Page 44 of Falling for a Grumpy Hero

LILA

R ook trotted in behind Ford and immediately made a beeline for me. He pressed his big black and gold head against my leg and I smiled through the tears, scratching behind his ears. “Hey, beautiful boy. Thanks for the hug.”

His tongue lolled out of his mouth and those soulful brown eyes drifted up to mine. Black nose nudging my leg, he cocked his head and stared at me as if he was asking if I was alright now. I gave him another smile—even though I knew it was a sad one.

“I’m going to be just fine,” I murmured. “I’m disappointed, but it’s just a setback.”

Ford shifted on his feet, the movement drawing my gaze back to him.

As our eyes met, I felt that familiar electricity humming to life between us, buzzing right beneath my skin.

I wished I could throw myself into his arms and spend all day looking into those navy blue eyes, but I still wasn’t sure where I stood with him, and for the moment, it felt like I needed to keep my distance.

Physically, at least. Emotionally, I was glad he was here.

The thought that he actually cared made my heart race and my insides feel all gooey, but it wasn’t just that.

I’d really needed someone to talk this through with, and since it seemed like he hadn’t come to rub it in my face, I was really happy to see him.

He was one of only two people I was close to in this city, and Addy was at school. Plus, her perspective on things was often very similar to my own. Ford’s was completely different. I knew I had to learn from the situation I found myself in. I just didn’t know how.

“Can I make you some coffee?” he asked instead of responding to my offer of a drink just a minute ago.

“I’m not so out of touch that I don’t realize people like hot beverages when they’re upset.

I still don’t really understand it. Never have.

Hot beverages can hurt you if you spill them while your hands are shaky, as they tend to be when you’re upset, but no one ever seems to want anything cold. ”

A smile touched my lips. This stoic, sexy, confident businessman seemed so freaking unsure of himself right then, standing in the center of my studio apartment with his hands in his pockets, his lips slightly parted, head tilted, and brow furrowed.

“I’d love some coffee,” I said, deciding not to call him out on his discomfort. I knew it had taken a lot for him to come here, especially after how we’d left things yesterday. “I spoiled myself with a brand new machine after my last paycheck. Would you like me to show you how it works?”

“Nah, I’ll figure it out. I’m an engineer, in case you missed it.”

I chuckled and arched an eyebrow, but didn’t contradict him. “Yeah, I guess you are. Have at it, then.”

People needed a master’s degree to operate that machine as far as I was concerned. If the salesperson hadn’t given me a full demo on the model they’d had in the shop, I never would have gotten it right, but I ambled over to the couch with Rook and sat down.

The affectionate pooch waited for me to get settled before he jumped right up and snuggled into my side like he was still just a puppy instead of a fully grown, highly trained service animal. I draped my arm around him and pulled him closer, absolutely adoring the cuddles.

Meanwhile, Ford had rolled up the sleeves of his black button-down and was fighting for his life trying to figure out my fancy new machine. I watched the shirt stretch and pull over the muscles in his biceps, ripples forming in the fabric between his shoulder blades.

Quiet and focused, he finally managed to get pods into the correct slots, worked out how to operate the control panel, and a few moments later, coffee started dripping into the mugs he’d positioned under the nozzles.

A satisfied grin touched only the corners of his full lips and he propped a hip against the counter, waiting for the mugs to fill.

The earthy, bitter scent of fresh coffee wafted through the studio by the time our mugs were full. Ford carefully carried mine to me, and after he’d handed it over, he took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, turning to give Rook the stink eye.

“Why is it that as soon as I turn my back, you two always end up cuddling?” He sighed before he raked a hand through that dark hair and looked at me. “So, are we talking about it or not?”

I considered his offer for a moment, wondering if it was too soon to debrief about the whole situation, but in the end, Ford had known this was coming.

Something had clued him in to the fact that Rodrigo was somehow going to make a mess of this for me and I really did want to learn how he’d done that.

It felt like an important lesson if I wanted to avoid it happening again. “Let’s talk about it. First and foremost, how did you know to be careful of them?”

“I don’t trust anyone,” he said easily and fixed those gorgeous, stormy eyes on mine.

They were clearer today, which was a relief.

Yesterday, they’d seemed completely blank, like he hadn’t been in there at all.

As he looked at me now though, I saw traces of that guy who liked me in them and I wondered how long he was going to stick around this time before the trauma won out again. I didn’t ask. Didn’t even bring it up.

I had always been the support person in other people’s lives when they were going through hard times and I really found myself enjoying having him here to lean on.

Even though I knew he was going through a lot of stuff of his own.

I just got the feeling he would talk to me about whatever had happened when he was ready.

Right now, he was here to support me and I knew I needed that support, so I accepted it without being a brat about how he’d reacted the other night. One thing at a time.

“A lot of people thrive on control, but they don’t always know how to take it,” he said, his voice grave but gentle. “They seem to think that the way to do it is by treading on other people. Bringing them down. Exerting their authority on them like a dictator.”

“Okay,” I said slowly. “So you think this definitely came from Rodrigo, then?”

He dropped his chin in a nod. “Undoubtedly. Over the years, I’ve dealt with plenty of clients like him.

