the first friend I ever made in school,” I blurted out.

I just couldn’t help myself; I was so excited.

Having a girlfriend was going to be so much fun.

I was already planning on making us matching friendship bracelets and having fun playdates at my house.

I couldn’t wait.

Over the next few weeks, Sabrina and I became the best of friends. Although it was hard to get her alone because everyone was fighting for her attention for some reason.

Even at lunch, our table was filled. All the boys and girls in our class wanted to know everything about her. I sat by her side, keeping my head down while she focused all her energy on them.

But over the past few days, the crowds thinned, and only Cassandra and Fiona remained, the two other popular girls in our grade.

I didn’t like them.

They never spoke to me, and I tried for a while before giving up. I just didn’t understand why they had to ruin my lunchtime with her.

“Sabrina, we are baking cookies at Cass’s house this weekend,” Fiona chirped. “Chocolate chip. It’s going to be yummy. You should come.”

“I would love that,” Sabrina replied with an overly sweet smile that made her eyes glow. Almost as if they made her happy.

It stung when I looked at them expectantly and they didn’t even bother inviting me out of courtesy. I knew it was a mean thing to do, but I didn’t say a word.

How could Sabrina even like them?

But it wasn’t her fault, right? They invited her and if they didn’t like me, what could she do?

During the entire break, they carried on talking about a new TV show and Cass’s new pet, as if I didn’t even exist. It only dug the hurt more in my chest.

“Sabrina, can I talk to you after school?” I asked, biting my lip just as we finished lunch.

Cass and Fiona exchanged glances with Sabrina while they murmured something to themselves, but I didn’t really care about them. They weren’t my friends.

Sabrina frowned at me. “What about Katy?”

“I just want to talk to you,” I said. “Alone.”

“Fine,” she mumbled, nodding before we all headed back to class.

And I just couldn’t wait till the end of the day to give her the present I spent the entire week making.

It was a knit patch with her initial on it, in a new rib stitch that I learned. I even did it in her favorite color, pale sky blue. I had my fingers crossed that she loved it.

And when the last bell rang, I all but dragged her to an empty corner in the schoolyard.

“Here.” I handed her the present that I put inside a nice pouch that had butterflies in it. “This is for you.”

“What is this, Katy?” she asked in a skeptical tone but didn’t take the pouch from my hand.

“It’s a umm… It’s a knit swatch.” I blushed. “I made it for you. Because you’re my best friend.”

“I don’t think I want to be friends with you anymore, Katy.” Her eyes flickered as her lips curled. “And we aren’t really best friends. You shouldn’t say that out loud.”

Her words felt like a rude slap from a teacher. “But I…I thought we were friends.”

“No, Katy, not really.” Sabrina’s lips thinned. “I only hung out with you because you insisted, and I felt bad for you. But really, you should go and make friends who are more like you. I like Cass and Fiona and feel like they would be better friends for me.”

There was a thick band of hurt forming in my chest. “More like me? What is that supposed to mean?”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh please, don’t tell me you don’t know what the others are saying about you?”

“Wha… what are they saying about me?”

“Your brother is weird. They say he has mental problems. And you’re his twin. They say it runs in the family.”

A sudden burst of anger shot through me and I shoved her before I could stop myself. “Don’t you dare talk about my brother that way! He’s far better than all you morons could ever be.”

Her eyes widened. “I knew you were as crazy as your brother.”

“And you’re… you’re just a stupid bitch.” I knew saying the ‘b’ word was wrong, but right now, I was mad, so very mad.

“And you’re just a fat loser,” she sneered before running away.

My vision blurred and a burn took over my throat.

I felt rejected.

I felt shunned.

I didn’t know how long I stood there, but the pain in my palm snapped me. It was only then that I realized I was still clutching onto the pouch in a death grip. I gritted my teeth as I hurled it at a nearby trash can in anger.

Mom lied.

Everything she told me was a lie.

The real world didn’t work the way she said it would.

People didn’t love her daughter for the way she was.

People liked shiny, pretty things that spoke the right way and said the right thing.

I had no clue how I was going to do it, but I wanted to prove Sabrina wrong.

That Matty Evans’s so-called lunatic sister could also make her own friends.

And I just couldn’t wait to rub it in her face.