I’ve learned to spot the type and you will as well, but it comes down to decency and respect.

If they treat you as less-than just because you’ve been contracted in, then it’s unlikely they’re ever going to respect you as an expert in the field they brought you in for. ”

“So what do I do?” I let my eyes drift shut and focused on Rook’s heat pressing into my side. “I feel like such a failure and my career hasn’t even begun yet. I’m honestly starting to wonder if maybe going back to school was a mistake and?—”

“Don’t.” The word came out strong and forcefully, his expression turning into a mask of steel. “Don’t ever think like that. It wasn’t a mistake. You’re not a failure. This is the work of someone with an inferiority complex the size of Mars, and frankly, he’s right to feel inferior. He is inferior.”

My eyebrows shot up. “You can’t say stuff like that about people.”

He frowned. “Why not? It’s true. Clearly, he and Eliza have some things they need to work out, and somehow, you got caught in the middle.

I’m sorry that happened, Lila. Truly. It’s not right.

In fact, it’s massively unfair, but those designs are masterful.

You should definitely still turn them in for your class. ”

“Do you really think so?”

“Absolutely.” He brought his steaming mug to his lips.

His eyes took on a thoughtful gleam as he blew across the surface of his coffee.

Wisps of steam scattered and he finally took a small sip.

The strong column of his throat bobbed when he swallowed it.

Then he focused his gaze on the golden ball that was the late afternoon sun hanging in the sky outside.

“You are talented, Lila. Your teachers are going to be impressed by those designs and I’m confident that in the long run, they’re going to help you kickstart your career, but not if you allow Rodrigo to get in your head.

He’s an asshole. Accept it and move on.”

I snorted trying to hold back a bark of surprised laughter. Ford was obviously trying as hard as he could to make to feel better and it was working. He wasn’t the type of person to blow smoke up someone’s ass. If he thought those designs were crap, he would have said it.

“Do you want to come for a walk on the beach with Rook and me?” he suddenly asked as he glanced at me. “It’s a nice afternoon for it and I think we could all use some fresh air.”

“Rook hates the beach,” I said before I’d even thought about it, shutting up as soon as I realized what I’d just said.

Ford frowned at me. “How do you know?”

Shit. Crap . Carefully giving him a shrug I hoped was nonchalant, I glanced at the dog burrowing into my side. “I don’t know for sure. I just feel like he’s not beachy.”

“Well, let’s do it anyway.” He abandoned his coffee and got up, holding my gaze as he slowly extended a hand toward me.

For a moment, I considered leaving him hanging.

Despite the fact that we were talking, we still hadn’t discussed anything that had happened on Saturday.

I kind of felt like that was going to become an elephant in the room now that we’d spoken about the Heritage House catastrophe, but I still placed my palm in his and let him pull me up.

Sparks shot across my skin at the contact, so intense that I almost groaned, but I bit it back.

I was so gone for this guy. So utterly attracted to him, mind, body, and soul, and yet, I still wasn’t sure how he felt about me.

It made for a pretty nerve-wracking situation, but I held his hand on our way out the door, trying to take comfort in Rook’s nails clacking on the tiles behind us.

He didn’t release my hand when we reached the elevator or the lobby, simply maneuvering himself out of my way so I could precede him in and out of doors.

Then we were on the sidewalk, the warm afternoon sunshine on our faces and still he held on to me.

When we reached the beach, I suddenly remembered that he was still injured.

I turned to ask him if it would be safer to stay on the promenade, but as I watched him walk, I realized he wasn’t limping anymore.

“How’s the leg?” I asked. “You seem to be moving around a little easier.”

“I’m fine. I’ve been hurt much worse and I made it through that. I’ll make it through this, too.” Humor lit behind his eyes and he bumped his hip into mine. We made our way onto the sand. “Would you still hang out with me if I needed knee replacement surgery?”

I chuckled at the joke but shrugged. “Yeah, I think so. Only after you got out of the wheelchair, though. I’m not strong enough to lift you in and out of something like that. I’d need back replacement surgery if I tried.”

He laughed softly, but the truth was that I’d hang out with him any time, under any circumstances, for the rest of my life if he’d let me. I really was madly in love with him, but I had no clue how he’d react if I just said it.

It hadn’t gone particularly well for me the last time I’d blurted it out, but as we sat down together on the warm sand, the azure blue ocean in front of us, waves gently lapping at the shore and seagulls circling overhead, I was almost lulled into trying again.

Just as I was about to broach the subject, however, Ford pulled his knees up to his chest, draping his arms loosely around them and then glancing at Rook. “Stop being lazy and go make some friends, boy.”

Other dogs were running all over, chasing gulls, sticks, and each other, having a complete ball of a time, but Rook responded by dropping his head into my lap and shutting his eyes. Yeah, I’m going to go ahead and take that as a sign. This isn’t the right time to tell him.

Ultimately, I’d promised myself I would let Ford take the lead and go at a pace he was comfortable with.

When I’d failed to do that, he’d shut down on me completely.

I wouldn’t risk it again. I loved him too much to push him and I knew he wasn’t ready for this.

All I could do was hope that someday he finally would be.